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Venting - You know when you start talking about the furture and then disagree...

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Question
LIF Adolescent

Member since 5/05

703 total posts

Name:

Venting - You know when you start talking about the furture and then disagree...

I'm not PG yet, but you know when you start talking about the furture and things.

Well, my hubby and I was talking and I brought up how I would register once I found out what we would be having. And he was like "first of all the first child should be a surprise. And the second baby you could find out." I said "No what I do for one, I'll do for both." And I also aksed, "What the big deal was of finding out and it would be nice to register for Chat Icon orChat Icon particular items/room ideas, etc."

He also added "We're not registering. What's the need." I told him "if people come to visit the baby wouldn't it be easier for them to buy things I may want/like/need." He said "you can buy them yourself or just return the things you don't like" And I was like "When?!!" "With a new baby!!"

And, we were talking about girl names and I love the name Julianna and wants it to be Italian and has to have it spelled Gulianna. I"m not crazy about the "G" - just my opinion, I hope I don't offend anyoneChat Icon

It just seems like I always have to give inChat Icon 'Am I wrong for thinking for feeling this way? Thank you for letting me vent.

Message edited 7/24/2006 2:49:59 PM.

Posted 7/24/06 2:45 PM
 
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RM23
LIF Adult

Member since 5/06

997 total posts

Name:
Rachel

Re: Venting - You know when you start talking about the furture and then disagree...

Not at all. I think the most important thing to remember is that marriage is about compromise, on both parts. You shouldnt have to always be the one to give in.

Posted 7/24/06 3:16 PM
 

Bebalina
<3

Member since 6/05

2922 total posts

Name:
N

Re: Venting - You know when you start talking about the furture and then disagree...

Posted by RM23

Not at all. I think the most important thing to remember is that marriage is about compromise, on both parts. You shouldnt have to always be the one to give in.

I agree... however i will say.... things like that he shouldnt mettle... spelling of the name you'll have to compromise
but as far as registering or finding out Chat Icon or Chat Icon i personally feel thats the mommys decision.

Posted 7/24/06 3:23 PM
 

pmpkn087
Life is good...

Member since 9/05

18504 total posts

Name:
Stephanie

Re: Venting - You know when you start talking about the furture and then disagree...

My opinion is that some of your decisions may change. I was always dead set against finding out the sex. But, when the time came down to it, I really wanted to know and couldn't wait, so we found out.

Also, as far as registering, I agree that you should definately register. If he would like for the two of you to buy the big things, that's fine...but there are LOADS of small things that add up. Some people love to give gifts off of registries and if you don't have one, they will decide for themselves what to get you. You could wind up with multiple things that you don't need or already have that you can't return for something you can use. So, once the time comes and he sees how much you really need and how overwhelming it can be, he may come around.



Chat Icon

Posted 7/24/06 3:57 PM
 

Question
LIF Adolescent

Member since 5/05

703 total posts

Name:

Re: Venting - You know when you start talking about the furture and then disagree...

Posted by pmpkn087

My opinion is that some of your decisions may change. I was always dead set against finding out the sex. But, when the time came down to it, I really wanted to know and couldn't wait, so we found out.

Also, as far as registering, I agree that you should definately register. If he would like for the two of you to buy the big things, that's fine...but there are LOADS of small things that add up. Some people love to give gifts off of registries and if you don't have one, they will decide for themselves what to get you. You could wind up with multiple things that you don't need or already have that you can't return for something you can use. So, once the time comes and he sees how much you really need and how overwhelming it can be, he may come around.



Chat Icon



I forgot to add the reason why he doesn't want to register its becasue he doesn't believe in buying things before the baby. But like I told him its not buying, its just on a list, nothings bought or will be in the house.

Posted 7/24/06 4:06 PM
 

DRMom
Two in Blue

Member since 5/05

20223 total posts

Name:
Melissa

Re: Venting - You know when you start talking about the furture and then disagree...

I would just tell my DH you're a man you don't know how it works. And if he doesn't want to have anything before the baby how would you have a shower?

Posted 7/24/06 4:20 PM
 

SweetestOfPeas
J'taime Paris!

Member since 3/06

32345 total posts

Name:

Re: Venting - You know when you start talking about the furture and then disagree...

Posted by Question

Posted by pmpkn087

My opinion is that some of your decisions may change. I was always dead set against finding out the sex. But, when the time came down to it, I really wanted to know and couldn't wait, so we found out.

Also, as far as registering, I agree that you should definately register. If he would like for the two of you to buy the big things, that's fine...but there are LOADS of small things that add up. Some people love to give gifts off of registries and if you don't have one, they will decide for themselves what to get you. You could wind up with multiple things that you don't need or already have that you can't return for something you can use. So, once the time comes and he sees how much you really need and how overwhelming it can be, he may come around.



Chat Icon



I forgot to add the reason why he doesn't want to register its becasue he doesn't believe in buying things before the baby. But like I told him its not buying, its just on a list, nothings bought or will be in the house.

if it makes him feel better, have all the items be send to your mom's or your MIL's instead of your house.

Posted 7/24/06 4:20 PM
 

Question
LIF Adolescent

Member since 5/05

703 total posts

Name:

Re: Venting - You know when you start talking about the furture and then disagree...

Posted by melijane

I would just tell my DH you're a man you don't know how it works. And if he doesn't want to have anything before the baby how would you have a shower?



We won't be having a shower - we both agree on that.

Posted 7/24/06 4:56 PM
 

DandN
Twins are here!

Member since 3/06

3597 total posts

Name:
Deirdre

Re: Venting - You know when you start talking about the furture and then disagree...

Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Possession is 9/10 of the law. If you are sharing a body with a baby, you can decide if you learn the sex before delivery!!!!

Posted 7/25/06 3:13 PM
 

dooodles
When you wish upon a star

Member since 5/05

11997 total posts

Name:
Because 2 people fell in love

Re: Venting - You know when you start talking about the furture and then disagree...

Many people do not believe in buying gifts before a baby even comes home from the hospital. Others also believe that registering should not be done either. While I wouldn't compromise on something you firmly believe in, you both need to discuss this more as time goes on. You both need to see how strongly the other one feels about his/her issues.

My SIL did not want to know the sex out of any of her 4 pg's. But my brother could not hold out, so he knew each time and kept it quiet. But all items needed were unisex. Chat Icon vs Chat Icon items will be bought after the baby is born anyway

Posted 7/25/06 3:36 PM
 
 

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