we are partly to blame....lets all make a change and stop giving corporate america our hard earned money!

(before i begin, let me say i understand this is not the case for everyone, alot of people are struggling due to MANY other reasons, but this is ONE thing that can be changed...and NEEDS to be!)

corporate america isnt the only one to blame.....WE ARE!

so many struggling people fall victim to the marketing ploys of these big corporations that we NEED this big expensive home, we NEED this latest piece of technology, we NEED this brand new car, etc....

i am guilty of it at times too. we have our wants and needs all confused.

i mean, i keep reading on facebook so many of my friends pre-ordered this new iphone....but a couple weeks ago were complaining about how broke they are?? REALLY?

why do we feel like we NEED these things?? i know back in the day many of our parents didnt have cable bills (they had basic cable) they didnt have 2 car payments (they ran a car into the ground till it couldnt be salvaged...but you bet they saved all along for the next car) My parents did eventually get cell phones and still do have them...but its the BASIC plan.....really, who needs to be in contact with the world on the internet 24/7? or have an app with this angry birds game? Credit cards? yes they had them....and used them for emergencies and worked extra hard to pay off any balance.

After talking to my parents about this i decided that I am going to go back to the way they lived back in the day.
my cell phone....its the one verizon had for free...no internet.
my car...its a 2004 and i treat it like a baby...i dont NEED a new car every 3 years like i thought i did.
cable....i could do basic....but i budget for a decent package and haggle my way to free movie channels.
credit card....proud to say i have no balance and only use it for emergencies...but there are times when i do have a balance but you bet me and my husband put in extra hours to make the money to pay it off asap.
my new kitchen i was saving for...you know what...my appliances work, the cabinets are ugly...but they serve their function, they hold my plates and dishes...even tho so many people have these kitchens i love, i dont NEED one. I will wait till my student loans are paid off and put my kitchen money towards the loans instead.

lets not GIVE our hard earned money away to these big corporations for things we dont NEED. Downsize to the basics and take that extra money you were throwing away to these big corporations and SAVE it or pay off debts.

Re: we are partly to blame....lets all make a change and stop giving corporate america our hard earned money!

I'm with ya sister. I haven't used a personal credit card in over 5 years. For anything.
I am a cash & carry FREAK.

Admittedly I was not always this way

I have a dumb phone, the most basic DISH package and my big techie splurge was my MacBook pro as a gift from DH last year. Paid in full at purchase.

We're moving into our house soon and I'll be brutal with each and every vendor/cable/utility deal I have to strike. I almost pity the customer service reps who are going to get me

Re: we are partly to blame....lets all make a change and stop giving corporate america our hard earned money!

Agree 100% here.

I work with this girl who came to my boss a few months ago and told him she needed a raise. It wasn't her time to get a raise (she wasn't here a year yet) she was making a decent salary that she negotiated when she started, but she told him she needed more money because "how am I supposed to afford my BMW or the watch I want. I deserve these things. I need these things. Why shouldn't I have them?"

I mean really? You NEED a BMW? You need a $1000 watch?

It is THIS attitude that I can't stand. I am not commenting on anything else- just THIS attitude of entitlement.

Re: we are partly to blame....lets all make a change and stop giving corporate america our hard earned money!

Re: we are partly to blame....lets all make a change and stop giving corporate america our hard earned money!

Re: we are partly to blame....lets all make a change and stop giving corporate america our hard earned money!

Re: we are partly to blame....lets all make a change and stop giving corporate america our hard earned money!

You'd be surprise how many people do live similarly to the way your/ our parents lived. You don't hear about b/c frankly saying I just got the brand new Iphone sounds a lot better than "hey i just got a free basic phone"

I look around my neighbor and the four years we have been here, everyone is still driving the same cars they had when we moved in. Not everyone goes on vacations every year. We go out in droves when there is something free is happening in our neighborhood.

And sure there are people who's goal in life is to keep up with the Jones. I do know of people like that, but they are the exception. What I hear and see on LIF isn't my real life experience. I truly believe that people do try to live within their means and some don't.

Re: we are partly to blame....lets all make a change and stop giving corporate america our hard earned money!

i see what you are saying.

and i totally agree with you that our wants and needs are screwed up.

for instance, i really really really want a sectional couch. but we don't NEED a new couch, the one we have (which was given to us by my parents who owned it since 1997) is perfectly fine, comfortable and goes with my decor. I just WANT the sectional.

But we need a new roof. NEED. So I have to shelf my WANT of a new couch to take care of our NEEDS.

