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Soon to be on this board...question for parents who both work outside the home...

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ChilisWife
God Bless America

Member since 5/05

3572 total posts

Name:
A.K.

Soon to be on this board...question for parents who both work outside the home...

HOW ON EARTH do you manage to shuttle your kids back and forth to school, deal with when they are home sick, take them to sports or other after school activities, showing up to their school events, and them having summers off?

ALL while working a full time job? Huh?

Obviously I'm having a panic attack.

Posted 3/16/11 8:28 PM
 

ThreeCats
Train Ride

Member since 5/05

3127 total posts

Name:
A

Re: Soon to be on this board...question for parents who both work outside the home...

we area in the same boat, i just don't knowChat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 3/17/11 7:12 AM
 

capricorn75
J-E-T-S

Member since 5/05

1645 total posts

Name:

Re: Soon to be on this board...question for parents who both work outside the home...

The ONLY reason this works for us is because I am fortunate enough to work in their school district. Which means identical vacations.

Schools have before and after care, you can drop them off early, pick them up late. Summer camps?

Good luck!

Posted 3/17/11 7:37 AM
 

sunny
Life is good!

Member since 5/05

8369 total posts

Name:
Stephanie

Re: Soon to be on this board...question for parents who both work outside the home...

It just works, because it has to. You have no choice!
I am lucky because my hours allow me to be home in time (barely, with minutes to spare) to get dd off the bus. My husband is self employed so schedules himself to start after he puts her on the bus.

As far as sick days, usually my husband stays home. If he can't, I call in sick. Sometimes my mother in law will take days off to watch her. I try and schedule my vacations to coincide with her school vacations, which isn't always possible because of course those are the weeks everybody wants.
This year I am taking 3 weeks off in the summer (2 in the beginning, one at the end) to minimize camp.
I signed her up for 6 weeks of camp. Not sure what we are going to do the rest of the last few weeks of summer. Actually, I am still not sure what I am going to to with her for spring break.....Chat Icon

It all works out in the end!Chat Icon

Posted 3/17/11 9:12 AM
 

Melissa77
Mommy of 3

Member since 8/08

2872 total posts

Name:
Melissa

Re: Soon to be on this board...question for parents who both work outside the home...

You make it work because you have to. Our school has before care and after care. My DD does dance on Saturdays and girl scouts at 6:30 pm on Tuesdays so I can take her after work.

We are fortunate enough to have grandparents for school breaks. In the summer, my DD will go back to her daycare center where they have a camp program.

I do have to say they seem to get a lot of days off compared to daycare. My DD has off next wednesday for staff development day and a half day the week after for parent/teacher conferences. Thakfully, I am home on matenrity leave right now.

Posted 3/17/11 11:07 AM
 

rojerono
Happiest.

Member since 8/06

13803 total posts

Name:
Jeannie

Re: Soon to be on this board...question for parents who both work outside the home...

Posted by sunny

It just works, because it has to. You have no choice!

It all works out in the end!Chat Icon



Yep!

Rob was actually home for the last 2 years most of the time so that was helpful. But prior to that (and now that he's back at work) we just seem to find a way.

My job knows that I drop the kids off at 8:45 so I am often going to be a few minutes late. It's not a big deal because I'm salary and I don't abuse my time. Sometimes I'll let them take breakfast at school so I can be in by 9. If there is some emergency in the morning I have neighbors who have kids that go to the same school and they are willing to carpool them up to school. They do have pre-care options at many schools too.

As to after school - Rob gets home fairly early (he's in the building trades) - but we still have aftercare booked for them because it's still not early enough to get them at dismissal.

Sick days and vacation days? It's not an option for Rob to stay home, so I will sometimes take them to work with me. I also rely on friends when I'm in a real pickle. Summers are summer camp.. but there are usually 2 weeks when they are not in camp or school.

I save up my vaca and sick and personal time to use as needed.

You'll work it out and even when it's worked out you'll still panic if you think too much about how finely balanced it all is!! Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 3/17/11 12:48 PM
 

steph4777
**************

Member since 5/05

11726 total posts

Name:
Stephanie

Re: Soon to be on this board...question for parents who both work outside the home...

