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over before it starts ?

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stoptime
LIF Infant

Member since 9/13

59 total posts

Name:

over before it starts ?

So we finally had our first consult. We went to LI IVF and met with Dr. Brenner. He advised me that even though my FSH is borderline high (not awful), because of my age, he wouldn't waste his time on anything but donor eggs.

He said he "might" consider one IUI cycle if I was set on it just to "get it out of my system."

DE is not something that DH and I ever discussed and it's not something that we can just jump right into - the cost alone is Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

We are meeting with Dr. Stelling and Dr. Kang next week.

I didn't like the way without knowing how I would respond to any stims, LI IVF wanted to push me right into DE.

As of right now, DH and I have decided that DE are not an option for us. Financially it's just not really do-able and we both feel like if that's the only way to achieve a pregnancy, we need to take it as a sign that maybe it's not meant to be. Chat Icon

Posted 2/20/14 2:42 PM
 
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Lillies
Grateful for my babies!

Member since 2/12

4571 total posts

Name:
<3

Re: over before it starts ?

Brenner is infamous for pushing DE's with DOR. There are many other Drs who are willing to get you pregnant on your eggs before going that route. Stelling is excellent and I currently see Dr. Tortoriello at SIRM who only considers DE's as last resort.

Posted 2/20/14 2:49 PM
 

stoptime
LIF Infant

Member since 9/13

59 total posts

Name:

Re: over before it starts ?

Thanks for this. I am going to check out SIRM and add them to my list of consultations!

Posted 2/20/14 2:53 PM
 

Sunny10
LIF Adult

Member since 10/10

1287 total posts

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Re: over before it starts ?

Posted by Lillies

Brenner is infamous for pushing DE's with DOR. There are many other Drs who are willing to get you pregnant on your eggs before going that route. Stelling is excellent and I currently see Dr. Tortoriello at SIRM who only considers DE's as last resort.



100% agree. Brenner was the most negative dr I encountered and this is before spending any time on treatment. I ran so fast from him....

Depending on your age, if you are older, I would recommend Dr. Kang that you have on your list. She is with Cornell and they take a lot of older women.

Message edited 2/20/2014 3:28:11 PM.

Posted 2/20/14 3:23 PM
 

stoptime
LIF Infant

Member since 9/13

59 total posts

Name:

Re: over before it starts ?

DH and I are definitely older, and I know the odds are against us, but I would like to at least try with my own eggs before we decide if we are going to go any further.

Posted 2/20/14 3:42 PM
 

hazel2
LIF Infant

Member since 5/13

346 total posts

Name:

Re: over before it starts ?

I know exactly how you feel. I am over 40 and I just did my 1st IVF thru LIIVF. They brought up DE to us too, and we decided against it and wanted to try with my own eggs. I responded well and they did get 10 embryos from me. I say go for it. See how you respond to the stim meds and go from there. Once we decided against DE we put it out of our minds, as if it wasn't even an option and I focused on what we can afford and can do. If that makes sense.

Good luck to you! Chat Icon

Message edited 2/20/2014 3:44:23 PM.

Posted 2/20/14 3:43 PM
 

MrsM0829
... With a cherry on top!!!

Member since 11/09

1332 total posts

Name:

Re: over before it starts ?

Don't give up hope based on your first consult. The first RE we met with was very negative, which is why he's not our RE. I'm 38, have a high FSH and low AMH. My dr suggested we try a cycle with my eggs before even considering donor eggs. She felt that while my eggs may be a problem, there was no harm in trying since there was no indication that I'd have a problem becoming pregnant with DE down the road. Good luck!

Posted 2/20/14 3:48 PM
 

stoptime
LIF Infant

Member since 9/13

59 total posts

Name:

Re: over before it starts ?

Thanks for the positive thinking ladies!!! We are in our 40's. I've read the statistics, and I understand that the odds of getting pregnant are low.

I just keep telling myself that someone has to be the one who gets the positive result!

Posted 2/20/14 3:57 PM
 

hazel2
LIF Infant

Member since 5/13

346 total posts

Name:

Re: over before it starts ?

You are right! We have to try at least right? don't give up hope, I know it's hard when you read all the statistics (I do it too) but there are also so many success stories Chat Icon

Posted 2/20/14 4:06 PM
 

PitterPatter11
Baby Boy is Here!

Member since 5/11

7619 total posts

Name:
Momma <3

over before it starts ?

I would definitely try to use your own eggs for at least one cycle to see how things go and then base future decisions off that cycle. While our IF issue was the opposite of yours (severe MFI - azoospermia due to chemotherapy), we had a similar situation where my DH's urologist was more or less like "if you want to have a family, you will need to use donor sperm." Needless to say, I am now pregnant and we did not use donor sperm.

Best of luck!

