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PLEASE tell me they are KIDDING

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Pages: [1] 2

JenniferEver
The Disney Lady

Member since 5/05

18163 total posts

Name:
Jennifer

PLEASE tell me they are KIDDING

When i read this in the times last week I literally checked the date on the paper to make sure I hadn't time warped to April Fool's Day or something..

I know it's long, but make sure you get to the GOGGLES part....


September 29, 2006
2 Blintzes Only, and a Toast to Your Health

By CLYDE HABERMAN
Determined to make New Yorkers healthier, whether or not it’s what they want, the Bloomberg administration unveiled more regulations yesterday for restaurants and bars. These rules go beyond the smoking ban and the new attempt by City Hall to make cooking with artificial trans fats a thing of the past.

The latest ideas are only proposals for now. But if they become reality, they will change the way business is conducted at virtually every restaurant in the five boroughs.

Under one recommendation, diners will be required to chew their food for at least 12 seconds before swallowing. This new strategy recognizes that insufficiently chewed food can kill if it lodges in the throat, city officials said (agreeing to be interviewed only if granted anonymity because they feared being yelled at by higher-ups and because we, for our own reasons, chose to play along).

The officials acknowledged that enforcement of the 12-second rule — formally known as the Proper Mastication Initiative, or P.M.I. — would be difficult. But they said that steakhouses in particular would be closely watched by health inspectors, given that the risks of insufficient chewing are severe in those places.

As part of the P.M.I., waiters would be ordered to pay special attention to how customers cut their food.

A piece of steak, for example, may not be ingested if it is more than half an inch thick or longer than three-quarters of an inch on any side. Violators may be ordered to leave the restaurant.

To underline the hazards of unsafe dining, customers would also be required, before they are seated, to study the Heimlich maneuver posters that restaurants are supposed have on their walls.

A party of six or more may be seated right away, but the waiter must then bring a poster to the table and make sure that everyone reads it before he takes drink orders.

Speaking of drinks, another proposed rule would limit restaurantgoers to no more than two glasses of wine or two pints of beer with dinner. Only one glass or pint would be allowed if the customer had a premeal drink.

While experts have long recognized the beneficial effects of a little alcohol, thresholds must be established to ensure good health, the officials said.

Two drinks, they said, struck City Hall as a reasonable limit.

Other possible rules are being studied, the officials added.

Some Asian restaurants may be ordered to provide customers with goggles, a protective measure seen as especially necessary at sushi bars. Seating at the counter is often tightly packed.

It is all too easy, officials said, for a diner who gesticulates broadly in conversation to poke someone’s eye out with his chopsticks.

BECAUSE so many New Yorkers are overweight, other kinds of restrictions may be needed, the officials said.

One idea, governing dairy restaurants, would limit customers to two blintzes per order, instead of the three that are now the norm in many places.

Italian restaurants would be encouraged to serve only whole wheat pasta. As incentives, tax credits and cash bonuses might be offered, not unlike a recently announced administration plan to reward poor people for staying in school or keeping doctors’ appointments. Bars, too, might be given tax breaks if they expanded their stocks of low-calorie beers.

One controversial proposal would require restaurants to serve only decaffeinated coffee after 10 p.m. Caffeine consumed late at night is plainly not healthful. It leaves many people unable to get a good night’s sleep.

For much the same reason, no one over 50 would be served red meat after 9 p.m. “It’s for their own good,” one official said.

Predictably, after word of the new program leaked out, restaurant owners and their lobbyists objected, calling the proposals overly restrictive and potentially harmful to their businesses. Some of them threatened to take the mayor and the health commissioner to court.

Worried that lawsuits could delay their plans for a long time, city officials said last night that they were open to possible compromises.

To preserve the core of the Proper Mastication Initiative, they said, they were prepared to abandon the requirement that diners study the Heimlich maneuver posters.

That struck some political analysts as a sensible retreat. After all, they said, how much eat-your-peas governance can anyone take on an empty stomach?

