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MarisaK
HELLO Manolo !!
Member since 5/06 14562 total posts
Name:
Marisa
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Is it really evil of me to be dreading the Holidays?
I'll be 20 weeks for Thanksgiving - and I kind of have a belly now ........nothing major, but you can tell I'm PG. -
I HATE people touching me - Well, not EVERYONE, but the idea of someone just putting their hands all over my stomach is a huge pregnancy 'fear' of mine -
My own family is one thing, they know how I am and I can tease them to back the eff up  - but I am having nightmares about having to deal w/ DH's Dad's side of the family -
His Grandmother is weight obsessed, and even though I've only gained 2 lbs so far, I KNOW she's going to have PLENTY to say about the way I look -
And the idea of my FIL touching my stomach makes me want to throw up -
And everyone else w/ their opinions and you should/shouldn't lists starting is making me crazy -
I am normally NOT one to freak out over something before it even happens, but I am   already !!!
And I can't even have a glass of WINE !!!!!!!!
Any suggestions for how to suck it up and deal ??? 
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Posted 11/18/08 2:47 PM  |
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bonitachyc
big sister status may 2012!!
Member since 5/08 3242 total posts
Name:
Lupe
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Re: Is it really evil of me to be dreading the Holidays?
ugh no suggestions, just lots of  ...my family isn't touchy feely but DH's family??  it's like i had a "feel free to rub" sign on my belly 24/7! i guess my best advice is to b*tch to your DH about how uncomfortable you feel when ppl touch you and he'll relay that info to his peeps...worked for me! 
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| Posted 11/18/08 3:01 PM |
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pickles16
Real Estate Professional
Member since 11/07 17227 total posts
Name:
Jen
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Re: Is it really evil of me to be dreading the Holidays?
I totally feel you, I saw a bunch of DH's side on Rosh Hashana this year, and haven't seen them in a while and they were all over my belly... Unfortunately or fortunately my face can't hide my distaste for random ppl touching me....so they quickly stopped...so no real suggestions, but I do feel your pain!!!
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| Posted 11/18/08 3:01 PM |
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MarisaK
HELLO Manolo !!
Member since 5/06 14562 total posts
Name:
Marisa
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Re: Is it really evil of me to be dreading the Holidays?
Posted by pickles16
I totally feel you, I saw a bunch of DH's side on Rosh Hashana this year, and haven't seen them in a while and they were all over my belly... Unfortunately or fortunately my face can't hide my distaste for random ppl touching me....so they quickly stopped...so no real suggestions, but I do feel your pain!!!
 My face is the same way - Hopeuflly that will be enough !!
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| Posted 11/18/08 3:02 PM |
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pickles16
Real Estate Professional
Member since 11/07 17227 total posts
Name:
Jen
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Re: Is it really evil of me to be dreading the Holidays?
Posted by MarisaK
Posted by pickles16
I totally feel you, I saw a bunch of DH's side on Rosh Hashana this year, and haven't seen them in a while and they were all over my belly... Unfortunately or fortunately my face can't hide my distaste for random ppl touching me....so they quickly stopped...so no real suggestions, but I do feel your pain!!!
My face is the same way - Hopeuflly that will be enough !!
LOL, DH always tells me I can't hide my phoniness..and believe me my look could have scared away rabid dogs....
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| Posted 11/18/08 3:08 PM |
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randella
Love my little man
Member since 8/05 16290 total posts
Name:
Randi
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Re: Is it really evil of me to be dreading the Holidays?
I hear ya sister!
I am so not a fan of people looking at me, checking me out or touching me. For everyone's sake-- they better leave me alone.
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| Posted 11/18/08 3:26 PM |
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randella
Love my little man
Member since 8/05 16290 total posts
Name:
Randi
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Re: Is it really evil of me to be dreading the Holidays?
I am the same way too... I wear my heart on my face-- what can I say??
This is why people think I am always giving dirty looks or am p!ssed off. Well, I guess most of the time I am!!
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| Posted 11/18/08 3:30 PM |
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Reese1106
Family of 4! :o)
Member since 8/06 6655 total posts
Name:
Theresa
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Re: Is it really evil of me to be dreading the Holidays?
I have a strict no touching policy when it comes to my pregnant belly. I think it's rude of someone to assume they can touch another person just because they are pregnant. Is it okay to touch a bald man's head because it's shiny? I think not. If a family member wants to touch my belly, they ask and if I'm not in the mood, I simply say no. It may come across as me being bitchy to some but it's my belly and my rules.
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| Posted 11/18/08 3:46 PM |
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pickles16
Real Estate Professional
Member since 11/07 17227 total posts
Name:
Jen
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Re: Is it really evil of me to be dreading the Holidays?
Posted by Reese1106
Is it okay to touch a bald man's head because it's shiny? I think not.
OMG, that was the best line EVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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| Posted 11/18/08 3:49 PM |
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pjay
YAY! I CAN WRITE HERE....
Member since 5/07 1551 total posts
Name:
PJAY
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Re: Is it really evil of me to be dreading the Holidays?
maybe wear a baggy shirt. i feel the only time people touch me is if i am showing my belly off.. u can also buy a cute shirt that says hands off the belly.....or something like that
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| Posted 11/18/08 3:50 PM |
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CkGm
They get so big, so fast :(
Member since 5/05 13848 total posts
Name:
Christine
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Re: Is it really evil of me to be dreading the Holidays?
