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So Upset -- work related

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Melbernai
I am a lucky Momma!

Member since 7/05

15652 total posts

Name:
Melissa

So Upset -- work related

I am so upset and have spent a good part of the evening thinking about this.

I teach 1st grade in Brooklyn. Today at around 2pm one of the school aids came in for one of my students -- said he was leaving and should bring his backpack and jacket.

The student was all excited, thinking his mom was there and he was going home early.

I said goodbye to him, a few of his friends said bye, that was it.

Then at dismissal the principal said that she needed to speak to me. Apparently CPS was there to pick him up -- Child Protection Services --- he was brought to a group home. I guess they've been investigating over this week because of things going on with his older sister and I didn't even know a thing about it. My principal said the situation is bad, we probably won't see him again this year, she's not expecting him to be returned to the home.

I am upset for a few reasons. First of all I'm so upset that I didn't get to say goodbye to this kid. He is a kid with issues -- I didn't suspect abuse, just that the kids in my area live a different life then we did growing up -- it doesn't always mean abuse and I honestly didn't suspect it.

And I'm just picturing this kid, who I care about so much at this point in the year --- leaving the room thinking that he was going home with his mom and meanwhile it was strange social workers taking him to a home where he is going to have to stay for an indefinate amount of time.

It all just makes me sad. Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 5/2/06 8:45 PM
 
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mrswask
Pookie Love

Member since 5/05

20229 total posts

Name:
Michal

Re: So Upset -- work related

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Just keep telling yourself that hopefully his situation will improve.

Posted 5/2/06 8:47 PM
 

VirginiaDeb
Don't eat me, hippo!

Member since 5/05

9252 total posts

Name:
Deb

Re: So Upset -- work related

Oh my gosh - i'm so sorry to hear that. Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

I just hope that this is the start of something better for him.

Posted 5/2/06 8:48 PM
 

BobBsWife
No more school= too much time!

Member since 5/05

1395 total posts

Name:
Tracy

Re: So Upset -- work related

That is very sad and I can see how you can be disheartened. Yet if something is drastically wrong in the household and this child is in danger it is the best!Chat Icon Its amazing how a teacher becomes attached to their students? I was jus thinking how all my kids are leaving my class soon!! And I teach high school!

Posted 5/2/06 8:48 PM
 

evenedan
Need a little sunshine

Member since 9/05

3843 total posts

Name:
D

Re: So Upset -- work related

Oh boy, this is totally heartbreaking. But you should be comforted by the fact that he hopefully has been taken out of bad situation and will be placed in a better one soon. And I think it's wonderful that your students have a teacher that cares about them so much!

Posted 5/2/06 8:49 PM
 

Stefanie

Member since 5/05

23599 total posts

Name:
Stefanie

Re: So Upset -- work related

Know that you provided a safe and loving environment there at school...

Sorry things turned out that way...Chat Icon

Posted 5/2/06 8:49 PM
 

nrthshgrl
It goes fast. Pay attention.

Member since 7/05

57538 total posts

Name:

Re: So Upset -- work related

That's horrible.Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

I'm not sure what the policy is but I would think you'd be notified about it beforehand...is writing him a letter telling him you were thinking about him completely out of line??

Posted 5/2/06 8:51 PM
 

MrsProfessor
hi

Member since 5/05

14279 total posts

Name:

Re: So Upset -- work related

I'm sorry- I teach in the South Bronx and have been in similar situations more than once- one day in class, the next day gone and you aren't even told that there was a problem. And you feel a whole range of things that you can't really resolve. Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 5/2/06 8:51 PM
 

Melbernai
I am a lucky Momma!

Member since 7/05

15652 total posts

Name:
Melissa

Re: So Upset -- work related

Apparently a lot was going on with the sister who is in the 4th grade --- that nothing was happening to my student they don't think but that he has "witnessed" things that a 6 year old certainly should not see.

I'm so torn on this. The foster system in NYC is so messed up. I had a girl who was a foster chid in my class my first year who was CLEARLY being abused -- both sexually and physically, and they just left her in the foster home because she was placed -- rather then having to be in a group home. They didn't want to be bothered.

So I don't know what would be worse! An abusive foster home, foster home after foster home after foster home -- or seeing bad things happening to your sister. I just feel like none of the options are good at all!

I wish I could just take them home with me -- the kids who have it really bad, to show them something else -- that the world doesn't need to be this way. Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 5/2/06 8:53 PM
 

Melbernai
I am a lucky Momma!