Posted 10/2/06 11:50 AM
 
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Redhead
You Live, You Learn

Member since 5/05

31871 total posts

Name:
Jennifer

Re: PLEASE tell me they are KIDDING

W T H

Posted 10/2/06 11:52 AM
 

Shopaholic921
SUP..

Member since 10/05

5113 total posts

Name:
Brooke

Re: PLEASE tell me they are KIDDING

Posted by JenniferEver

When i read this in the times last week I literally checked the date on the paper to make sure I hadn't time warped to April Fool's Day or something..

I know it's long, but make sure you get to the GOGGLES part....


September 29, 2006
2 Blintzes Only, and a Toast to Your Health

By CLYDE HABERMAN
Determined to make New Yorkers healthier, whether or not it’s what they want, the Bloomberg administration unveiled more regulations yesterday for restaurants and bars. These rules go beyond the smoking ban and the new attempt by City Hall to make cooking with artificial trans fats a thing of the past.

The latest ideas are only proposals for now. But if they become reality, they will change the way business is conducted at virtually every restaurant in the five boroughs.

Under one recommendation, diners will be required to chew their food for at least 12 seconds before swallowing. This new strategy recognizes that insufficiently chewed food can kill if it lodges in the throat, city officials said (agreeing to be interviewed only if granted anonymity because they feared being yelled at by higher-ups and because we, for our own reasons, chose to play along).

The officials acknowledged that enforcement of the 12-second rule — formally known as the Proper Mastication Initiative, or P.M.I. — would be difficult. But they said that steakhouses in particular would be closely watched by health inspectors, given that the risks of insufficient chewing are severe in those places.


lol, so next to the salt and pepper shaker will be a timer?

Message edited 10/2/2006 11:52:54 AM.

Posted 10/2/06 11:52 AM
 

MsMBV
:P

Member since 5/05

28602 total posts

Name:
Me

Re: PLEASE tell me they are KIDDING

Posted by JenniferEver

When i read this in the times last week I literally checked the date on the paper to make sure I hadn't time warped to April Fool's Day or something..

I know it's long, but make sure you get to the GOGGLES part....



Where do I begin??? Policing chewing and cutting of food....placing mandatory limits on alcohol consumption that could be way below the DUI rate....GOGGLES FOR ASIAN RESTAURANTS? Whole wheat pasta only? What if I have a wheat allergy, can I NEVER AGAIN eat in an Italian restaurant.
I mean, why not ban red meat then- the most unhealthy item of all? Ah doesn't Bloomberg trade that commodity? Friggin hypocrite....

This is absurd. This is USA, not communist China. Someone smack the sh!t outta bloomberg. First no offices, then no smoking now this?
Land of the free my a$$Chat Icon

Posted 10/2/06 12:03 PM
 

~Colleen~
my loves...

Member since 5/05

9129 total posts

Name:
guess

Re: PLEASE tell me they are KIDDING

Where did you find this - it reads like something off the Onion. It cannot be for real!

Posted 10/2/06 12:05 PM
 

JenniferEver
The Disney Lady

Member since 5/05

18163 total posts

Name:
Jennifer

Re: PLEASE tell me they are KIDDING

I mean some of the concepts are good if modified

For example, they could make sure that the choking prevention signs are prominently displayed in the entrance area.
Or make signs or send out pamplets about proper chewing. But to have waiters police people?

They could encourage restaurants to OFFER whole wheat pasta.

The goggles just have me Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 10/2/06 12:06 PM
 

JenniferEver
The Disney Lady

Member since 5/05

18163 total posts

Name:
Jennifer

Re: PLEASE tell me they are KIDDING

Posted by Colleen9304

Where did you find this - it reads like something off the Onion. It cannot be for real!



It was on the front page of the NYT Metro section last week.
I just got a chance to post it.

