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okay wait...what did i miss today?
whats with the locked post at the top of the board? can someone FM me?
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Posted 2/3/09 9:22 PM  |
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Long Island Weddings
Long Island's Largest Bridal Resource |
Diana1215
Living on a prayer!!!
Member since 10/05 29450 total posts
Name:
Diana
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Re: okay wait...what did i miss today?
I have no idea but you can fill me in when you find out.
I can't imagine posts being pulled from here - everyone is usually so helpful and great about everything.
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| Posted 2/3/09 10:11 PM |
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LiveAgain
Listen close....
Member since 8/07 3545 total posts
Name:
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Re: okay wait...what did i miss today?
I'm glad I'm not the only one who doesnt know whats going on. I know I havent posted much but I can't remember there ever being a time where anyone would get nasty
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| Posted 2/3/09 10:17 PM |
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jam11308
Member since 11/07 7273 total posts
Name:
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Re: okay wait...what did i miss today?
I was shocked to see that too...in the 10 months that I've been on this board it's been super friendly & helpful. It's a shame that a warning like that even needed to be posted 
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| Posted 2/3/09 10:24 PM |
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MrsPJB2007
MBA at your service!
Member since 7/06 12020 total posts
Name:
MJ
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Re: okay wait...what did i miss today?
i think the problem lately--is that people on this board have to realize that what works for one person, may not necessarily work for another...and therefore there is no such thing as just one opinion on things. everyone has their own path with TTC. and obviously with TTC we can all get sensitive with things, but its hard to remember that not everything is personal and sometimes people are just saying what they think works for them or what their doctors have recommended.
none of us are actual doctors and we're all just going by experiences....sometimes we forget that when talking to others about what they are doing for their fertility.
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| Posted 2/3/09 10:40 PM |
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Diana1215
Living on a prayer!!!
Member since 10/05 29450 total posts
Name:
Diana
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Re: okay wait...what did i miss today?
Posted by MrsPJB2007
i think the problem lately--is that people on this board have to realize that what works for one person, may not necessarily work for another...and therefore there is no such thing as just one opinion on things. everyone has their own path with TTC. and obviously with TTC we can all get sensitive with things, but its hard to remember that not everything is personal and sometimes people are just saying what they think works for them or what their doctors have recommended.
none of us are actual doctors and we're all just going by experiences....sometimes we forget that when talking to others about what they are doing for their fertility.
ITA that no one here is a doctor and you should always go by what your doctor says but I think that the more information you receive the better. There are so many things about TTC that we don't know that I truly feel that I learn something new everyday from all of you ladies! 
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| Posted 2/4/09 8:53 AM |
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MRSBA
LIF Adult
Member since 9/08 923 total posts
Name:
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Re: okay wait...what did i miss today?
Posted by MrsPJB2007
i think the problem lately--is that people on this board have to realize that what works for one person, may not necessarily work for another...and therefore there is no such thing as just one opinion on things. everyone has their own path with TTC. and obviously with TTC we can all get sensitive with things, but its hard to remember that not everything is personal and sometimes people are just saying what they think works for them or what their doctors have recommended.
none of us are actual doctors and we're all just going by experiences....sometimes we forget that when talking to others about what they are doing for their fertility.
 I really don't think that has to do with the top post. I think people here are VERY aware that they aren't doctors. I just think some people love drama more than others....and it's just sad that it hits the TTC board....
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| Posted 2/4/09 9:17 AM |
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lolipep
My prayers have been answered
Member since 10/08 3642 total posts
Name:
Lori
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Re: okay wait...what did i miss today?
Posted by MRSBA
Posted by MrsPJB2007
i think the problem lately--is that people on this board have to realize that what works for one person, may not necessarily work for another...and therefore there is no such thing as just one opinion on things. everyone has their own path with TTC. and obviously with TTC we can all get sensitive with things, but its hard to remember that not everything is personal and sometimes people are just saying what they think works for them or what their doctors have recommended.
none of us are actual doctors and we're all just going by experiences....sometimes we forget that when talking to others about what they are doing for their fertility.