I agree with Melissa, you just figure it out. It took a while to figure out how to make it work honestly and I was really stressed in Sept. Our routine has a lot of back and forth, but it works.

I'm very fortunate that my employer is very flexible and that I can make my own hours when I need to. DH is an attorney with the state and he has less flexibility than I do. He has to sign in and out. If he doesn't work an 8 hour day they take it out of his paid time off. I end up doing a lot of work after the kids go to bed to make up for time not in the office.

DS doesn't start school until 9am and they don't have before care. DH will take the bus to work and I'll keep both kids. DS#2 is in a day care across the street from DH's office. At 9am, we drop DS#1 at school and then I drive downtown. I call DH and he comes down to get DS#2 and takes him to day care. I then go to the office a few blocks away.

Initially DS#1 was going to after care but when school started they didn't have the program in place. So my inlaws started picking him up and they still do. We are incredibly fortunate that they have continued to do this for us. Even when aftercare started, they said the were fine doing it. It also saves us some money.

At 5:30pm, I leave the office and go pick up DH and DS#2. We go pick up DS#1 from my inlaws and get home around 6:30-7pm depending on how much time we spend at my inlaws.

When they are off, if I don't have client meetings then I'll work from home otherwise they go to my inlaws. During the summer DS#1 will be going to DS#2's daycare for the summer program. It will be so much easier on our schedules because we can all leave the house together, make one stop and I'll get to work before 9am.

Try to do sports on Sat morning because during the week is just too much. We did swimming classes one night during the week because it was the only time it was offered and all of us were just exhausted at the end of the day. We didn't eat dinner until 8 or 9pm.

One thing I found that helps is waking up before everyone to have a few minutes to myself and prepping as much as I can the night before. It totally sets the tone for the day.

Message edited 3/17/2011 12:53:28 PM.

Posted 3/17/11 12:50 PM
 

justmefornow
LIF Adolescent

Member since 9/08

859 total posts

Name:
n

Re: Soon to be on this board...question for parents who both work outside the home...

Posted by ChilisWife

HOW ON EARTH do you manage to shuttle your kids back and forth to school, deal with when they are home sick, take them to sports or other after school activities, showing up to their school events, and them having summers off?

ALL while working a full time job? Huh?

Obviously I'm having a panic attack.



I started working FT in December, have a kindergartner and 2nd grader, and have been separated from STBX for 14 months. He is involved a bit more on the weekends (so he helps with taking them to their classes, in that time I go food shopping, run errands, clean, watch Lifetime haha) but it's limited to a few hours each weekend. I do EVERYTHING on my own M-F. We are out of the house at 8 am and home at 5:45. They are starving by then, so dinner has to be quick or already prepared. Everything is rushed but I try to have fun with kids and live in the moment.

I am fortunate that my job is 10 min away from home and I'm in a low pressure position where I do not have to work long hours (8:30 to 4:30). This will change when I want a promotion or want to earn more $$!!

They are in a free afterschool program and summer program at their school (at least this year they are). They are also open some holidays. I thank God for this program everyday!!! My dad and stepmom are nearby for all the other days I may need their help (kids being sick). I use my paid time off for other school events or appointments. My neighbors have babysat for me for an hour here or there during the week. I also have another sitter that I pay if needed.

The only weekday activities I take them to are every other Friday Girl Scouts meeting. On the weekends they have 1 class each on Saturdays and religious program on Sundays. I live for holiday weeks where we do not have to go anywhere for an entire day!

I let go of things that I used to place a lot more importance on and are now a luxury (clean house, well-balanced/homecooked dinners).

I prioritize and place importance on things that will matter 1 year, 5 years adn 10 years down the line (our health and wellbeing, so that means excercise, sleep, semi nutrtious meals, quality time with kids, for example, I sit there while they fall asleep because they need mya ttention and the dishes can wait).

My 2nd grader gets lots of homework and is in a Gifted program that I may pull her out of. We are all stressed lately, but we manage and I hope things will get better.

You do your best!!

Chat Icon

Message edited 3/17/2011 1:59:53 PM.

