Is it just me or what? re: my Kindergartener

My DS is in 2nd grade and DD is in Kindergarten. On the school bus, they usually want the K kids to sit in the first few rows but she will sit with my DS and his friend a few rows back. There's a boy who keeps harrassing her that she can't sit there. He's in 2nd or 3rd grade. Then he tells my DS that she cant sit there and DS tells him that it's not his sister so it's not his business. But everyday the kid keeps pestering my DD. WT F? I was getting so annoyed so I let my DH call the Asst principal and instead of saying she would look into it, she's sort of arguing with my DH that the K kids should sit in the front. DH already spoke to the bus driver who said he didn't mind if she sat with her brother. I have no issue with my DD sitting in the front, I actually didn't realize she wasn't sitting there more often but who is this kid to keep pestering her? If the bus driver or a teacher told her where to sit, I have no issue at all. But why is a 7 or 8 year old boy constantly bugging a 5 year old girl? He's the same kid who was trying to shake my son down for a Bakugan last year, luckily I explained to my son that it's not "trading" when someone doesn't give you something in return.

And now I'm ****** bc of the asst principal....I don't expect her to kiss my butt but at least say you'll look into it. She never called my DH back like he asked her to - my DD said the boy didn't say anything to her the next day but today he is back bugging her. My DD said the teacher at the bus line didn't mind her staying with her brother...so WT F? Should I just call the asst principal myself since I am the one who will be more pizzed or let DH handle it since he made the first call . I'm much more likely to show my irritation on the phone. I am not someone who calls about every little thing but she keeps talking about how this kid is bothering her, she has said his name about 150x since I first heard about it so obviously it's bothering her. And she's not a kid who gets upset easy. WWYD?

Re: Is it just me or what? re: my Kindergartener

Keep calling until the bullying stops. That's what this is, bullying. Consider calling the other kid's parents.

Re: Is it just me or what? re: my Kindergartener

I would definitely keep calling. Maybe call the principal and explain the situation. All schools should have zero tolerance towards bullying.

Re: Is it just me or what? re: my Kindergartener

I would talk to my DH & tell him that I'll follow up with him. I think you may need to use some buzzwords like "he's bullying my daughter. last year he was bullying my son. I expect that you value my children's safety as much as I do & I expect that you're going to do something about this boy. Please let me know what & when you decide to do. I cannot have my daughter afraid to get on the bus because of this boy."

I would also tell the bus driver what's going on - even if it's writing the bus transportation company to make them aware of it. Say something along the lines of you know his job is to drive your children & that he should be completely focused on that, but wanted to make him aware that your children are being bullied on the bus.

Personally, I think your daughter should be sitting with the kindergartners anyway. Mainly because her brother & his friends aren't going to be there to stick up for her & she should spend more time with her own class. I agree that the principal should be more concerned that he's got a kindergartner who is developing anxiety over getting on the bus than where she is sitting.

eta. you can also call the school counselor. I know ours is very on top of that sort of thing.

Message edited 10/16/2009 11:09:16 PM.

Re: Is it just me or what? re: my Kindergartener

I agree this is bullying and the school should get the bully's parents involved and put a stop to it.

I feel they should also notify the teacher that puts them on the bus and the bus driver but I'm not familiar with how this all works yet.

for your kids. I know this can't be easy for them. I'm so impressed with your son standing up for his sister in such a mature, calm way. I applaud you as parents that your kids can talk to easily about a tough situation.

Re: Is it just me or what? re: my Kindergartener

I too agree that the kid is a bully but that said, the driver probably isn't following district and/or bus company policy.

Frankly, she belongs with the younger kids and letting her sit further back creates a problem for other children who want to do the same. My guess is the school won't take this seriously until she is sitting where she is suppose to be.

Re: Is it just me or what? re: my Kindergartener

Re: Is it just me or what? re: my Kindergartener

I do agree that the kid is a bully, but that is a separate issue.

I see where the AP is coming from (although, I don't agree with her attitude). It's probably school policy for the Kindergarteners to sit in the front of the bus.

I would report the bullying, but would also have DD sit in the front of the bus.

Re: Is it just me or what? re: my Kindergartener

I would go into the school, ask to speak with the principal and tell her that if this situation is not handled asap, then you would like the boys # to speak with his parents directly.

Re: Is it just me or what? re: my Kindergartener

Is the sitting in the front couple of rows a real rule or just what people "do"?

If it is a real rule, then she should sit with her age group, if the bullying continues, then of course follow up with the school.

This isn't a flame, and I do NOT condone that he was bullying her, but if she wasn't supposed to be sitting there then you aren't 100% correct either.

Re: Is it just me or what? re: my Kindergartener

The problem is the busdriver is not enforcing the rules. If the kindergarteners sit in front( and I assume the bully was made to do this when he was a kindergartener) then he needs to make her sit there. I know my DD HAD to sit in the front in Kindergarten, no exceptions.

Re: Is it just me or what? re: my Kindergartener

If they don't do anything about it I would march myself onto that bus and tell the kid myself he better leave my daughter alone

School's have a zero tolerance policy and the fact that the asst. principal is doing nothing about it would upset me. Damien swung his book bag and it hit someone in the face (the hitting in the face was accidental) and the principal called to inform me about it.

I would encourage her to sit in the front with her peers, especially since her brother is pretending she's not his sister he probably wants her up front too

Re: Is it just me or what? re: my Kindergartener

No Stacey, he was not pretending she's not his sister, he said to the boy "She's not your sister so it's none of your business" so he was defending her. I was proud of him bc he has been learning social skills on dealing with bullies and he knows you can't let them get to you.

As far as her sitting in the front, yes she should be. It's my understanding they want them to but as most people with kids on buses know, there is only a bus driver, no bus matrons so the bus rules have a good bit of flexibility. If it was a hardfast rule, the driver and teacher would not tell her it's OK. I didn't even know she was sitting in the front - when they get on in the AM, I see her sitting in the 4th row many times. Seems pretty close to the front to me. But whatever the case, I have no issue with her sitting in the front and agree that it is better for her to sit with K kids in general. But the bus driver said it was OK when my DH asked and DD & DS said the teacher or aide who monitors them on the bus line for the trip home had no issue with it. So we do not need to answering to 7 or 8 year old. And I am not going to tell her to sit in the front just to stop this kid, he needs to stop regardless of where she is sitting. And the school needs to handle it differently. Thank you for the replies, I have decided I will call on Mon. Trust me, I will be more forceful than DH. It sometimes works to my disadvantage if I am fired up so I will try to be clear without being angry. I am disappointed with how the school handles things in general. The word bully will def be used. Thanks again.