I really don't think that has to do with the top post. I think people here are VERY aware that they aren't doctors. I just think some people love drama more than others....and it's just sad that it hits the TTC board....
I don't think people like drama -and yes people know they are not Dr.'s -we come on here to get support and advice from eachother and I think people are just going by their experiences-that is really all they can go by. It's obvious you should listen to your dr. since they know you best. and ITA that it's sad that it's on this board.
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| Posted 2/4/09 9:24 AM |
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Diana1215
Living on a prayer!!!
Member since 10/05 29450 total posts
Name:
Diana
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Re: okay wait...what did i miss today?
I also would like to say that my cousin who has been TTC for years now - and done 6 IVFs actually knew more then her doctors did. In certain cases you have to be your own advocate and fight for what you know is best. She did all of her research and presented things to her doctors. To alot of these doctors we are just another patient - KWIM and they don't always know everything.
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| Posted 2/4/09 9:33 AM |
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lolipep
My prayers have been answered
Member since 10/08 3642 total posts
Name:
Lori
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Re: okay wait...what did i miss today?
Posted by Diana1215
I also would like to say that my cousin who has been TTC for years now - and done 6 IVFs actually knew more then her doctors did. In certain cases you have to be your own advocate and fight for what you know is best. She did all of her research and presented things to her doctors. To alot of these doctors we are just another patient - KWIM and they don't always know everything.
That sadly is very true.
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| Posted 2/4/09 9:35 AM |
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diva7531
My Peanut
Member since 2/07 5199 total posts
Name:
Ryan 3 boys EDD 11/6!
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Re: okay wait...what did i miss today?
I think Mellissa nailed it on the head. What works for some will not work for others. Basically, (from what I heard,not what I read, cause I missed it too) the word "relax" was used. For some people, this has worked and for some it is a VERY sensitive subject.
I think everyone needs to just calm down and remember what we are all here for: information, advice, shoulder to cry/vent on, and last but not least, SUPPORT. I think we should support someone whether they need IVF, timing or just to relax.
nuff said, I'll step down off of my soap box now.
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| Posted 2/4/09 9:47 AM |
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Linda1003
love my 2 boys
Member since 8/08 10923 total posts
Name:
Linda
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Re: okay wait...what did i miss today?
Im finding it very interesting that at one time everyone agreeed that telling a ttcer to "relax" was one of the worst things to say to someone.. Now all of a sudden..it's ok. 
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| Posted 2/4/09 9:52 AM |
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4PsInaPod
My Loves <3
Member since 7/07 10079 total posts
Name:
D
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Re: okay wait...what did i miss today?
Posted by Linda1003
Im finding it very interesting that at one time everyone agreeed that telling a ttcer to "relax" was one of the worst things to say to someone.. Now all of a sudden..it's ok.
I don't think it was ever said it was OK, I think what people are trying to say is that drama shouldn't have been started by a few people sharing their experience.
Everyone here supports in there own way, we may not agree with them. It's a forum, if we all had the same way of looking at things, it would be boring.
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| Posted 2/4/09 9:57 AM |
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Linda1003
love my 2 boys
Member since 8/08 10923 total posts
Name:
Linda
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Re: okay wait...what did i miss today?
Posted by DPerotti
Posted by Linda1003
Im finding it very interesting that at one time everyone agreeed that telling a ttcer to "relax" was one of the worst things to say to someone.. Now all of a sudden..it's ok.
I don't think it was ever said it was OK, I think what people are trying to say is that drama shouldn't have been started by a few people sharing their experience.
Everyone here supports in there own way, we may not agree with them. It's a forum, if we all had the same way of looking at things, it would be boring.
There was no drama in the begining..It when people got defensive about it that it turned into drama.
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| Posted 2/4/09 9:58 AM |
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MrsPJB2007
MBA at your service!
Member since 7/06 12020 total posts
Name:
MJ
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Re: okay wait...what did i miss today?
