Step-parents....

What do you call them?

My step-daughter wants to call me mom....I'm unsure how to handle it. DH thinks it's a good idea. She has a mother who she sees (a crappy one...but one nonetheless). She lives with us....

Re: Step-parents....

My step-father has been around since I was 12 - I call him Dad. My son calls his step-dad by his first name - but now with the babies coming I think he will call him dad when he hears the babies do it. When referring to him he always says "My Dad".

eta - if I were you I would feel honored that she wants to call you mom - that is really sweetl that she thinks of you that way. You must be pretty special!

Message edited 5/24/2005 9:17:41 AM.

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i do not have step parents but my DH does and he calls her by her first name

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I call my mom's husband and my dad's wife by their names.
I would feel ackward calling them mom or dad.

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My step-dad has been around since I was 20, so I call him by his 1st name. My son, however, calls DH Dad. He's wanted to for a while, but has definately been doing it much more since the baby was born.

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How old is she?

I call my step-father by his first name... but my mom only got remarried about 2 years ago.

My DH calls his stepfather by his first name also and he's lived with him since he was around 10 or 11.

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My dad got remarried when almost 5, and my mom when I was 6. My step-parents have always been Ed and Karen.

My step-father was breifly daddy ed - but that didn't last very long.

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I guess it depends on how old you are when parents remarry. My brother's wife has a son from a previously relationship but he's only 2 and my brother is the only daddy he's ever known.

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I have a stepdad and a stepmom, and call them both by their first name. My stepdad has been around since my sisters and I were really young. We have a good relationship and all, but I could just never call two men "Dad". As for my stepmom, we also have a great relationship, but she made it clear early on that she wasn't trying to be a mom, so we've always called her by her name as well. Oh yaeh, my mom is psycho and if we called ANYONE else but her "Mom" she's probably flip the heII out! It's nice though, there are no hard feelings either way.

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I call my Dad's wife by her first name, and My son calls my fw wife either Brianne or BriBri. That's how she got her screen name.

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i call my step-dad, Dad. him and my mother started going out when i was like 3 1/2 though, and i never met my 'biological father' so there was no comparison/ competition.

on a side note- when they 1st started going out, i didnt talk to my dad for over a year and a half (he sometimes misses those days ). Anyway, when i started talking to him, i said to my mom "i dont like the name Jim, so can i just call him dad"

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i call my step dad by his name, but since he's been my s/d since i was 14 and i've known him since 10, i REFER to him and my mom as my parents. with my step mom, i call her by her name as well, but i refer to her as my stepmom. make sense? i wanted to call my stepdad 'dad' but also didn't want to insult my father, so i refrained.

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I have had a step-dad since I was 4. My mom started to date him then, lived with him for a few years and got married to him when I was 11.

I still mostly call him by his first name because that is what he answer me by. If I call him Dad, sometimes he will not answer me or will give me a delayed answer. I think this is funny. When I was in my late teens early 20's I started to call him dad. Before that it was a rebellion thing I had going on.

I believe if the child is comfortable with calling you a specific name, then that is ok. I would not force the issue. That is how my parents dealt with it and I came to terms with it on my own.

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I called my stepmother Mommy Cathy, but I was forced to do it at 16 and I hated it. I now call her by her first name. I do call her Mommy Cathy when I am talking about her to my sister for some odd reason. My sister still calls her Mommy Cathy but she was much younger when she married my Dad and they are much closer. If she wants to call you Mom and you are comfortable with it I would let her. It will probably mean a lot to her. Is her actual mother in the picture?

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first name

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I called my step-monster by her first name.

With regard to your step-daugther, if she wants to call you "mom", let her. But, make sure she always know that it's her choice and that you won't be hurt either way, and it's her choice to call you "mom".

don't make her feel forced, but also don't make her feel like you don't WANT to be thought of has her mother.

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i calkl him by his first name but think of a lot more colorful ones that i would rather call him

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Posted by True-Joy

i calkl him by his first name but think of a lot more colorful ones that i would rather call him

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i hvae known my stepmom since i was 4. i call her Vi, short for vivi ...pronouced V-- and VV. or veev. but her real name is valerie

Message edited 5/30/2005 12:07:47 AM.

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I dotn have step parents but my step sister calls my mom by her first name

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I have step-parents and call them by their first name. When I was youger I used to call my step-father pop-pop, b/c i lived with him. Now i call him by his first name.

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I call my step mother by her first name.

My cousin calls his step father Dad. He has known him since he was born, and his father only recently (after about 6 years) came back into the picture. When he referred to going to lunch with his biological father, he referred to him by his first name.

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Kim,

I think if your stepdaughter is comfortable calling you mom, let her do it. Maybe have some girl time and ask her why she'd like to call you mom. She may see you as more of a mother than her real mom.