Questions about finding out/not finding out gender and Level II

For some reason, I am torn about finding out the gender this time. At my 16 week appt last week, I told the sono tech not to tell me if she could see what gender the baby is. Now since my Level II is about 3 weeks away, I am still on the fence.

This will be my second child and I have a DS. Of course everyone is on my case about how they "hope I have a girl". My last pregnancy, which was only last year, I was pregnant with twin boys and lost one after delivery. What got me upset while pregnant was that I got a lot of ignorant and stupid comments when I said I was having 2 boys; it really upset me that people would not just simply say "congratulations" instead of "oh well, you'll have to try for a 3rd" or "too bad it's not a boy and a girl" or "ohhh 2 boys, you're in for it". What got me even more upset was that these comments scared me about having 2 boys. Anyway, when I lost one of my twins, I felt so guilty for even giving anything about the gender a second thought. So what I'm getting at is maybe this time I should just make it a surprise so I don't feel obligated to tell anyone anything and I can just embrace my baby after birth and not even consider what gender it is. However, I don't know if I can hold out....so my main question is, if I tell the tech at the Level II that I don't want to know, but then 2 weeks later change my mind, do they note that on the chart or do I need to ask them to do that? Will they even do that? I know this is pretty stupid, but I guess this has been heavy on my mind.

Thanks!!

Re: Questions about finding out/not finding out gender and Level II

im sorry you had to go through all that.

i just had my level 2 this morning and before she started she said, "are we finding out the sex today?" so i think they verify with you before they say anything.

Re: Questions about finding out/not finding out gender and Level II

First off, I'm so sorry for what you went through - and people say the stupidest things. I get all the time "I hope you are having a girl" --- I want to say "If I don't care what I'm having, why the hell would you care?"

To answer your question, I don't believe they write the sex of the baby on the chart. Maybe ask her to put it in an envelope, seal it up, give it to someone or hide it, and if you get the urge you can open it down the road!

Re: Questions about finding out/not finding out gender and Level II

We are team I love surprises...and DH is just plain old fashioned. I have been tempted at my Level II to find out, but the urge passed when I thought about the moment after the baby is born and they announce whether I have a girl or boy.

But I reminded the tech in the Level II that we didn't want to find out and she said not to worry, they only say something if the couple asks.

Re: Questions about finding out/not finding out gender and Level II

Posted by Diana1215

First off, I'm so sorry for what you went through - and people say the stupidest things. I get all the time "I hope you are having a girl" --- I want to say "If I don't care what I'm having, why the hell would you care?"

To answer your question, I don't believe they write the sex of the baby on the chart. Maybe ask her to put it in an envelope, seal it up, give it to someone or hide it, and if you get the urge you can open it down the road!

Re: Questions about finding out/not finding out gender and Level II

Posted by ShhhhTTC

im sorry you had to go through all that.

i just had my level 2 this morning and before she started she said, "are we finding out the sex today?" so i think they verify with you before they say anything.

Re: Questions about finding out/not finding out gender and Level II

Posted by oktom22

We are team I love surprises...and DH is just plain old fashioned. I have been tempted at my Level II to find out, but the urge passed when I thought about the moment after the baby is born and they announce whether I have a girl or boy.

But I reminded the tech in the Level II that we didn't want to find out and she said not to worry, they only say something if the couple asks.

Re: Questions about finding out/not finding out gender and Level II

So sorry about your little boy.

I agree that is the way to go. Concentrate on a happy healthy baby and try to avoid those conversations with people.

And yes, the techs usually do ask before they start and they typically do not write the results on your chart. But I too always remind them that we are not finding out each time.

Re: Questions about finding out/not finding out gender and Level II

Sorry about that :( Maybe you and DH can decide if you want to find out and just don't tell anyone else! Keep it between the two of you : )

Re: Questions about finding out/not finding out gender and Level II