Posted by Diana1215
I also would like to say that my cousin who has been TTC for years now - and done 6 IVFs actually knew more then her doctors did. In certain cases you have to be your own advocate and fight for what you know is best. She did all of her research and presented things to her doctors. To alot of these doctors we are just another patient - KWIM and they don't always know everything.
That really stinks about your cousin's experience. But I wasn't necessarily meaning the whole "we're not doctors" thing in this way. Maybe I didn't explain myself right.
I just meant that sometimes people post on here saying "Well I'm doing X, Y, and Z -- my doc went over this with me" and then people will post and say "Well I read it should be like THIS" or "Maybe you should go back to your Doctor and say THIS" -- while I do understand this site is about everyone sharing whats going on in their TTC journey, sometimes I think people forget that they do not know the poster's full history and story.
When people jump on a topic and say "it really should be done like this" -- its almost like they are saying they know better than the person's doctor does...and that is what I'm trying to reiterate. That what works for one person and their experience isn't necessarily the be all, end all of it...and there isn't just ONE way to handle things. That's what I mean when I said that we're not doctors on here.
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| Posted 2/4/09 10:00 AM |
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4PsInaPod
My Loves <3
Member since 7/07 10079 total posts
Name:
D
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Re: okay wait...what did i miss today?
There was no drama in the begining..It when people got defensive about it that it turned into drama.
exactly, when the old thread was bumped is when it began to take a downward spiral
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| Posted 2/4/09 10:02 AM |
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MRSBA
LIF Adult
Member since 9/08 923 total posts
Name:
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Re: okay wait...what did i miss today?
Posted by Linda1003
Im finding it very interesting that at one time everyone agreeed that telling a ttcer to "relax" was one of the worst things to say to someone.. Now all of a sudden..it's ok.
In an effort to help - there is still a post (which I did contribute to) which talks about the relaxing......I don't think it needs to be re-hashed.
in summary-
Some people believe that "relaxing" actually helped them get pregnant - others believe that although it may be that some get pregnant the month they relaxed the fact that they "relaxed" probably had less to do with the fact that they got pregnant and it had more to do with statistics....the longer you try - the more likely you are to be pregnant in the first year
I still find telling people to relax extremely condescending.....
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| Posted 2/4/09 10:04 AM |
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MRSBA
LIF Adult
Member since 9/08 923 total posts
Name:
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Re: okay wait...what did i miss today?
Posted by MrsPJB2007
Posted by Diana1215
I also would like to say that my cousin who has been TTC for years now - and done 6 IVFs actually knew more then her doctors did. In certain cases you have to be your own advocate and fight for what you know is best. She did all of her research and presented things to her doctors. To alot of these doctors we are just another patient - KWIM and they don't always know everything.
That really stinks about your cousin's experience. But I wasn't necessarily meaning the whole "we're not doctors" thing in this way. Maybe I didn't explain myself right.
I just meant that sometimes people post on here saying "Well I'm doing X, Y, and Z -- my doc went over this with me" and then people will post and say "Well I read it should be like THIS" or "Maybe you should go back to your Doctor and say THIS" -- while I do understand this site is about everyone sharing whats going on in their TTC journey, sometimes I think people forget that they do not know the poster's full history and story.
When people jump on a topic and say "it really should be done like this" -- its almost like they are saying they know better than the person's doctor does...and that is what I'm trying to reiterate. That what works for one person and their experience isn't necessarily the be all, end all of it...and there isn't just ONE way to handle things. That's what I mean when I said that we're not doctors on here.
I don't know if this is pointed at me saying to hold off on the HSG - but my only point was that it was terribly painful for me and I wish that someone would have told me that because honestly I felt like my doctor rushed me into it - so I tried to give that information to the original poster...it IS a more invasive procedure and I would think that the poster would make their own decision based on what they research and what the dr says. But I still wish someone would have given me the advice to second guess having it done so early on.
Message edited 2/4/2009 10:09:15 AM.
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| Posted 2/4/09 10:07 AM |
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lolipep
My prayers have been answered
Member since 10/08 3642 total posts
Name:
Lori
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Re: okay wait...what did i miss today?
