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PearlJamChick
No one sings like you anymore.
Member since 7/10 9264 total posts
Name:
Petticoated Swashbuckler
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Sometimes I come onto this forum and...
...write a huge long vent about some stupid thing that someone said to me regarding DH and I being CF (and planning to stay that way) and I just don't hit "add new topic"...because just typing it out takes the whole frustration away.
Ah, cheap therapy. 
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Posted 2/22/11 2:08 PM  |
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Christine
2nd verse same as the 1st
Member since 5/05 15287 total posts
Name:
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Re: Sometimes I come onto this forum and...
It's amazing how just getting it out makes you feel better sometimes. 
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| Posted 2/22/11 2:29 PM |
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PrincessVonTrockel
Trophy Wife in Training
Member since 11/09 2953 total posts
Name:
Natalie
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Re: Sometimes I come onto this forum and...
Lolol. Hit send I love hearing about stupid ppl.
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| Posted 2/22/11 4:42 PM |
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Mushesgirl
Too blessed to be stressed
Member since 4/09 6691 total posts
Name:
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Re: Sometimes I come onto this forum and...
Posted by PrincessVonTrockel
Lolol. Hit send I love hearing about stupid ppl.
me too!
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| Posted 2/22/11 8:34 PM |
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mrsh2010
To travel is to live.
Member since 7/09 1679 total posts
Name:
Celia
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Re: Sometimes I come onto this forum and...
Posted by Mushesgirl
Posted by PrincessVonTrockel
Lolol. Hit send I love hearing about stupid ppl.
me too!
me three and especially since I know you have some great comebacks. I love to hear them!
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| Posted 2/23/11 1:10 PM |
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dfw343
LIF Infant
Member since 7/10 246 total posts
Name:
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Re: Sometimes I come onto this forum and...
I'd love to hear the Mombie stories too!
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| Posted 2/23/11 1:31 PM |
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jilliibabii
Mrs. O'Connor
Member since 6/10 12821 total posts
Name:
Jillian
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Re: Sometimes I come onto this forum and...
I do that stuff all the time! It does help just to write it all out!
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| Posted 2/23/11 4:54 PM |
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Re: Sometimes I come onto this forum and...
I could write a book about the things I hear from people re: my decision to be CF (same w/ DH).
I also keep typing out thread topics like "Why Havings Kids Can Ruin Your Life Forever", and have a detailed list of things which go underneath but I'm afraid of posting it because *some* LIF'ers would get offended (esp the TTC crowd) and of course, because its true but none of the non-CFers want to admit that pregnancy, childbirth and raising kids result in overall unhappiness...
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| Posted 2/25/11 3:07 PM |
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Re: Sometimes I come onto this forum and...
Posted by BatGirl9910
I could write a book about the things I hear from people re: my decision to be CF (same w/ DH).
I also keep typing out thread topics like "Why Havings Kids Can Ruin Your Life Forever", and have a detailed list of things which go underneath but I'm afraid of posting it because *some* LIF'ers would get offended (esp the TTC crowd) and of course, because its true but none of the non-CFers want to admit that pregnancy, childbirth and raising kids result in overall unhappiness...
I don't get offended... I am happy with my decision and think your views of children Are amusing. I wouldn't push my lifestyle choice on anyone. I think people should be cf if they want, or have kids if they want....
But it really seems you view kids as nothing but misery. That There is not one shred of joy at all once a kid is in the picture. I cant imagine why anyone would push a kid on you with that kind of perspective! I would be happy thAt someone with your thoughts will never have kids!
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| Posted 3/5/11 8:38 PM |
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josie919
Here we go!
Member since 2/08 1108 total posts
Name:
Josie
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Re: Sometimes I come onto this forum and...
Posted by BatGirl9910
its true but none of the non-CFers want to admit that pregnancy, childbirth and raising kids result in overall unhappiness...
I will start by saying, I come on here mainly to see the otehr side of things because I do have many CF friends. Sometimes the things u girls post are eye openers for people WITH kids.
Anyway- Pregnancy, was a b*tch. Childbirth, although not painful, was annoying, time consuming and obnoxious at times. Rasing my child- well, there are moments where I wonder if my daughter has actually been taken over by some crazed force because thats the only excuse for her behavior.