Posted 10/2/06 12:07 PM
 

MsMBV
:P

Member since 5/05

28602 total posts

Name:
Me

Re: PLEASE tell me they are KIDDING

As someone who quit the bar industry very shortly after the smoking ban, these things do not have a positive affect on the industry. Tips are lower & customers feel like they are being treated like children. The wait & bar staff will suffer, as will the owners. If "policing" customers becomes the norm, people will feel rather uncomfortable when they eat. The last things most clients need is someone telling them what to do when they are out for a night, or to celebrate, etc. It is their time to get away from all the rules they follow all day. Tell me, would you look forward to happy hour if you were subject to the same rules, restrictions & "watching" that goes on all day long?

So stupid

Message edited 10/2/2006 12:11:42 PM.

Posted 10/2/06 12:08 PM
 

~Colleen~
my loves...

Member since 5/05

9129 total posts

Name:
guess

Re: PLEASE tell me they are KIDDING

You're kidding!

What does tight seating at a sushi bar have to do with needing protective eye-gear?!? Chat Icon Chat Icon

This all reads like a SNL skit.

Posted 10/2/06 12:09 PM
 

TreAnt427
-

Member since 8/06

8652 total posts

Name:
Tracy

Re: PLEASE tell me they are KIDDING

What the heck! I stopped at the goggles - this is crazy! Chat Icon

Posted 10/2/06 12:09 PM
 

JenniferEver
The Disney Lady

Member since 5/05

18163 total posts

Name:
Jennifer

Re: PLEASE tell me they are KIDDING

Posted by MsMBV

Posted by JenniferEver

When i read this in the times last week I literally checked the date on the paper to make sure I hadn't time warped to April Fool's Day or something..

I know it's long, but make sure you get to the GOGGLES part....



Where do I begin??? Policing chewing and cutting of food....placing mandatory limits on alcohol consumption that could be way below the DUI rate....GOGGLES FOR ASIAN RESTAURANTS? Whole wheat pasta only? What if I have a wheat allergy, can I NEVER AGAIN eat in an Italian restaurant.
I mean, why not ban red meat then- the most unhealthy item of all? Ah doesn't Bloomberg trade that commodity? Friggin hypocrite....

This is absurd. This is USA, not communist China. Someone smack the sh!t outta bloomberg. First no offices, then no smoking now this?
Land of the free my a$$Chat Icon



They did suggest not offering red meat to people over 50 after 9pm..I mean W T F

Isn't it my choice if I want to eat red meat, no matter how old I am? How do you know I'm not perfectly healthy?
They are going to start carding people for a burger!

And the coffee. I know my mom would murder someone if she couldn't have her coffee at night....

Posted 10/2/06 12:10 PM
 

JenniferEver
The Disney Lady

Member since 5/05

18163 total posts

Name:
Jennifer

Re: PLEASE tell me they are KIDDING

Posted by Colleen9304

You're kidding!

What does tight seating at a sushi bar have to do with needing protective eye-gear?!? Chat Icon Chat Icon

This all reads like a SNL skit.



I know, even the writing " they were afraid theyw ould be yelled at by higher ups"


Posted 10/2/06 12:11 PM
 

MsMBV
:P

Member since 5/05

28602 total posts

Name:
Me

Re: PLEASE tell me they are KIDDING

Posted by JenniferEver


And the coffee. I know my mom would murder someone if she couldn't have her coffee at night....




What about those people who work the graveyard shift???? You're telling me they can't have coffee before they go to work? totally absurd!

Posted 10/2/06 12:12 PM
 

anonttcer
BOOOO for fall!

Member since 7/06

10082 total posts

Name:
Meaning a NON ttcer!

Re: PLEASE tell me they are KIDDING

This smells like a Chat Icon

It's too out there to be for real!