Posted by MrsPJB2007
Posted by Diana1215
I also would like to say that my cousin who has been TTC for years now - and done 6 IVFs actually knew more then her doctors did. In certain cases you have to be your own advocate and fight for what you know is best. She did all of her research and presented things to her doctors. To alot of these doctors we are just another patient - KWIM and they don't always know everything.
That really stinks about your cousin's experience. But I wasn't necessarily meaning the whole "we're not doctors" thing in this way. Maybe I didn't explain myself right.
I just meant that sometimes people post on here saying "Well I'm doing X, Y, and Z -- my doc went over this with me" and then people will post and say "Well I read it should be like THIS" or "Maybe you should go back to your Doctor and say THIS" -- while I do understand this site is about everyone sharing whats going on in their TTC journey, sometimes I think people forget that they do not know the poster's full history and story.
When people jump on a topic and say "it really should be done like this" -- its almost like they are saying they know better than the person's doctor does...and that is what I'm trying to reiterate. That what works for one person and their experience isn't necessarily the be all, end all of it...and there isn't just ONE way to handle things. That's what I mean when I said that we're not doctors on here.
I understand what you are saying but that being said everyone on here asks for eachothers opinions and people do just that and give it. I honestly don't believe that anyone is trying to force their experience on anyone else-nor do I believe that people think they know better than someone's Dr. People are just trying to be helpful, by giving their experiences it might help someone from going through something that maybe could be avoided.
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| Posted 2/4/09 10:08 AM |
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4PsInaPod
My Loves <3
Member since 7/07 10079 total posts
Name:
D
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Re: okay wait...what did i miss today?
Oye, let's not start out this morning on the wrong foot
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| Posted 2/4/09 10:09 AM |
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MrsPJB2007
MBA at your service!
Member since 7/06 12020 total posts
Name:
MJ
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Re: okay wait...what did i miss today?
Posted by MRSBA
I don't know if this is pointed at me saying to hold off on the HSG -.
Oh no--I wasn't talking about YOU specifically...I mean in general. Just with many posts and topics all around in the past few weeks around here.
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| Posted 2/4/09 10:10 AM |
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pinkandblue
Our family is complete, maybe
Member since 9/05 32436 total posts
Name:
Stephanie
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Re: okay wait...what did i miss today?
Posted by Diana1215
I also would like to say that my cousin who has been TTC for years now - and done 6 IVFs actually knew more then her doctors did. In certain cases you have to be your own advocate and fight for what you know is best. She did all of her research and presented things to her doctors. To alot of these doctors we are just another patient - KWIM and they don't always know everything.
I agree completely
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| Posted 2/4/09 10:11 AM |
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Diana1215
Living on a prayer!!!
Member since 10/05 29450 total posts
Name:
Diana
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Re: okay wait...what did i miss today?
I get what everyone is trying to say and I personally haven't seen anything being pushed on people - but - I spend most of my time of the Parenting board so I def. could have missed something along the way.
The way I am - I like to know EVERYTHING about anything. I want to know pros, cons, peoples experiences, why they did it that way etc. I feel as if it keeps me informed and almost one step ahead of the game.
Again, if anything was pushed upon anyone I don't think that is right -- I do think that everyone should feel free to post their opinions and experiences though -- that is truly the only way we will learn anything!
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| Posted 2/4/09 11:46 AM |
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Angel321
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Member since 4/08 15553 total posts
Name:
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Re: okay wait...what did i miss today?
just to clarify - the main problem occurred when some people shared what 'worked' for them and others took it as those people TELLING them what to do.
as Melissa said - this website is about shared experiences, no one is out to hurt anyone else. If some people shared that 'realxing or letting go' worked for them then good for them....there was no one saying to the original OP - you should relax, you should let go, you are freaking out and making it worse... Not one time was that even insinuated (or would it ever)....people were sharing what happened to them and others got insulted.
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| Posted 2/4/09 12:43 PM |
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