I get what you are saying. but i think it takes a special person to actually go back to basics. to give up the materialistic lifestyle we are accustomed to (and lets face it, EXPECTED to have here on LI) will not be easy for most people.

i look at my 16 year old cousin who gets EVERYTHING she wants. She wants a Bentley (no way that's happening) but I'll bet she'll "settle" for the Jeep Grand Cherokee or BMW my aunt and uncle offer her instead. She expects these things. She has had a smart phone since age 13, new laptop, the best clothes, she attends Sweet 16's that rival my own wedding and she'll go to a costly private university when she graduates from St. Anthony's next year. She has no idea what reality is. Her and her friends that she tries to keep up with (my aunt & uncle are keeping up with her friends parents, too) will probably never get it.

Re: we are partly to blame....lets all make a change and stop giving corporate america our hard earned money!

You know what, this is how we have been living our life for a few years now and a lot of people think I'm crazy at times. They say "Don't you want a bigger kitchen?" "Wow, your car is a 2003?" They can't believe that I literally only have a few outfits and I mix and match. But we chose not to live beyond our means because we don't want the financial stress. If we don't have hte money right now for something, it doesn't get purchased. And we are much happier this way. There is less stress overall. Less for us to argue about!

I look at my siblings---one gets a new car every 3 years, her daughter's clothes are all from the Gap, Garnet Hill and Mini Boden, she gets her hair Japanese Straightened every few months. Her DH bought a new car and kept it out at his job and she didn't even know about it! All of these ridiculous expenses and what is it for? Keeping up with the Joneses? She isn't happier at the end of the day. In fact they have a lot of issues that they need to work through. All of these material things do not buy you happiness.

Re: we are partly to blame....lets all make a change and stop giving corporate america our hard earned money!

I agree with you, although I am partially guilty of some of these things. We do have smartphones, that I know I don't truly need, and we do have FIOS with lots of channels and a multiroom DVR...but no premium channels, like HBO.

It is always tempting to want to "keep up with the Jonses," but we do try to live within our means. I get frustrated sometimes when I see my friends totally redoing their homes, when I have a completely outdated kitchen and bathrooms. I always have to remind myself that a lot of these same people carry tons of credit card debt, and we're not willing to do that. I think that we are a spoiled generation in general. We expect to have the luxuries, rather than seeing them as a treat.

Like I said, I'm guilty of it (I get grouchy if I don't get to go on vacation every year), so I'm not faulting anyone, but I am trying to change my mentality and just be happy that we have jobs, a roof over our head, and food on our table.

Re: we are partly to blame....lets all make a change and stop giving corporate america our hard earned money!

I agree. I think especially in this area people have a hard time separating wants and needs. I see family members with teenagers and they don't have money but they feel they HAVE to give these kids things. My younger cousins had blackberries years before I got my iPhone and then when the iPhone was cool, they had to have iPhones. My cousin who is 12 years younger than I am had 3 or 4 coach bags given as gifts before I even had 1 of the 3 designer bags I have since saved for and bought myself. My clients are parents of teenagers and sickening how indulged these kids are sometimes. They will have no idea how to exist in the real world. I'm almost 30 years old and I have friends who drive cars that their parents pay for and talk on cell phones that are on their parents bills. They charge things on credit cards that get billed back to their parents. WHAT? Seriously?

I think it's fine to want to have nice things. When I started my job, I'm not going to lie, one of my motivations was I was going to save my money and in a few years trade in my car and buy a BMW in cash. Yeah, ok, that didn't happen. I still have an 11 year old car. What would have been wrong was if I had traded in my car to make the DP on the BMW and then gotten myself in over my head in car payments I can't afford. I think too many people do that. But wanting to make money to have nice things is not a bad problem. I hate my job some days, but I push myself, hoping to use my comission money toward our Disney trip.

Acknowledge that the entitlement is hard to break. We were told all of our lives go to school, get good grades, save your money and you will be able to buy a house, buy a new car, buy a big screen TV, whatever. We have to realize that that was a nice dream, but it's NOT reality, and that it's OK if you can't afford those things. My friends make fun of us because we have 2 TVs but they are ancient tube TVs that are easily 15+ years old. Do I have room on a credit card for a plasma TV? Yeah, probably, but I know I don't need it. I think we need to wrap our heads around that. It's not that easy though since we're a consumer society. We've been told our goal in life is consume. How many games are based on consumption? Look at The Sims. Once you get your career in order the main goal is to just buy nicer stuff to make your people happy. Farmville, etc all the same. We're spending so much time even acquiring virtual stuff.

I don't think it's evil to want stuff, but I definitely agree we sometimes need to take a step back and realize that financial secutiry is more important and putting a few grand in the bank is better than blowing it on the latest gadget. You can always buy the gadget later.

Re: we are partly to blame....lets all make a change and stop giving corporate america our hard earned money!

... but.... if people buy less stuff, companies don't need as many people, so there are more layoffs, and more unemployment....




2004?!?!? I *wish* I had a car that new! You must be living the high-life!

My truck is a 2000, and DW's car is a 2002....