Member since 7/05

15652 total posts

Name:
Melissa

Re: So Upset -- work related

Posted by nrthshgrl

That's horrible.Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

I'm not sure what the policy is but I would think you'd be notified about it beforehand...is writing him a letter telling him you were thinking about him completely out of line??



Right now the only people that know where he is is CPS -- the school doesn't even know. They can't release that information -- so I don't know if a letter would get to him.

I just wish I would have known so I could have told him to hang in there --- told him SOMETHING to make him know that he would get through this...

Posted 5/2/06 8:54 PM
 

Moehick
Ready for the sun!

Member since 5/05

30339 total posts

Name:
Properly perfect™

Re: So Upset -- work related

I am so sorry....what you have to see with your kids is so heartwrenching...your right I wish we could all show them the world doesn't have to be this wayChat Icon

Posted 5/2/06 8:54 PM
 

MrsProfessor
hi

Member since 5/05

14279 total posts

Name:

Re: So Upset -- work related

Posted by Melbernai

I wish I could just take them home with me -- the kids who have it really bad, to show them something else -- that the world doesn't need to be this way. Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon



I've had those thoughts too- there was a kid in my school last year (8th grader who got a full scholarship to Miss Porters) who'd had such a sh!tty life- mom died in front of her (asthma). She ended up with an aunt who didn't want her. I was so tempted to fix our extra room for her for the summer but I knew it would be turned into a huge thing and I don't even know if it would have been legal. Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 5/2/06 8:56 PM
 

Stefanie

Member since 5/05

23599 total posts

Name:
Stefanie

Re: So Upset -- work related

When you're a teacher, you can never leave your "work" at work. Chat Icon

Posted 5/2/06 8:57 PM
 

pmpkn087
Life is good...

Member since 9/05

18504 total posts

Name:
Stephanie

Re: So Upset -- work related

I'm sorry you are going through this. Just try to remember that if his situation was bad enough for CPS to take him away from his parents, then it is good that he will, hopefully, be in a better place now.

Posted 5/2/06 8:59 PM
 

MrsERod
Praying for Everyone.

Member since 5/05

26170 total posts

Name:
MrsERod™®

Re: So Upset -- work related

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Posted 5/2/06 9:28 PM
 

Tany
Becoming a different woman

Member since 5/05

24460 total posts

Name:
Tania

Re: So Upset -- work related

wow, what a sad situation.Chat Icon

Posted 5/2/06 9:30 PM
 

Samlove

Member since 5/05

4729 total posts

Name:
Shari

Re: So Upset -- work related

Sorry to hear about your day. I know what you are feeling, I taught in Brooklyn as well in a tough area ( Brownsville) and now in Hempstead so it goes on all the time. It is sad.

Posted 5/2/06 9:34 PM
 

justthe4ofus
I hate hypocrites!!!!!

Member since 5/05

6905 total posts

Name:

Re: So Upset -- work related

Posted by nrthshgrl

That's horrible.Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

I'm not sure what the policy is but I would think you'd be notified about it beforehand...is writing him a letter telling him you were thinking about him completely out of line??



Unfortunately in many school districts the teacher is often the last to be told of a known situation, which is RIDICULOUS! Or if the teacher suspects abuse, at least in my distirct, we are to report it to pupil services and wait for them to get out of the their coffee cloch and actually do something.

A teacher in my department has a brother and sister in 2 different classes. The kids are constantly coming in with bruises and such and she has been down every day ranting and raving about them being abused and sadly it was falling on deaf ears. She crossed the invisible line and did some investigation and found out there were 3 reports to CPS in elementary school and what has happened since then- NOTHING!Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

My mother used to work for CPS and I interned there. I can't tell you the heartwrenching stories I have seen or heard. I can't tell you how many times my Mother was held in contempt of court because she refused to comply with the judges orders of putting the families back together. One time she even locked herself in the bathroom with a child refusing to return him to his family and the judged held her in contempt. My Mom was screaming the Mother will kill him if you return him. Sure enough and sadly enough, she killed him within 2 months of him being returned Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon I hope that bytch rots in jail forever!

I cannot tell you how many adopted brothers and sisters I would have had, had my mother had the money.

Melissa I know it's hard. The whole situation is sad. If you can get the name of the Case Worker, you can send a letter to him/her and the case worker can get it to the child for you.

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Posted 5/2/06 10:00 PM
 
 

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