Posted 2/20/14 4:16 PM
 

MrsM84
LIF Adult

Member since 2/13

2352 total posts

Name:

over before it starts ?

Try to stay positive! Though some doctors get rave reviews on this board, to each his own! There will be a doctor that you feel comfortable with and you will know when you meet them (like how you knew Dr. Brenner wasn't the one for you!) Keep exploring your options! Good things come to those that wait! Sending you positive energy and happy thoughts!

Posted 2/20/14 5:19 PM
 

JoanneAndJustin
LIF Adult

Member since 2/09

1801 total posts

Name:
Joanne

over before it starts ?

I didn't see Dr Brenner for this reason. I was 38 when I got pregnant, literally weeks before my 39th birthday. My own RE, Dr Zapantis, encouraged using my own eggs first. We got pregnant with our second IVF.

Posted 2/20/14 6:39 PM
 

GoodThoughts
Dreams do come true

Member since 2/12

2259 total posts

Name:

Re: over before it starts ?

See someone else.

I am 39. FSH = 9.8 AMH - .24
My most recent IVF cycle was the best cycle I've ever had (I have a DD from IVF when I was 37). They retrieved 15 follicles. 11 were mature. 8 fertilized (we're dealing with male factor in addition to my issues). We transferred 2 embryos and froze 3 (I never had anything to freeze in the past). I am 13 weeks pregnant as a result of that cycle.

If you're considering Cornell, Dr. Owen Davis is the AMA/DOR guru. We consulted with him, but didn't go with Cornell.

Posted 2/20/14 6:43 PM
 

cowgirlkate
Twins times TWO!

Member since 1/11

1197 total posts

Name:

Re: over before it starts ?

I agree!!! You have to at least try with yours first I think.

Chat Icon

Posted 2/21/14 10:57 AM
 

babydreams21
LIF Adult

Member since 12/12

3656 total posts

Name:

over before it starts ?

Make more consults! I feel like you have to try at least once with your own eggs. You may respond well to stims. Go to someone who won't jump to donor eggs immediately. GL

Message edited 2/21/2014 12:19:38 PM.

Posted 2/21/14 12:18 PM
 

MrsGoldie
<3 Miracles can happen <3

Member since 9/12

1700 total posts

Name:
R

Re: over before it starts ?

I agree with the prev posters. Don't give up yet! You should try a few medicated cycles first to see how you respond to meds. A couple more consults won't hurt either. Good Luck Chat Icon

Posted by GoodThoughts

See someone else.

I am 39. FSH = 9.8 AMH - .24
My most recent IVF cycle was the best cycle I've ever had (I have a DD from IVF when I was 37). They retrieved 15 follicles. 11 were mature. 8 fertilized (we're dealing with male factor in addition to my issues). We transferred 2 embryos and froze 3 (I never had anything to freeze in the past). I am 13 weeks pregnant as a result of that cycle.

If you're considering Cornell, Dr. Owen Davis is the AMA/DOR guru. We consulted with him, but didn't go with Cornell.




Congratulations! If you don't mind me asking...was there anything different with the protocol that gave you your bfp, than your other protocols? Supplements?

Message edited 2/21/2014 12:44:17 PM.

Posted 2/21/14 12:43 PM
 

stoptime
LIF Infant

Member since 9/13

59 total posts

Name:

Re: over before it starts ?

Thanks ladies. As much as I've tried to stay away from looking at the dismal statistics, it appears that a few months or even a year won't really affect my ability to carry a pregnancy using donor eggs, so we are going to keep hoping that we will achieve a miracle via IVF.

Posted 2/21/14 1:10 PM
 

GoodThoughts
Dreams do come true

Member since 2/12

2259 total posts

Name:

Re: over before it starts ?

Posted by MrsGoldie

I agree with the prev posters. Don't give up yet! You should try a few medicated cycles first to see how you respond to meds. A couple more consults won't hurt either. Good Luck Chat Icon

Posted by GoodThoughts

See someone else.

I am 39. FSH = 9.8 AMH - .24
My most recent IVF cycle was the best cycle I've ever had (I have a DD from IVF when I was 37). They retrieved 15 follicles. 11 were mature. 8 fertilized (we're dealing with male factor in addition to my issues). We transferred 2 embryos and froze 3 (I never had anything to freeze in the past). I am 13 weeks pregnant as a result of that cycle.

If you're considering Cornell, Dr. Owen Davis is the AMA/DOR guru. We consulted with him, but didn't go with Cornell.




Congratulations! If you don't mind me asking...was there anything different with the protocol that gave you your bfp, than your other protocols? Supplements?



You have FM

Posted 2/21/14 5:24 PM
 

berkens506
LIF Infant

Member since 2/13

254 total posts

Name:

over before it starts ?

Try Dr. Christine Mullin. She is really great and has a very gentle demeanor.

Posted 2/24/14 8:02 AM
 
 

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