EricaAlt
LIF Adult
Member since 7/08 22665 total posts
Name:
Erica
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The Office... Darryl's Best Lines:
Michael: Um, so, Darryl, and the boys in the hood in the warehouse, have graciously donated to, uh, go out for a beer with them right now. You know what, I'm actually going to bid on this. I'm going to start the bidding, because this is something that I have dreamt of-
Darryl: Mike, you can't do that. It's conflict of interest.
Jim: Five dollars.
Darryl: Sold! To Jim.
Darryl: Mike gave me a list of his top ten Springsteen songs. Three of them were Huey Lewis and the News. One was Tracy Chapman, Fast Car. And my personal favorite, Short People.
Darryl: You should stop calling yourself "baby daddy."
Michael: Why, Darryl, because I'm quote white quote unquote?
Darryl: Because you're not a daddy, and it's not your baby.
Michael: Well-
Darryl: You feel connected to his baby over there?
Michael: It's ... that's different.
Darryl: You feel connected to this? [holds up a back brace]
Michael: That's not a baby.
Darryl: You want to hold me, to see how you feel?
Michael: Could I?
Darryl: No.
Michael: Okay, so dig this: you're on the street, and one of your gang disses you.
Darryl: Oh my goodness.
Michael: Yeah, right, so what do you do to get them to make it right?
Darryl: Well see, um... in the gang world, we use something called Fluffy Fingers.
Michael: What is that?
Darryl: That's when somebody really gets in your face, you know, you just... start tickling them.
Michael: Really?
Darryl: Yeah, and then he starts tickling you. You know, pretty soon you're laughing and hugging. Before you know it, you've forgotten the whole thing. Ya'll can just go to church together... get an ice cream cone.
Darryl: Mike.
Michael: Hey.
Darryl: I'm very busy here, man.
Michael: Darryl, have you ever been in a gang?
Darryl: Why?
Michael: It's an advice question, and if you don't wanna talk about it, I completely understand. It's, um...
Darryl: No, no, no...
Michael: I know, it's very, very personal...
Darryl: No, um... I have.
Michael: I knew it. Okay, who we talking about here? Crips? Bloods?
Darryl: Both.
Michael: God.
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