And then there are times, like last night, when walking out of her bedroom when my 2 year old says ' Love you Sweetpea' to me  I guess i'll keep her around for a while. Though i'm sure tomorrow she will probably smear pudding in my beige carpet.. and it will undoubtedly be chocolate, never do they make a mess with vanilla ANYTHING. That def falls under the 'unhappy' times 
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| Posted 3/14/11 6:32 AM |
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heathergirl
Cocktail Time!
Member since 10/08 4978 total posts
Name:
American mouth
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Re: Sometimes I come onto this forum and...
I'm too afraid of getting raked over the coals!
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| Posted 3/14/11 12:52 PM |
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Mushesgirl
Too blessed to be stressed
Member since 4/09 6691 total posts
Name:
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Re: Sometimes I come onto this forum and...
maybe it's because i'm 35 and dh is 43 that we don't really get much of these comments anymore. maybe people figure either 1: they're trying and can't conceive or
2: its none of my business
when people do ask about it they're generally really understanding when i say heck no, we're too happy to have kids
I know there are people out there who are so over the moon for their kids that they think everyone should feel as happy about it as them, and I get that.
I also know parents who are miserable about 88% of the time, are totally worn out, the relationship is strained, they are fatigued, broke, and generally out of patience. I think its extremely difficult to raise children in this day and age.
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| Posted 3/14/11 10:03 PM |
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Pomegranate5
LIF Adult
Member since 2/11 4798 total posts
Name:
Pomegranate5
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Re: Sometimes I come onto this forum and...
Posted by BatGirl9910
I could write a book about the things I hear from people re: my decision to be CF (same w/ DH).
I also keep typing out thread topics like "Why Havings Kids Can Ruin Your Life Forever", and have a detailed list of things which go underneath but I'm afraid of posting it because *some* LIF'ers would get offended (esp the TTC crowd) and of course, because its true but none of the non-CFers want to admit that pregnancy, childbirth and raising kids result in overall unhappiness...
I am TTC and I wouldn't be offended by your list - just like I didn't let it bother me when pregnant couples told us that our lives wouldn't be complete until we had a baby.  Because everyone should live their life in a way that makes THEM happy.
But I would only point out that a discussion about why you are happier for remaining CF comes across differently than a discussion about why children would ruin your life, even though they are basically the same line of thinking.
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| Posted 3/15/11 10:10 AM |
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Re: Sometimes I come onto this forum and...
Posted by Pomegranate5
Posted by BatGirl9910
I could write a book about the things I hear from people re: my decision to be CF (same w/ DH).
I also keep typing out thread topics like "Why Havings Kids Can Ruin Your Life Forever", and have a detailed list of things which go underneath but I'm afraid of posting it because *some* LIF'ers would get offended (esp the TTC crowd) and of course, because its true but none of the non-CFers want to admit that pregnancy, childbirth and raising kids result in overall unhappiness...
I am TTC and I wouldn't be offended by your list - just like I didn't let it bother me when pregnant couples told us that our lives wouldn't be complete until we had a baby. Because everyone should live their life in a way that makes THEM happy.
But I would only point out that a discussion about why you are happier for remaining CF comes across differently than a discussion about why children would ruin your life, even though they are basically the same line of thinking.
No its NOT the same thing. Don't put words in my mouth. I never said "don't have children because they will ruin your life". Parental UNHAPINESS is a documented FACT. Read the latest science journals, ro at least the latest New York Magazing article that highlighted recent psychological tests proving that Parents experience much more stressful periods as parents than non-parents. Google that if you need more input.
If you want kids, GREAT - knock yourself out, its your biological imperative as women after all.. But just because some of us (esp us CF-ers on this board, a board which I wonder why YOU would be frequenting  ) are adamant about not having kids because of personal reasons, does not mean we think kids ruin our lives. We just know the stress and pressures that being a Parent brings and desire to postpone that, or not even go through it at all.
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| Posted 3/15/11 2:41 PM |
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Pomegranate5
LIF Adult
Member since 2/11 4798 total posts
Name:
Pomegranate5
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Re: Sometimes I come onto this forum and...
Posted by BatGirl9910
Posted by Pomegranate5
Posted by BatGirl9910
I could write a book about the things I hear from people re: my decision to be CF (same w/ DH).