Posted 10/2/06 12:13 PM
 

Christine
2nd verse same as the 1st

Member since 5/05

15287 total posts

Name:

Re: PLEASE tell me they are KIDDING

WOW! These are all such great ideas. Chat Icon I am sure everyone loves to be told what to eat, when and how when they go out for a meal. Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 10/2/06 12:13 PM
 

JenniferEver
The Disney Lady

Member since 5/05

18163 total posts

Name:
Jennifer

Re: PLEASE tell me they are KIDDING

Posted by anonttcer

This smells like a Chat Icon

It's too out there to be for real!



I swear it came from the Metro section. I saw it with my own two eyes. I read the NYT 7 days.

Here is thelink if you don't believe me

Posted 10/2/06 12:15 PM
 

LFitzy79
can hardly wait

Member since 5/05

2650 total posts

Name:
Lauren

Re: PLEASE tell me they are KIDDING

this is so bizarre???? they can't be serious.

Posted 10/2/06 12:16 PM
 

anonttcer
BOOOO for fall!

Member since 7/06

10082 total posts

Name:
Meaning a NON ttcer!

Re: PLEASE tell me they are KIDDING

Posted by JenniferEver

Posted by anonttcer

This smells like a Chat Icon

It's too out there to be for real!



I swear it came from the Metro section. I saw it with my own two eyes. I read the NYT 7 days.

Here is thelink if you don't believe me



Oh no I'm not saying that YOU made it up- but I feel like it's a joke or something!

Posted 10/2/06 12:16 PM
 

BabyAvocado
Happy New Year

Member since 5/05

17334 total posts

Name:

Re: PLEASE tell me they are KIDDING

I can't believe this if for real!! How stupid. Bloomberg - control freak much? Chat Icon

Posted 10/2/06 12:27 PM
 

JenniferEver
The Disney Lady

Member since 5/05

18163 total posts

Name:
Jennifer

Re: PLEASE tell me they are KIDDING

Posted by anonttcer

Posted by JenniferEver

Posted by anonttcer

This smells like a Chat Icon

It's too out there to be for real!



I swear it came from the Metro section. I saw it with my own two eyes. I read the NYT 7 days.

Here is thelink if you don't believe me



Oh no I'm not saying that YOU made it up- but I feel like it's a joke or something!



I know. I felt the same way!

Posted 10/2/06 12:28 PM
 

saraH
happy birthday sweet kate!

Member since 5/05

16555 total posts

Name:
I know that God exsists, I held her in my arms...

Re: PLEASE tell me they are KIDDING

the coffee thing is what is getting to me the most. how can they tell us that we cannot have caffine after 10 pm??

so ridiculous

Posted 10/2/06 12:32 PM
 

anonttcer
BOOOO for fall!

Member since 7/06

10082 total posts

Name:
Meaning a NON ttcer!

Re: PLEASE tell me they are KIDDING

Posted by BNL2005

the coffee thing is what is getting to me the most. how can they tell us that we cannot have caffine after 10 pm??

so ridiculous



See that is the thing- it is going to far to be for real.
If that was the case then cigarettes would be banned from being sold at all- because it is proven that they are bad for you.

Posted 10/2/06 12:33 PM
 

McSullivan
.

Member since 5/05

1573 total posts

Name:

Re: PLEASE tell me they are KIDDING

Posted by JenniferEver

When i read this in the times last week I literally checked the date on the paper to make sure I hadn't time warped to April Fool's Day or something..

I know it's long, but make sure you get to the GOGGLES part....


September 29, 2006
2 Blintzes Only, and a Toast to Your Health

By CLYDE HABERMAN
Determined to make New Yorkers healthier, whether or not it’s what they want, the Bloomberg administration unveiled more regulations yesterday for restaurants and bars. These rules go beyond the smoking ban and the new attempt by City Hall to make cooking with artificial trans fats a thing of the past.

The latest ideas are only proposals for now. But if they become reality, they will change the way business is conducted at virtually every restaurant in the five boroughs.

