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My heart is broken (long...sorry)

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MrsRivera
2 under 2...whew!!

Member since 2/07

9876 total posts

Name:
Beth

My heart is broken (long...sorry)

Thanks for your responses. I tried to tell the "short" version of the story, but I think the stuff I left out is what makes this situation so awful.

Thanks anyway. Chat Icon

Message edited 6/1/2008 7:04:10 PM.

Posted 6/1/08 12:46 PM
 
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KateDevine
*

Member since 6/06

24950 total posts

Name:

Re: My heart is broken (long...sorry)

Ok, I KNOW you are upset and you have every right to be upset...but it her life and her family. Unfortunately, she gets to make the choices as to what she thinks is best for them. She isn't doing anything to hurt them, just moving.

I know you are upset, but I don't think that there is much you can do without hurting your sister.Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 6/1/08 12:53 PM
 

Cookiegobbler
My little love bugs!!

Member since 9/05

5759 total posts

Name:
Nicole

Re: My heart is broken (long...sorry)

Unfortunately although I can understand why you are sad, I can also understand that your sister is doing what she thinks is best for her family at this time. So I don't think you have a right to be upset with her for that... you definitely have a right to be upset, just not at her...kwim? She probably saw how upset you were when she told you at first, so she was nervous about telling you that it was longer. Chat Icon

Posted 6/1/08 12:57 PM
 

Crismicka
How did I get so lucky

Member since 5/05

3725 total posts

Name:

Re: My heart is broken (long...sorry)

I am so sorry that you are hurting, but I have to agree with Nicole...If I knew I was hurting my sister, I would feel so terrible. I would not know what to do. I do think she was wrong for not being honest with you, but I understand what her head was probably going through when having to talk to you about her situation.Chat Icon

Posted 6/1/08 1:10 PM
 

JChia
Mom of 2 Princesses

Member since 9/07

2540 total posts

Name:
Jen

Re: My heart is broken (long...sorry)

I'm sorry you are in this situation. I agree that you shouldn't be too upset with your sister - Its her decision to make - and she probably wanted it to be just a year, but these kinds of deals change all the time, I don't think she blantantly lied to you about the time- the deal from her company just changed during negotiations. Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 6/1/08 1:24 PM
 

Ladybug63
Ohh... baby

Member since 5/06

2527 total posts

Name:
D

Re: My heart is broken (long...sorry)

Posted by KateDevine

Ok, I KNOW you are upset and you have every right to be upset...but it her life and her family. Unfortunately, she gets to make the choices as to what she thinks is best for them. She isn't doing anything to hurt them, just moving.

I know you are upset, but I don't think that there is much you can do without hurting your sister.Chat Icon Chat Icon



i'm sorry but I have to agree.

my entire family moved to Florida the year before I got married. it was really hard and I still hate how far away they are.
My sister is on #3 and with the timing we missed or will miss each others
kids 1st B-Days.
I was upset but it was best for her & her family. She has no obligation to me but certainly has one to her husband & her children!

Just think now you will have a free place to stay in CA for vacation!

We visit 4x's a year and have a blast!

i'm actually looking forward to my father moving from SC to WA. Now I'll have an excuse to vacation in Seattle!

Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 6/1/08 1:37 PM
 

Superkat
More a stranger than a friend

Member since 5/06

9730 total posts

Name:
K

Re: My heart is broken (long...sorry)

Posted by KateDevine

Ok, I KNOW you are upset and you have every right to be upset...but it her life and her family. Unfortunately, she gets to make the choices as to what she thinks is best for them. She isn't doing anything to hurt them, just moving.

I know you are upset, but I don't think that there is much you can do without hurting your sister.Chat Icon Chat Icon



I agree completely. The sister is doing what is right for her and her family. While it isn't easy for you, it is her life and you need to respect that. Chat Icon

Posted 6/1/08 1:42 PM
 

MrsRivera
2 under 2...whew!!

Member since 2/07

9876 total posts

Name:
Beth

Re: My heart is broken (long...sorry)

.

Message edited 6/1/2008 7:04:34 PM.

Posted 6/1/08 2:25 PM
 

KateDevine
*

Member since 6/06

24950 total posts

Name:

Re: My heart is broken (long...sorry)

Posted by MrsRivera

I just think she's being very selfish, and for a few reasons:

1. Everyone thinks that the schools here in NC are "behind" everyone else. As a teacher, I can tell you that the schools in our area are top-notch. I'm worried about my nephew academically, because he is already struggling in reading. I have had children who have moved more than once during their school career, and it definitely takes a toll.

2. My sister's DH has parents who are in their mid-80s. They moved here because they wanted to be close to their son and their grandchildren for their "last few years". Now they are leaving, and in their wake, they are leaving his elderly parents for two years--which could be their LAST two years (one of them is in failing health).

3. My sister is loaded. No joke. She could stay HERE and retire in a few years.

I know it's her life, and I have no say in it...and that's fine. But I'm worried about her kids.



All of those things are valid concerns, for HER. Unfortunately, you cannot make choices for her.

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Posted 6/1/08 2:27 PM
 

Diana1215
Living on a prayer!!!

Member since 10/05

29450 total posts

Name:
Diana

Re: My heart is broken (long...sorry)

It def. stinks that they are moving away but I'm sure she's doing what she thinks is best for her family.

Will they be moving back after the two years?

Posted 6/1/08 3:08 PM
 

nrthshgrl
It goes fast. Pay attention.

Member since 7/05

57538 total posts

Name:

Re: My heart is broken (long...sorry)

I don't think she's being selfish. I think it's a decision she made for her career & for her family.

I think it would be selfish of her (not immediate) family to stiffle her aspirations for their own benefit.

Kids adjust to moves. Your nephew will adjust & may even thrive there.

She should have been truthful. I could see why you're hurting. But don't take her career growth as a personal affront.
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Posted 6/1/08 6:02 PM
 

jules
Changing everyday

Member since 1/08

2281 total posts

Name:
julia

Re: My heart is broken (long...sorry)

Sorry i have to agree with PP, i think your sister and her DH are the ones that make the decisions for their family and i don't think anyone has the right to criticize or interfere with that.

TO me you just sound hurt and sad that your sister is leaving. And that is TOTALLY understandable. But you can't interfere in her life by coming up with reasons for her to stay that are kinda FAR fetched.

Enjoy the time you have left with her and wish her and her family well. Hopefully she will be back in 2 years. Time flies!

ETA...i would have lied to you too. Only because i wouldn't want to hurt you and because i wouldn't want to hear all of what you said in this post JMHO

Message edited 6/1/2008 6:08:38 PM.

Posted 6/1/08 6:05 PM
 

Janice
Sweet Jessie Quinn

Member since 5/05

27567 total posts

Name:
Janice

Re: My heart is broken (long...sorry)

I am sorry you are hurt, but it sounds like an opportunity of a lifetime to go and live on the west coast for 2 years.

Her boys will get to experience that.

As much as we would love family to follow us to NC, I can't handle the thought of living in one place for the long haul. Life is about living, and it sounds like your sister feels its a great thing for her family.

My heart is currently broken. My pregnant sister lives in a rain forest in washington state. We were all fine with her travels till she announced she was pregnant. It seems like another world away, but it makes her happy and she only has one life to live.

Posted 6/1/08 6:16 PM
 
 

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