Vent re Dr

I went to my obgyn on Monday for my two week post-op appt (I was technically at 12 days). I waited half an hour to be seen, which is not the end of the world but annoying. Dr pops her head in and says she needs to call the hospital to see if my pathology reports are in. Really? Shouldn't this have been done prior to my coming in.

15 mins later, I'm still waiting and literally walk out of the patient room to see if someone can give me an update. Dr comes back in and tells me the pathology report isn't in, that it usually takes 4 weeks. Come on! Why didn't the dr's office follow up on this and reschedule. I spent less than 5 mins with the dr. No physical exam, no blood work. Complete waste of my time and I have to go back in 3 weeks.

The dr asked me how I was doing and I started crying. I said I was sad and having lots of ups and downs. She said if I was still feeling like this when I came back she would give me something. I told her no. I don't understand. I'm supposed to be all better 5 weeks after I lost my baby? I feel like people are dismissive and think that oh, you'll just have another. Meanwhile, I'm wondering when the sadness and fear is going to go away.

Re: Vent re Dr

I feel your pain. I went two days ago for post-op and my paths weren't in yet either, though she warned me it could take 4-6 weeks. We are grieving, we suffered a loss. Many people are dismissive, particularly if we are early on. But the bottom line is, as nervous or apprehensive or as far along as we were we visualize that birth, birthdays, graduations, that baby was real and it was ours!! Many doctors are cold because they see it all the time, i am lucky mine is not. You should have had, at minimum, a physical exam. I have to go back to my RE for blood, but i just can't bring myself to go back in that building yet...just too much.
I am very conflicted as to how to proceed, this is my second loss in a short period of time. My OB told me to take my time, crying, being angry, terrified.... It's all normal. However if the grief is not allowing you to function through the day, I urge you to see a therapist. It's helped me a lot.
I don't know when the pain will go away, but I am learning how to deal with my feelings and figuring out who I am now. You can't go through it and be exactly the same. I'm trying to find the "new normal".
You have had so much taken away from you, don't let anyone try to take your sense of loss away, it's yours. Things will get a little better every day, our answers will come and if they don't we fight to get them. I know I'm not ready to try again, or when I will be, but we don't have to decide that now. Give yourself time

Vent re Dr

I know what you mean. I had a m/c, and even though I am pregnant now (16 weeks) it's very hard for me to go to the dr. I still even cry sometimes when I go. I'm sorry your OB was not very understanding or compassionate.