Posted 3/17/11 1:55 PM
 

Erica
LIF Adult

Member since 5/05

11767 total posts

Name:

Re: Soon to be on this board...question for parents who both work outside the home...

also check out day care centers - they often have vacation clubs for school vacations and days off

Posted 3/17/11 6:48 PM
 

livdrl112
LIF Infant

Member since 1/11

348 total posts

Name:

Re: Soon to be on this board...question for parents who both work outside the home...

I have been having similar nightmares too! Ds goes to this awesome daycare(and preschool) near where I work. Come sept, he will be in K about 40 mins away from me and his school aftercare prog is only till 5. I am trying to figure out how to send him to a different aftercare prog on regular school days and worry about what we will do for vacation time later. DH works in NYC and can work from home occassionally but the no of days the kids are off from school is just too much! We don't even have family nearby.
I wonder how other parents in this school district manage picking up their kids at 5! Even if they work nearby, most offices close at 5, right? Do they all leave early or have some one else pick them up?
I am sorry I am no help to you in figuring this out. I can only hope the other pps are right-that it all works out! Good Luck!

Posted 3/17/11 11:23 PM
 

Michelle
My Little Yankee Fans

Member since 1/06

4018 total posts

Name:

Re: Soon to be on this board...question for parents who both work outside the home...

DH gets home earlier then me so he can get them off the bus. If he didn't we would haveto do afterschool care. My friend does this and she has to pick up her daughter by 6pm. Her daughter loves it, her homework is usually done before she gets home and she usually can get her before 6 anyway.

When there are school vacations we bring them to the sitter they used to go to over the summer and before they started K.

When they are sick, we normally switch who stays home, or DH will leave early and I will go in a little late.

DH brings them to karate afterschool and will bring them to Tball too in the spring but I believe tball is when I will be home too.

It all works out when you have to make it work.

Posted 3/18/11 9:46 AM
 

nrthshgrl
It goes fast. Pay attention.

Member since 7/05

57538 total posts

Name:

Re: Soon to be on this board...question for parents who both work outside the home...

Posted by sunny

It just works, because it has to. You have no choice!



Best way to describe it.

My kids are in the aftercare program at school so it allows them to do things like Science Club, brownies, etc. becuase they are picked up by a teacher/troop leader & dropped back to the aftercare program after.

For religion classes, it gets tougher because we need to be in one that's either after 5pm or on Saturdays.

For sports (soccer), we picked a coach that we knew wanted late practices because he worked. Generally practices can't start until 5pm anyway because the fields are used for schools.

We did have to opt out of foreign language classes because they were at a different elementary school.

Posted 3/18/11 10:09 AM
 

BeachMom
Love my 4 kiddos!

Member since 11/08

8346 total posts

Name:
Kristie

Re: Soon to be on this board...question for parents who both work outside the home...

The only way we manage is that i have a very flexible job which allows me to set my own hours. So i work really early and DH gets our DD on the bus before he goes to work. For the summer they have camp and the vacations are either with family or me or DH take off. We alternate.

Posted 3/18/11 10:59 AM
 

luvsun27
Check out my cool glasses

Member since 5/05

8135 total posts

Name:
Kim

Re: Soon to be on this board...question for parents who both work outside the home...

I'm a single mom and DD is starting K in the fall. I work for myself, but I go to my clients offices, so while I have some flexibility, I am expected to be at the office on time. I think I can get away with dropping DD off at school in the morning and making it to the office ontime. She will go to the aftercare program at school and that goes until 6, so I can pick her up on my way home.

I have no idea what I'm going to do about school vacations. My family is all on LI and I'm in NJ. I'm sure they will help me during vacations. Summer she will go to camp at the town, which also have aftercare until 6.

On sick days or snow days I will just have to manage like I did this year with daycare. Most of the time, my clients were understanding and I worked from home so I didn't lose a days pay.

Posted 3/18/11 11:26 AM
 

debidonnamom
Kindness matters

Member since 12/10

1903 total posts

Name:
Mary (MOB)

Re: Soon to be on this board...question for parents who both work outside the home...

Grandma answers the call!!! Mary

Posted 3/18/11 6:07 PM
 
 

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