Posted by Reese1106
I have a strict no touching policy when it comes to my pregnant belly. I think it's rude of someone to assume they can touch another person just because they are pregnant. Is it okay to touch a bald man's head because it's shiny? I think not. If a family member wants to touch my belly, they ask and if I'm not in the mood, I simply say no. It may come across as me being bitchy to some but it's my belly and my rules.
ITA- Its still my body and I ask people to respect that. My BIL is a big belly toucher too and its so annoying.
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| Posted 11/18/08 4:42 PM |
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kerrycec03
Mom of 2 beautiful boys!!
Member since 6/06 13519 total posts
Name:
Kerry
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Re: Is it really evil of me to be dreading the Holidays?
I know it bothers some people. Personally, as I say, this is the first time in my life I have a firm stomach so touch away
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| Posted 11/18/08 4:54 PM |
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kmac
Two under two!
Member since 5/07 3703 total posts
Name:
Kris
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Re: Is it really evil of me to be dreading the Holidays?
I hear ya...I do not want hands all over the belly or sizing me up...everytime I see my brother-in-laws mother she asks me how much I've gained so far.
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| Posted 11/18/08 5:26 PM |
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SweetTooth
I'm a tired mommy!
Member since 12/05 20105 total posts
Name:
Lauren
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Re: Is it really evil of me to be dreading the Holidays?
Maybe you should get a t-shirt that says don't touch my belly!
In all honesty, why don't you be up front and tell them all you don't feel comfortable with people touching you?
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| Posted 11/18/08 5:32 PM |
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hmm8191
My loves
Member since 3/06 2908 total posts
Name:
Heather
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Re: Is it really evil of me to be dreading the Holidays?
I'd suggest wearing something loose fitting too. It won't keep them all away but it might limit the number of molestations you have to endure.
Good luck!!
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| Posted 11/18/08 5:34 PM |
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Lucky09
2017!
Member since 1/06 7537 total posts
Name:
DW
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Re: Is it really evil of me to be dreading the Holidays?
I hear you too. DH's aunt insists on rubbing my belly. I take a step backwards everytime she comes near me!
My neighbor's DH also asked me if he could feel the baby kick.
I just don't really get the obsession and it drives me nuts!!
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| Posted 11/18/08 6:06 PM |
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Goobster
:)
Member since 5/07 27557 total posts
Name:
:)
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Re: Is it really evil of me to be dreading the Holidays?
Posted by Lucky09
I hear you too. DH's aunt insists on rubbing my belly. I take a step backwards everytime she comes near me!
My neighbor's DH also asked me if he could feel the baby kick.
I just don't really get the obsession and it drives me nuts!!
I actually thought I might feel this way. I was surprised to see that I don't really feel this way...shocked at myself. Dh's family from OOS saw us for the first time last week and I was PAWED at all night, no joke. They are not usually like this. His cousin's wife walked over to me and literally flicked my boob (implying I got bigger but honestly, I didn't and I told her that).  Dh and I were shocked but it didn't make me flip out for some reason. They were grabbing my belly all night, rubbing it, commenting how great I looked, how nice I was carrying etc. MIL even commmented how it would have bothered her but for some reason I could just feel their happiness for us, and their love for our baby and all my prior issues with belly being touched and my anguish melted away. I actually have to say, I shockingly appreciated their affection.
On my side, I thought I would get more hands but I didn't. My mom and my aunt put their hands on my belly alot. My aunt stood behind me at my shower and was literally rubbing my belly from behind like FOREVER as I had a conversation with someone. It took me back a bit but I just let her do it. She never had children and she is just so happy for us and the upcoming baby that I have learned to just accept the hands on me...and find the way to see the good in it.
Not saying that anyone at all should feel the way I do. I don't blame ANYONE who doesn't appreciate it at all, as I thought I would not either. Just sharing my story about how I thought I would feel this way, as someone with space issues! But that I literally could have never predicted it would not even bother me at all when it happens. As for suggestions on how to suck it up and deal, other than remind yourself they are simply ecstatic for you and DH, I don't know if you can make yourself be ok with your personal space being invaded. It's probably not something you can just deal with and they should respect your space issues. 
Message edited 11/19/2008 2:48:50 AM.
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| Posted 11/18/08 6:24 PM |
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staceyd
LIF Adult
Member since 8/08 2052 total posts
Name:
stacey
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Re: Is it really evil of me to be dreading the Holidays?
Posted by SweetTooth
Maybe you should get a t-shirt that says don't touch my belly!
In all honesty, why don't you be up front and tell them all you don't feel comfortable with people touching you?
I feel like the OP... And I know in my position, I would feel utterly rude telling them I dont like them touching my belly.. i think they would be offended... I just hope its not as bad as I think it is going to be... I will be 20 weeks, and I havent really popped yet... I know christmas will be much worse... not looking forward to that...
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| Posted 11/18/08 7:12 PM |
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MsMBV
:P
Member since 5/05 28602 total posts
Name:
Me
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Re: Is it really evil of me to be dreading the Holidays?
Posted by pickles16
Unfortunately or fortunately my face can't hide my distaste for random ppl touching me....so they quickly stopped...so no real suggestions, but I do feel your pain!!!
Same here.... I find that if I walk around with a big FU face on and my arms crossed they don't even try it.
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| Posted 11/18/08 7:14 PM |
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