Re: Moms with 2+ kids - share your wisdom please

Breathe.

You should already have the confidence that you can do this since already being a mother. Throw all the rules out, the second is usually different in different ways and might present new challenges on you as a mother.

Just breathe and cherish the moments, it goes faster the second time! :)

Re: Moms with 2+ kids - share your wisdom please

ALWAYS tend to your oldest first when both are fighting for your attention. A newborn will not know the difference, but a toddler will not forget you chose to help the baby first.

When I had #2, each night after #1 was in bed, I would go right up to my bathroom and take a nice hot bath. It kept me sane and kinda gave me a second wind to deal with the nightime wakings.

Have your DH help as much as possible despite your natural mommy instinct to want to do everything.

Most importantly, remember to give your first born the same or even more attention. Plan to do something special once a week if you can...like a Sat afternoon trip to McDonalds for 30 minutes, while your DH takes care of the baby. It will make a world of difference.

Good luck!

Re: Moms with 2+ kids - share your wisdom please

Definately have Child #1 involved. DS helps me with everything with DD.

Have a gift for Child #1 from the new baby when they come up to the hospital.

Always make time for Child #1.

Re: Moms with 2+ kids - share your wisdom please

A big one for me...

Ava is very curious and always wants to help out.

We put a lock high up on the outside of the baby's bedroom door.

I was soo afraid of her wanting to be "helpful" by going in to get him in the middle of the night.

Re: Moms with 2+ kids - share your wisdom please

Since #2 was a surprise I really tired to not get worked up or listen when people said it was going to be hard. I knew if I did listen it would work me up and I would feel defeated when something didn't go right.
There were days I sobbed ( like the first time I had to try and figure out how to get down stairs with a 15 month old and newborn, first I cried and then the 3 of us went down on our behinds). I was really lucky that DD was such an easy baby that it made it easy for me to tend to DS when he needed me.
Definitely keep him on his schedule because it will be really hard to get him back to it. If anything I would try and get DS#2 onto Jack's schedule. It will make your life a lot easier.
If you feel overwhelmed, feel that emotion then snap out of it. If you let it get to you it will stress you and everyone else out in the family.

Now, this piece may sound a bit odd and maybe it's because I had/have no help (well I did for the first 10 days), but try not to have people help you with every little thing after the first 2 weeks. YOU are the one that is going to be with these 2 everyday all day. So the sooner you figure out how to do things on your own the easier it will be.

You will be fine and try not to worry

Re: Moms with 2+ kids - share your wisdom please

Always make time for dc#1
Always make time for dc#2
Always make time for you and your dh
Always make time for yourself

Re: Moms with 2+ kids - share your wisdom please

Stock up on toilet paper!! Hee hee!

Seriously though stock up on everything you will need for the next month at the least!! Running out to get one or 2 things with 2 kids really stinks!!

Also I make a special date for each of my older children to do something only"big" kids can do!!:o)

You are going to do Great!!

Re: Moms with 2+ kids - share your wisdom please

Take at least as many pics of #2 as you did with #1. Most of us with siblings realize that our parents have tons of pics of #1, then half as many for #2, and half that for #3, etc....
You can take shortcuts for a lot of things that you learned with DC #1, but don't take shortcuts with photos.... (and make sure not all photos of #2 have #1 in them as well. Obviously a lot will, but make sure you have pics of #2 by themselves...)

They may not realize it now, but when they are older, they'll look back at the photos and notice who your "favorite" is.... you don't want to give a moody teenager any ammunition....

Re: Moms with 2+ kids - share your wisdom please

Posted by GoldenRod

Take at least as many pics of #2 as you did with #1. Most of us with siblings realize that our parents have tons of pics of #1, then half as many for #2, and half that for #3, etc....
You can take shortcuts for a lot of things that you learned with DC #1, but don't take shortcuts with photos.... (and make sure not all photos of #2 have #1 in them as well. Obviously a lot will, but make sure you have pics of #2 by themselves...)

They may not realize it now, but when they are older, they'll look back at the photos and notice who your "favorite" is.... you don't want to give a moody teenager any ammunition....