in their first months of life....

a lot of women post about "am i spoiling too much by picking them up" and all that....

im not a professional, of course, but have done a lot of reading and today, who hannah is, speaks for itself.

no, u cant spoil your child this early...tend to every need they have. every time they cry, or whimper or anything- be there....pick them up, coddle them, show them how much they are loved......you will be raising and independent child if u do- and i know many women on here have said this, including me.

hannah was that baby- any time for any reason, she was picked up......i believe this built her security, and she knew that no matter what, we would always be there....

now i have a 14 month old DD who is as independent as ever- who plays solo unless i am playing with her or reading to her or something....its like, she does ME the favor to play with her...i know she needs me, but shes just off on her own, and i sit back sometimes and just watch her- at the park, going from thing to thing, in between bushes, picking up rocks....and at home, going from toy to toy, making her own little games.....it HURTS that shes fine with being solo and doesnt always tug my leg and pick me up mommy and all that..... so no, i dont think any child can be spoiled- youll just be raising a child who is secure in their parents love....

k, thats all i got.....im gettin all emotional, going back to work next week, thinking hannah wont even realize im gone bc shes little miss independent....

Re: in their first months of life....

I agree completely.

I believe by reassuring them that I was there for them during those first months of life, it gave my children the confidence to go explore the world on their own because they knew I was still there if needed.

This isn't to say they aren't going to have separation anxiety, that you shouldn't CIO when they're older & no one is getting a night's sleep or that you should run the minute they cry (you can walk).

At the newborn stage, they cry because they have a need that needs to be met.

Independence doesn't mean they don't love you. It means they have the confidence to go forth - confidence you gave them.

and yes, Hannah will know that you're not there but will have a new routine to look forward to & will know that you'll be back because that's the message you gave her.

Message edited 8/31/2007 6:24:09 AM.

Re: in their first months of life....

This was a very big fear of mine because I knew I was sending him to a daycare center at 8 wks old. I was so worried he'd be in for a rude awakening going to a room full of babies where they wouldnt be holding him the way I was....

But, the opposite happened. He was so content to sit and watch. They wound up loving him so much at daycare because he watched and never cried that they always gave him a little extra attention because he was such a delight!!!!