My "I-finally-got-a-BFP" story!

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Thinking positive thoughts!

My "I-finally-got-a-BFP" story!

I hope that my story gives someone out there, who has been trying a long time, a little hope.

On Monday morning, Feb. 27, after trying for a year and a half, I finally got to see what those two beautiful pink lines look like!

I'm just entering my second trimester now, and starting to relax a little, but I’m still in shock and a little afraid to let myself get too excited because I'm well aware of all the things that can go wrong. But we are so, SO happy. DH and I are walking around on a cloud!

Getting to look into DH’s eyes and say the words “I’m pregnant” was a moment I will never, ever forget. After so many months of seeing the pain and disappointment on his face every time I told him my period had arrived. To tell him we finally did it and watch the news wash over him and see all the emotion and joy on his face, was simply the best experience of my life to date.

Now the crazy/frustrating part: We had been trying for 18 cycles. The first six I used OPKs, the next 12 I temped and plotted my cycles on fertilityfriend.com. The 19th cycle I did NOTHING! and of course, that’s when it happened.

My membership had just ended on fertility friend and I was done—with all of it!
The emotions had taken a toll on both of us and I was becoming that scary person who couldn't handle someone else's baby news without going home and falling apart. I was starting to believe it was never going to happen for us. When we started trying, I was 34 and suddenly I was 36, still with no baby on the way.

I was coming to terms with the fact that this probably wasn’t going to happen for us naturally. We’d need to get science involved and I recently started the process of researching which RE we wanted to meet with. (I know this is an avenue I technically should have explored much sooner, but I just wasn’t ready to go there.) Anyway, I stopped temping and charting and for the first time in a really long time, I couldn't even tell you what CD I was on. I didn't care about cycle days, cervical fluid, ovulation pain, or timing… I had essentially let it all go. Our sex life returned to just being about us having fun. I was mentally done “trying.”

That’s when it happened.

I hate to give any credence to the whole “it will happen when you stop trying” thing because no words drove me more crazy than those while we were trying, but maybe there is something to the idea of letting it all go and just having sex!

I don’t know what to make of any of this. I’m just happy and grateful. And I hope my experience gives someone out there struggling with the same feelings I was having, a little bit of hope.

Oh, and just for fun, here are my BFP pics!
First test was an internet cheapie.
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I saw the faint line on the internet cheapie and even though I knew the whole "a line is a line" thing it still didn't seem definitive enough, so as soon as I got to work I went straight to Duane Reade and bought a First Response. And then tested every day for the next few days!

Posted 5/7/12 3:48 PM