Under one recommendation, diners will be required to chew their food for at least 12 seconds before swallowing. This new strategy recognizes that insufficiently chewed food can kill if it lodges in the throat, city officials said (agreeing to be interviewed only if granted anonymity because they feared being yelled at by higher-ups and because we, for our own reasons, chose to play along).

The officials acknowledged that enforcement of the 12-second rule — formally known as the Proper Mastication Initiative, or P.M.I. — would be difficult. But they said that steakhouses in particular would be closely watched by health inspectors, given that the risks of insufficient chewing are severe in those places.

As part of the P.M.I., waiters would be ordered to pay special attention to how customers cut their food.

A piece of steak, for example, may not be ingested if it is more than half an inch thick or longer than three-quarters of an inch on any side. Violators may be ordered to leave the restaurant.

To underline the hazards of unsafe dining, customers would also be required, before they are seated, to study the Heimlich maneuver posters that restaurants are supposed have on their walls.

A party of six or more may be seated right away, but the waiter must then bring a poster to the table and make sure that everyone reads it before he takes drink orders.

Speaking of drinks, another proposed rule would limit restaurantgoers to no more than two glasses of wine or two pints of beer with dinner. Only one glass or pint would be allowed if the customer had a premeal drink.

While experts have long recognized the beneficial effects of a little alcohol, thresholds must be established to ensure good health, the officials said.

Two drinks, they said, struck City Hall as a reasonable limit.

Other possible rules are being studied, the officials added.

Some Asian restaurants may be ordered to provide customers with goggles, a protective measure seen as especially necessary at sushi bars. Seating at the counter is often tightly packed.

It is all too easy, officials said, for a diner who gesticulates broadly in conversation to poke someone’s eye out with his chopsticks.

BECAUSE so many New Yorkers are overweight, other kinds of restrictions may be needed, the officials said.

One idea, governing dairy restaurants, would limit customers to two blintzes per order, instead of the three that are now the norm in many places.

Italian restaurants would be encouraged to serve only whole wheat pasta. As incentives, tax credits and cash bonuses might be offered, not unlike a recently announced administration plan to reward poor people for staying in school or keeping doctors’ appointments. Bars, too, might be given tax breaks if they expanded their stocks of low-calorie beers.

One controversial proposal would require restaurants to serve only decaffeinated coffee after 10 p.m. Caffeine consumed late at night is plainly not healthful. It leaves many people unable to get a good night’s sleep.

For much the same reason, no one over 50 would be served red meat after 9 p.m. “It’s for their own good,” one official said.

Predictably, after word of the new program leaked out, restaurant owners and their lobbyists objected, calling the proposals overly restrictive and potentially harmful to their businesses. Some of them threatened to take the mayor and the health commissioner to court.

Worried that lawsuits could delay their plans for a long time, city officials said last night that they were open to possible compromises.

To preserve the core of the Proper Mastication Initiative, they said, they were prepared to abandon the requirement that diners study the Heimlich maneuver posters.

That struck some political analysts as a sensible retreat. After all, they said, how much eat-your-peas governance can anyone take on an empty stomach?



This has got to be some sort of satire or social commentary. There is no way that this is real!

Posted 10/2/06 12:42 PM
 

JenniferEver
The Disney Lady

Member since 5/05

18163 total posts

Name:
Jennifer

Re: PLEASE tell me they are KIDDING

Posted by McSullivan

Posted by JenniferEver

When i read this in the times last week I literally checked the date on the paper to make sure I hadn't time warped to April Fool's Day or something..

I know it's long, but make sure you get to the GOGGLES part....


September 29, 2006
2 Blintzes Only, and a Toast to Your Health

By CLYDE HABERMAN
Determined to make New Yorkers healthier, whether or not it’s what they want, the Bloomberg administration unveiled more regulations yesterday for restaurants and bars. These rules go beyond the smoking ban and the new attempt by City Hall to make cooking with artificial trans fats a thing of the past.

