Question for those who went from FTWM to SAHM or PTWM...

Regarding finances, when you decided to stop working FT, did you feel like you needed to have a certain monthly income in order to be saving money, or, did you decide that being able to live life how you would like to right now was enough?

I keep going back and forth between what I want to do with my job situation, and to be honest, thinking about the future is what worries me the most...but such a big part of me keeps thinking that just being with dd more now would be worth more than any amount of money...

Thanks for your input!

Re: Question for those who went from FTWM to SAHM or PTWM...

I was a SAHM from the very beginning so my opinion may be a bit different or not exactly what you are looking for..

But the one piece of advice i can give is this...If you CAN stay home and it's something you really want (its not for everyone, it has to totally be something you wish for..)then DO IT!

If it would kill you financially and make things uncomfortable then obviously that is different but if it is a situation where your bills are met and you can save the amount you feel comfortable saving, then do it! You have to step back and look at the big picture.

The time when they are little is so fleeting. It goes by in the blink of an eye. So if its feasible for you, i would say wholeheartedly do it. For ME there was nothing better than being with my kids (although exhausting at times). In my personal situation money was tight, we cut back a bit for me to stay home but life didn't change too drastically..we didn't have much before i got pg and didn't have much after...so i didn't miss much, lol. We had one car, rented etc...now we own a home and are looking into buying another car when DH gets home from overseas.

Sorry for going off topic a bit but you get my point. Sit down and figure out what you TRULY need to feel ok. The number is different for everyone. And if you can stay home and have that amount definitely go for it!! I don't know of any moms who made that decision and regretted it!

Re: Question for those who went from FTWM to SAHM or PTWM...

I went from FTWM, to PTWM, to SAHM.

We felt the drop each time honestly because the hits were big and we had to adjust our lives accordingly. But its all worth it. We dont save as much as we used to, some months we dont save anything. But we take DH's bonus and tax returns and they go right into savings.

Right now we both feel that the place for me to be is what our kids. Even if that means we have to make financial sacrifices. I miss working and my return PT in a year or so, but I really just take it month by month. Until my DS #2 was born I babysat from home which was a nice bonus $$wise. Now that we have 2 I am not doing that.

I hate to live today in fear of our future. We have a nice nest egg that allows us to be comfortable and never feel like we can't do something we want to do. We have his 401K which we max out and we have other funds we contribute to when we can.

Each family has to do what they feel is best for them.

Re: Question for those who went from FTWM to SAHM or PTWM...

I was never a FTWM, I worked FT, got pregnant, asked to come back PT. Working PT is the BEST...

We were always big savers, so financially it wasn't a HUGE hit. We just bought a house and, yes, could have bought a bigger one if I was working FT, but it's not worth the time I'm spending with DD. If you have the chance to be home with DC, DO IT!

Message edited 7/20/2011 9:22:59 AM.

Re: Question for those who went from FTWM to SAHM or PTWM...

Here I am from the *poor* perspective. I was working FT in NYC when I got pregnant. After 18 weeks I was put on bed rest for the rest of my pregnancy. I never went back. Instead of half of my paycheck going to daycare so I can work f/t, I choose to work p/t. We cant do vacations. We extra money that could go to savings goes to doing things during the week/weekends (splish splash, mueseums, etc). When DS is older and in school will bump up my hours and then worry about saving. But I am comfortable living paycheck to paycheck to maintain the balance I have. For some, this kind of lifestyle would drive them nuts.

Re: Question for those who went from FTWM to SAHM or PTWM...

I am talking with my boss about being a PTWM when I return from maternity leave. I think the finances will be okay and if anything we just wont be able to save as much but I dont know for sure yet but I knew that I wanted/needed more time with DD so I think I will have the best of both worlds - 3 days at work and 2 days at home. I think that if you can make it work you should try it for a little while. My plan is work 3 days through the end of the year and then go to 4 days and maybe be back to full time by the time she is one year...

Re: Question for those who went from FTWM to SAHM or PTWM...

Thanks so much ladies.

So, long story short, I was offered a pt position, and I would be out of the house less than 20 hrs a week, vs the 60+ hrs I am now. So to me, it would almost feel like I would get to be a SAHM, but keep working a little. The paycut is huge, but, I'm trying to just justify it all in my head.

When it comes down to it all though, the time I get to spend with dd is priceless...

Thank you all for your input!!!!

Re: Question for those who went from FTWM to SAHM or PTWM...

I kind of looked at it like this-

My kids are going to be in school from 8-3 before I know it. If I want to go back to work then to try and save more $ for the future I will.

I was making a very nice salary and so things have changed financially around here since I quit working. We used to just buy/go/do whatever we wanted and now I have to think about purchase, look for sales, hold off on things. But you know what? Life changed a lot ANYWAY since having kids and the way we used to act just tossing around money like we were Bill Gates was stupid b/c we're not and were never rich like that (obviously, lol). I don't want to teach that to my kids anyway- it's a crap lesson/habit for them to pick up.

Re: Question for those who went from FTWM to SAHM or PTWM...

I went from 6 months mat leave to being a PTWM (I'm off every Friday). Financially it hasn't affected us as I was recently promoted so my pt salary is what my ft salary was before maternity leave. I would LOVE to only work 3 days a week but for now, having that extra day home with DD is worth everything.