Sitting here reading about child care..

And I started to burst into tears. I have 5 more weeks with DS before I go to work and am looking into a center close to my job, but feel guilty as hell that I have to go back to work at all!!

I need some mommy advice from those who went back to work. I hate having to have someone else take care of my baby and spend all day with him. I hate that I have to go back to work. I hate that the thought of someone not picking him up when he cries, or knowing which cry means he's hungry, wet, etc makes me want to sell my house.

Today I just hate it all...

Re: Sitting here reading about child care..

I have 5 more weeks until i go to work and DS goes to daycare. I will join you in the cry fest!

Re: Sitting here reading about child care..

Okay, here is some good stuff about daycare. My son has been in daycare since he was 1 and he bloody loves it. He thrives on the routine that they have there, he loves the attention of all the girls, he loves the company of the other children, when he comes home he babbles away for ages about who he played with, and what he did (its usually something to do with Reuben and Choo Choos) I don't think I could give him as much attention at home as he gets at his nursery.

Once you are back at work and back into the swing of things, you won't feel as bad as you do now. I promise you!

Good Luck!

Re: Sitting here reading about child care..

I go back in 3 week.....

Re: Sitting here reading about child care..

Awwwww

DD has been going to daycare since she was 10 weeks old. As hard as it was to "give up control" of DD during the day- I have really grown to love my daycare center. I think you have to be fully comfortable with whomever is going to be watching your baby. DD absolutely LOVES her daycare. She gives her teacher a great big huge smile when we get there in the morning. She loves to "play" with all of her little friends there. And the teacher does so much with them! Stuff I would have never even thought of!

The way I see it, she is getting exposed to all kinds of stuff she probably wouldn't if she was home with me- and I absolutely love seeing her develop because of it!

Re: Sitting here reading about child care..

I just got all teary reading your post.

From one working mom to another I can tell you that it will be okay.

"I hate having to have someone else take care of my baby and spend all day with him."
They will do a good job taking care of him but they will not replace you..and he WILL know the difference. They really won't spend all day with him either..he'll spend more time with the kids than with one particular adult.


"I hate that the thought of someone not picking him up when he cries, or knowing which cry means he's hungry, wet, etc makes me want to sell my house."
They will pick him up and comfort him please don't worry about that. And eventually they will understand his cries too. They will assess the situation like they teach new parents (does the cry mean diaper change, feeding, or just holding) and they will give him what he needs for that time. But it will never be the way you give him that attention.

He will miss you...he will be happy to see you and he will always know that you are mommy!

My favorite part of the day during the week is the moment I walk through the classroom door. You'd think I was Santa with an armful of presents - my son just lights up and now that he can crawl it's so wonderful to see him drop a toy and make a mad dash for me.


It will be hard but you'll see how well he does with all the children and then you'll have those moments like my pick up one and you'll be okay.

Message edited 3/25/2008 4:04:21 PM.

Re: Sitting here reading about child care..

I think every working mommy on here can relate to how you feel, but it does get better!

Yes it sometimes ***** when you think about it and not being able to be with them all the time, but like Ang said when you walk through that door and they see you - you will see that they know exactly who their mom is.

As my boys have gotten older, I actually think they are thriving having others watch them and it makes me really, really enjoy the days i get to be with them.

So hang in there!

Re: Sitting here reading about child care..

I TOTALLY understand what you are feeling. I have been coasting by the past month or so with family watching my son while I am at work (still cried the first few times I left him)

But now that cruise is over, and he will have to go to a center, it is DEF> one of the most difficult decisions I have ever had to make. I HATE leaving his bright smiling face, and I miss him.

BUT...in my search I have met some amazing people, that i know will take great care of my son. No, they will not replace me, nor could anyone ever love my son as I do. But he will be cared for and safe.

I send you tons of because I know how hard it is. The anticipation is worse than the actual happening, but you'll get through it, and I promise its WAY harder on us mommies than it is on our little ones.


PS. I did not visit one place where a baby was crying, not one! Even if it was a place that really just gave basic care, the needs were met, and baby was content.

Re: Sitting here reading about child care..

Re: Sitting here reading about child care..

Don't worry. It is hard at first, to leave your little one with someone else. A good thing to do might be to start at daycare a week early, that way you can spend the day there with him getting used to the place and them getting used to DC so that you're all comfortable (a good place won't care if you're there).

I love my daycare. DS is happy there and the ladies know him very well now. He has his favorite toys and his little "clique" of friends he likes to play with. Even when he was very little, I would show up to pick him up and I would watch him through the window smiling or laughing hysterically with the other people there.

It will get easier!

Re: Sitting here reading about child care..

I'm having the same exact issue..... though still not entirely sure when I'm going to get back to work but in reality I have no choice eventually. I have no one at all to watch her and I refuse to put her in day care earlier then 3 months or so and she's only 3 weeks now so I have a ways to go. Plus we don't have any money for day care so we are def screwed but I know i'm going to cry hysterically when I have to give her to anyone besides me or DH.

Re: Sitting here reading about child care..

this is my first week back
I cried all the time, still do Was mad at my DD for not being able to support us - though I know its not fair to him because he works hard.

So, I cry and cry, but day goes by and than I am back with her and enjoy every minute of it. The way I look at it, is I spend quality time with her and enjoy her that much more because I don't get the frustration of her crying all the time.

Re: Sitting here reading about child care..

Posted by Ali1

I think every working mommy on here can relate to how you feel, but it does get better!

Yes it sometimes ***** when you think about it and not being able to be with them all the time, but like Ang said when you walk through that door and they see you - you will see that they know exactly who their mom is.

As my boys have gotten older, I actually think they are thriving having others watch them and it makes me really, really enjoy the days i get to be with them.

So hang in there!

Re: Sitting here reading about child care..

I have 2 weeks to go and if I could sell my co-op tomorrow I would just so I could stay home. I know how you feel.