Need career advice LONG

Please don't quote.

I must first preface this by saying I absolutely love the industry I work in (hospitality) and it's my dream career. That said, I'm in a bit of a predicament and would like some insight.

When I came back to my position in late November after my maternity leave, my office had underwent a major upheaval and "reorganization." I was moved into another position, had my pay lessened and moved to hourly versus salary, lost my commission, lost my 401k and essentially lost all my responsibility and title. It's been awful. I've been sticking it out in the hopes that things will go back to the way they were, because things are not working as is. I keep being assured by my manager that it will go back, I will get my old responsibility and title back, etc. the "perks" of this job is that I love my coworker and GM and we have flexibility in our schedules. Benefits are eh. It's about 30 mins from home. Also, there is no room for growth.

In the meantime, I've interviewed for two great opportunities. One is in Westhampton, about 45 minutes away, for a prominent location, but it would mostly be an administrative position. $10k more than I'm making, excellent benefits and commission package. Room to move and grow within the company in other properties. The other is a real career-changer - working for a prominent MLB stadium. Means an hour+ commute, but $20k more, excellent benefits and bonus plan, and he opportunity for real growth into senior level management. But It would absolutely be more stressful and fast paced.

My current job keeps messing my head- one minute they say I'm going back to my old position, the next day they say no, the next day yes. There is a clear lack of a plan and communication among senior management. My own coworker has been fighting for me all along the way, and she told them very candidly that if they don't make a change soon, they're going to lose me. And they would be really, really up shits creek if I left, given what we do. It would be a major scramble for them to cover my work when we enter our busy season soon. Yesterday, my GM told me things are definitely going back to my old position, and were going to have a discussion on Sunday as to what I want - hours, pay, etc. I'm SO burned by how things have played out here - it would would take a lot for me to want to stay, given that they violated FMLA guidelines when I came back from maternity and never made good on things we discussed when I brought it up to them. I would also need to resign myself to the fact that I probably won't ever move up to any higher position, because they're aren't any. I would need to be OK with the fact that I'll likely stay at my current pay scale indefinitely - I would need to rely on my commission to make extra.

Does anyone have any insight for me? Or advice on how to handle the discussion with my boss? Do I mention the other offers (the only offer on the table right now is Westhampton, the stadium deal is still being negotiated because I have another interview with the VP next week and want to be prepared to discuss the details further). My DH is totally on board and supports whichever opportunity I choose. We do have a 5 month old DS. I am really looking to take my career to the next level and make a name for myself - I'm afraid of being complacent and wondering if I could have done better. At what point do certain perks set you back, ya know?

Re: Need career advice LONG

I think according to your last paragraph, I would leave and go to the MLB job. At the end of the day, your DH supports you moving & you want room to grow and a successful career. It sounds like the MLB or the other job can do that for you. I would run far, far away from where you are now.

Re: Need career advice LONG

You need to leave your current job. They are jerking you around.

I would lean toward the Westhampton job. I'm sure you've heard this but your child will only be small for a short time. The stadium job sounds more demanding and time consuming, especially the commute.

I worked for the NYCDOE for 16 years and they treat teachers like garbage, but I put up with it. I also had a commute that was an hour under perfect conditions, which are rare. It's a huge regret now- I stayed till my daughter started kindergarten and then decided I had enough. Don't give your current employer any more of your valuable time than you have to, regardless of the career opportunity you choose.

Message edited 2/21/2014 9:56:52 AM.

Re: Need career advice LONG

I'm sorry that your current employer is making things such a mess for you. Understanding that you love your co-worker and GM, I know it would be hard to walk away but I would definitely leave. I look at it this way, if your GM cares about keeping you around, they will try to make it happen when you let them know you are leaving. They may see how serious you are and give you the option of a counter.

As far as the 2 opportunities you currently have, if I was in your position, I would most likely take the job in Westhampton. The MLB position sounds like a great opportunity but for me personally, the commute and more demanding and fast paced stress wouldn't be worth it for me especially with the added time for commuting. I worked in the Hamptons for 8 years and as much as the 45 minute commute annoyed me, I still preferred that drive compared to sitting on the train but again, that's just me. You still would have an increased income, room for growth and good benefits in Westhampton, with a shorter commute.

Good luck in whatever you decide. Having both of these options is a good problem to have!

Re: Need career advice LONG

I would leave your current job, it sounds very unstable... I would go with the Westhampton one, the commute/stress the MLB one would bring would not be worth it to me.

Need career advice LONG

i would leave the first job and i am not sure what i would do about which job to choose. I commuted for a year 2 plus hours each way it sucked but it was duable but i also had no kids.

in the long run you should choose what you want to see yourself really doing for long term and what you honestly think will make you happy when you have to get up and go to work.

Need career advice LONG

THe last paragraph means the most to me.

If your career means a lot and you want to keep it going then I would take the job with the most growth or potential for the growth.

Re: Need career advice LONG

Your post screams that it's time to move on.

Don't be afraid of change.

ETA: It also sounds like the Hamptons job would be a better fit for a mom.

Message edited 2/21/2014 8:39:12 PM.

Need career advice LONG

Honestly, I would leave your current job. If when you came back to work they really made all of those changes, that, in theory is illegal (if you were still on FMLA). They have to guarantee you the same (or similar job/position) at the same pay, hours, and benefits. They've been jerking you around and it's time to move on.

Need career advice LONG

Move on...theyre using you. I would take the West Hampton job where you would have good balance between work and family life. I wish you best of luck in whichever you choose!!

Re: Need career advice LONG

Re: Need career advice LONG

You have to assume that your current job is not changing. It sounds like your comfortable there, but not happy. If I were you, I'd pursue other avenues, especially bc you said your career is important.

Wait until you get offers, negotiate if you get multiple offers. Then decide.

Good luck. You will make the right decision for you.

Re: Need career advice LONG