The latest ideas are only proposals for now. But if they become reality, they will change the way business is conducted at virtually every restaurant in the five boroughs.

Under one recommendation, diners will be required to chew their food for at least 12 seconds before swallowing. This new strategy recognizes that insufficiently chewed food can kill if it lodges in the throat, city officials said (agreeing to be interviewed only if granted anonymity because they feared being yelled at by higher-ups and because we, for our own reasons, chose to play along).

The officials acknowledged that enforcement of the 12-second rule — formally known as the Proper Mastication Initiative, or P.M.I. — would be difficult. But they said that steakhouses in particular would be closely watched by health inspectors, given that the risks of insufficient chewing are severe in those places.

As part of the P.M.I., waiters would be ordered to pay special attention to how customers cut their food.

A piece of steak, for example, may not be ingested if it is more than half an inch thick or longer than three-quarters of an inch on any side. Violators may be ordered to leave the restaurant.

To underline the hazards of unsafe dining, customers would also be required, before they are seated, to study the Heimlich maneuver posters that restaurants are supposed have on their walls.

A party of six or more may be seated right away, but the waiter must then bring a poster to the table and make sure that everyone reads it before he takes drink orders.

Speaking of drinks, another proposed rule would limit restaurantgoers to no more than two glasses of wine or two pints of beer with dinner. Only one glass or pint would be allowed if the customer had a premeal drink.

While experts have long recognized the beneficial effects of a little alcohol, thresholds must be established to ensure good health, the officials said.

Two drinks, they said, struck City Hall as a reasonable limit.

Other possible rules are being studied, the officials added.

Some Asian restaurants may be ordered to provide customers with goggles, a protective measure seen as especially necessary at sushi bars. Seating at the counter is often tightly packed.

It is all too easy, officials said, for a diner who gesticulates broadly in conversation to poke someone’s eye out with his chopsticks.

BECAUSE so many New Yorkers are overweight, other kinds of restrictions may be needed, the officials said.

One idea, governing dairy restaurants, would limit customers to two blintzes per order, instead of the three that are now the norm in many places.

Italian restaurants would be encouraged to serve only whole wheat pasta. As incentives, tax credits and cash bonuses might be offered, not unlike a recently announced administration plan to reward poor people for staying in school or keeping doctors’ appointments. Bars, too, might be given tax breaks if they expanded their stocks of low-calorie beers.

One controversial proposal would require restaurants to serve only decaffeinated coffee after 10 p.m. Caffeine consumed late at night is plainly not healthful. It leaves many people unable to get a good night’s sleep.

For much the same reason, no one over 50 would be served red meat after 9 p.m. “It’s for their own good,” one official said.

Predictably, after word of the new program leaked out, restaurant owners and their lobbyists objected, calling the proposals overly restrictive and potentially harmful to their businesses. Some of them threatened to take the mayor and the health commissioner to court.

Worried that lawsuits could delay their plans for a long time, city officials said last night that they were open to possible compromises.

To preserve the core of the Proper Mastication Initiative, they said, they were prepared to abandon the requirement that diners study the Heimlich maneuver posters.

That struck some political analysts as a sensible retreat. After all, they said, how much eat-your-peas governance can anyone take on an empty stomach?



This has got to be some sort of satire or social commentary. There is no way that this is real!



That's more plausible than it being real...

Maybe it's a commentary on what's next after the "trans fats" ban?

ETA: Clyde Haberman's columns are usually social commentary, but the way this is presented maked it look like a "real" article....

But the more I think about it, the more I think it has to be a joke...

I think it's a commentary on the trans fat ban...Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Message edited 10/2/2006 12:51:08 PM.

Posted 10/2/06 12:49 PM
 

evnme
My little lamb

Member since 8/05

12633 total posts

Name:
aka momma2b

Re: PLEASE tell me they are KIDDING

Chat Icon

Posted 10/2/06 1:17 PM
 
Pages: [1] 2
 

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