Overcoming Fears of losing loved ones...

How do you all do this?

Lately ( Post partum hormones Im sure) I have been so fearful of things happening to the ones I love.

It consumes me if I think about it for too long.

I get so terrified of the future b/c I know eventually we all have to die and its gonna happen and I dont know when or how to prepare for it.

I try NOT to think about it, but then is that good either?

I sometimes wish I could take everyone I love and live in a small cabin in the woods so we are all safe till our time comes. VERY silly, I know.

I dont want to live my life worrying.....

Re: Overcoming Fears of losing loved ones...

ur not alone in what u r feeling i felt this way for over a yr now since my grandma passed....i lost a lot of faith that there really is a life after all of this UNTIL i got read by a verrrrrrry cool medium and it might sound stupid but that got some of my faith back that in fact there is an afterlife....this is me and this might not be something ur open to or interested in but it helped me a lil....i do still get scared about the day my parents will go or my firefighter dh BUT all i can say is (and this is easier said than done) i TRY my hardest to just live my life to the fullest doing things that i want to do without overanalyzing everything (which i always do )

Re: Overcoming Fears of losing loved ones...

Posted by JenandMikey

ur not alone in what u r feeling i felt this way for over a yr now since my grandma passed....i lost a lot of faith that there really is a life after all of this UNTIL i got read by a verrrrrrry cool medium and it might sound stupid but that got some of my faith back that in fact there is an afterlife....this is me and this might not be something ur open to or interested in but it helped me a lil....i do still get scared about the day my parents will go or my firefighter dh BUT all i can say is (and this is easier said than done) i TRY my hardest to just live my life to the fullest doing things that i want to do without overanalyzing everything (which i always do )

Re: Overcoming Fears of losing loved ones...

What you're feeling is a really normal post-partum symptom. It's worse in the beginning, for the first year or so, but with time, it subsides. Though, never entirely. I think it's just something that happens once you have a baby - mortality is that much more palpable, and you start to fully realize all that you really have to lose in this life.

I try hard not to get consumed by it, and when I feel those kind of thoughts taking over, I try to spend some alone time with Alex, and really, really enjoy the moment.

Re: Overcoming Fears of losing loved ones...

Posted by dm24angel

Posted by JenandMikey

ur not alone in what u r feeling i felt this way for over a yr now since my grandma passed....i lost a lot of faith that there really is a life after all of this UNTIL i got read by a verrrrrrry cool medium and it might sound stupid but that got some of my faith back that in fact there is an afterlife....this is me and this might not be something ur open to or interested in but it helped me a lil....i do still get scared about the day my parents will go or my firefighter dh BUT all i can say is (and this is easier said than done) i TRY my hardest to just live my life to the fullest doing things that i want to do without overanalyzing everything (which i always do )

yes I believe in them and thankfully saw one myself after losing my Uncle and my faith was restored....

Its the feeling of "how will i survive without this person" that I thin of and get obsessive about....and worry so much and so unneccesarily about them...

Re: Overcoming Fears of losing loved ones...

Re: Overcoming Fears of losing loved ones...

very strange but ive had these fears when I was post partum as well. I had a overwhelming fear of losing my son or something happening to myself and my son never knowing his mother. All I can tell you is that as the hormones leave your system you should feel better.

Re: Overcoming Fears of losing loved ones...

I just posted about this; you aren't alone. I'm not sure what to tell you except always tell those you love how much you love them. Don't get angry or upset over petty things that won't or don't matter today, tomorrow, etc.....

Make every day a great one. My dad doesn't say, "Have a good day." He has always said, "MAKE it a great day."

Re: Overcoming Fears of losing loved ones...

Re: Overcoming Fears of losing loved ones...

You're not alone, after I had my DD I had these feelings as well, and they are still there but to a less extent now. However, I have also had two people in my life pass away suddenly at an early age in the past few years, and this has made me even more worried about something happening to my loved ones. But it also reminded me that nothing is guaranteed, and not to just live for the future but make each day count. If you worry all the time about death you won't be able to enjoy life.

Re: Overcoming Fears of losing loved ones...

Wow- amazing how I have been the same way for a little while now. I attributed it to my anxiety. I can't blame post partum, but I hear ya mama!

FM!

Re: Overcoming Fears of losing loved ones...

I am always like this, and I can't say it's post Partum, since I don't have kids. I am always worried something is bad is going to happen. I even get worried when phones ring, especially when its late at night, or early in the morning. It is not good to live with anxiety like this, but it is really hard to change.
In your case, if is probably the fact you just had a baby, and your whole world has changed. I am positive that my anxiety will get worse when I have kids.

Re: Overcoming Fears of losing loved ones...

I am going through the same phase. I have those thoughts about something or someone wanted to harm DS. That someone will run into us when we go for a stroller walk. Or that something will happen to DH especially since he works in the City.

I am sure it is temporary but I am also sure as a mom now, I will never stop worrying.

Re: Overcoming Fears of losing loved ones...

I can relate to how you are feeling. Two years ago a little girl in my school was killed in a drunk driving accident. That day really changed the way I look at life. It doesn't matter how old or young you are..we never know how much time we or our loved ones have left. So I try to live each day to the fullest, not let little things bother me, appreciate all the blessings I have, and let your loved ones know how much you love them.

Re: Overcoming Fears of losing loved ones...

I appreciate the stories, it makes me feel better that Im not crazy and alone and its a common fear.

I Wish we all could erase it...

Re: Overcoming Fears of losing loved ones...

I felt that way post-partum. I was overly paranoid about everything. It eventually went away, I'd say about 8 weeks post-partum.

Re: Overcoming Fears of losing loved ones...

You have so described me exactly!!!!!!

The only thing is, I was ALWAYS like this. Not only post partum..which stinks because I know it wont go away.

I am always scared of so much and this is my BIGGEST FEAR! I wish I could help but sometimes knowing your not alone helps a little in itself.

I feel like you. The times I feel the safest is when my entire family is here at the house...just laughing and playing games..all together. I wish it could be like that forever!

I know it seems silly but its a huge fear and its hard because its not something that can be written off as being insignificant.

Re: Overcoming Fears of losing loved ones...

Re: Overcoming Fears of losing loved ones...

these things pop into my head ALL the time. I try to just push them out quickly, reminding my self that there is no sense worrying about it, if its going to happen I cant do squat about it, so if it happens get upset then, dont worry about how/when/if you'll get upset.

Thats what works for me. BUt I can see how it could easliy snowball if I didnt consciously discard the thought right away

Re: Overcoming Fears of losing loved ones...

ive been talking to someone about this- it helps to speak to someone. you feel like your life is overconsumed with fear of impending doom...its usually brought out worse after a stresful event...that seems to heighten those feelings.

therapy has been a huge help for me.



im sorry you are feeling this way..

Message edited 7/24/2007 7:14:44 AM.

Re: Overcoming Fears of losing loved ones...

Just wanted to send you hugs and let you know I can relate