I also keep typing out thread topics like "Why Havings Kids Can Ruin Your Life Forever", and have a detailed list of things which go underneath but I'm afraid of posting it because *some* LIF'ers would get offended (esp the TTC crowd) and of course, because its true but none of the non-CFers want to admit that pregnancy, childbirth and raising kids result in overall unhappiness...
I am TTC and I wouldn't be offended by your list - just like I didn't let it bother me when pregnant couples told us that our lives wouldn't be complete until we had a baby. Because everyone should live their life in a way that makes THEM happy.
But I would only point out that a discussion about why you are happier for remaining CF comes across differently than a discussion about why children would ruin your life, even though they are basically the same line of thinking.
No its NOT the same thing. Don't put words in my mouth. I never said "don't have children because they will ruin your life". Parental UNHAPINESS is a documented FACT. Read the latest science journals, ro at least the latest New York Magazing article that highlighted recent psychological tests proving that Parents experience much more stressful periods as parents than non-parents. Google that if you need more input.
If you want kids, GREAT - knock yourself out, its your biological imperative as women after all.. But just because some of us (esp us CF-ers on this board, a board which I wonder why YOU would be frequenting ) are adamant about not having kids because of personal reasons, does not mean we think kids ruin our lives. We just know the stress and pressures that being a Parent brings and desire to postpone that, or not even go through it at all.
Ok, obviously what I said must have come across completely different from how I intended it to. I don't care how you feel about having children. I agree with you about the stress and unhappiness that can result from having children. Married couples without children tend to be happier. I'm aware of that.
YOU said that you've considered starting certain topics, but don't because of the backlash from TTC'ers or parents. All I was saying was that there is more than one way to word things so people wouldn't take offense to it. And your exact words were:
I also keep typing out thread topics like "Why Havings Kids Can Ruin Your Life Forever"
So I'm not putting any words in your mouth. That is actually what you said.
This board is for families who are CF, which I am. It isn't about hating on the decision to have children.
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| Posted 3/15/11 4:10 PM |
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MrsPJB2007
MBA at your service!
Member since 7/06 12020 total posts
Name:
MJ
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Re: Sometimes I come onto this forum and...
Posted by Pomegranate5
This board is for families who are CF, which I am. It isn't about hating on the decision to have children.
Every now and again the whole "point" of this CF board comes up. I think it's so important to remember this concept.
The CF board is about families who are CF right now -- NOT necessarily people who are CF forever or people who feel that having children will "ruin their lives forever."
There are plenty of people on here who are CF by choice, while others are just waiting a bit to have a child, and others who are here because of infertility issues, and therefore NOT CF by choice, but it's just what they are dealing with in their life.
So anyone who wishes to post here should be welcome, because at one point, there were parents who were CF and there are CFers will eventually (and even soon) be parents.
Any sort of topic that is about how kids are just awful and ruining lives is going to ruffle feathers on BOTH sides of the fence.
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| Posted 3/15/11 8:36 PM |
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emilylives
biking
Member since 12/09 2163 total posts
Name:
Emily
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Re: Sometimes I come onto this forum and...
Posted by MrsPJB2007
Posted by Pomegranate5
This board is for families who are CF, which I am. It isn't about hating on the decision to have children.
Every now and again the whole "point" of this CF board comes up. I think it's so important to remember this concept.
The CF board is about families who are CF right now -- NOT necessarily people who are CF forever or people who feel that having children will "ruin their lives forever."
There are plenty of people on here who are CF by choice, while others are just waiting a bit to have a child, and others who are here because of infertility issues, and therefore NOT CF by choice, but it's just what they are dealing with in their life.
So anyone who wishes to post here should be welcome, because at one point, there were parents who were CF and there are CFers will eventually (and even soon) be parents.
Any sort of topic that is about how kids are just awful and ruining lives is going to ruffle feathers on BOTH sides of the fence.
It's slightly confusing because "CF" generally means "Child-Free," which does mean people who've made the choice not to have children. But "CF" here also means "Childless Families," which could have many meanings. However, when I read "families who are CF", I read that as "families who are child-free," not "families who are childless families." But anyway, it's just confusion w/ acronyms.
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| Posted 3/22/11 11:45 AM |
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