Message edited 10/19/2011 11:11:04 AM.

Re: we are partly to blame....lets all make a change and stop giving corporate america our hard earned money!

Re: we are partly to blame....lets all make a change and stop giving corporate america our hard earned money!

Posted by GoldenRod

... but.... if people buy less stuff, companies don't need as many people, so there are more layoffs, and more unemployment....

IMAGE


2004?!?!? I *wish* I had a car that new! You must be living the high-life!

My truck is a 2000, and DW's car is a 2002....

Re: we are partly to blame....lets all make a change and stop giving corporate america our hard earned money!

One of my friends lives like this.

She does not have a job. Her income comes from her investments.

She has basic cable
While she did just purchase a "new" car (certified preowned) last year (cash), her previous one was a 1987
Her phone does not have call waiting or call voicemail
She has a basic, no frills verizon cell phone for emergencies.
She has DIAL UP internet FREE through the library
She rents her movies FREE through the library
Any exercise she could do at a gym, she does at home.
She brews her own iced tea
Extra things she wants throughout the year, she puts on her "wish list" and waits for holidays or her birthday
She devotes her time to writing screen plays, writing music, spending time with friends and family and volunteering.

P.S. Dial up would KILL me

Re: we are partly to blame....lets all make a change and stop giving corporate america our hard earned money!

I agree with everything you said.

I've been trying to change a lot of our habits recently. Before we had our DD 3 yrs ago we were WAY more free with our money, or lack thereof even. We now have a lot of credit card debt and it's all our own fault. Things are tighter then they need to be, had we been smarter about our money I wouldn't be stuck shelling out hundreds of dollars a month in credit card payments. We signed up with Debt Wise and created a payment plan and we should be 100% debt free (including our 2nd mortgage) in less than 5yrs. I am SO excited about that!! And it's funny, it feels SO good to have a plan of attack and to feel like you're making progress and reaching goals instead of just charging and not thinking about it. The joy of purchasing is fleeting, the guilt of now owing everyone money lasts forever!

My Rav4 is a 2007 and I LOVE it, works great, and we have no payments which is awesome. My DH drives a 10yr old Civic. Not an ideal car but it works so until it breaks beyond repair, we'll hang on to it.

I've been cutting coupons like a crazy lady and signing up for anything that can save me money. Using the Target Red Debt Card which saves 5% every time I shop, looking for deals on Living Social or other discount websites. We stopped eating out so much and now we eat out ONLY once on Saturday as a family and only at someplace affordable, that's our weekly treat. Otherwise, I plan my meals all week around what is on sale and I try to make extra and freeze it for a later meal. BEST things I spent money on.............the extra freezer in the garage and my $50 vacuum sealer. Absolutely indispensable and it's saving me a TON. LOVE it!!

The one thing we did splurge on was home entertainment. We don't go to the movies or go out to shows or anything "fun" so we wanted our home to be where we are together to relax and have fun. We spend A LOT of time in our den so we had saved for and bought a REALLY nice surround sound system and a REALLY nice big screen TV. But we paid in cash for all of it and we use the heck out it. We pay $110/mo for Direct TV and $18/mo for Netflix but we use the heck out of both as well. I don't regret purchasing those things because it's something we saved for and really appreciate and use all the time.

I will say, being more frugal and saving money and working towards getting out of debt really feels good. I feel like a better person, a person who is more in control of everything. I can't wait to get rid of the credit cards.........once we do, I'm cancelling all but one for emergencies. I learned my lesson, the hard way!! I like the idea of getting back to basics and focusing on family instead of trying to spend more and keep up with everyone else. I like kickin' it old school!

Re: we are partly to blame....lets all make a change and stop giving corporate america our hard earned money!

We purchased a new car in 2009 because we were able to take advantage of Cash for Clunkers for our 1991 Cadillac that was siphoning money out of us monthly. We paid off our Saturn Vue to do it. It was either buy a used car and keep the payment on the saturn or use the money to pay off the saturn and get the new car for similar amount of money. There wasn't much to choose from in the used car arena when we bought and 4500 towards a new car was better than we were ever going to negotiate a car down. We did good, paid less than book before the 4500 credit. It surprisingly cost us less to insure the new car too. And less in gas, the caddy required premium and drank gas like crazy. We get 4x the mileage out of the new car.

We have hit some bumps and are in higher debt than we want to be, but total CC debt is still less than the 10K average. We will be incurring more costs now since we are relocating off the island, but the long term for this move will be worth it.

I buy all our clothes on clearance. I am still wearing a lot of maternity shirts to work. I sniff out deals. I have us at under $400/mo for food.

We need to cut back in areas too. That is slowly happening, we are slowly changing our habits, but it's not easy.

We shop a lot at target too because of the 5% discount and the already cheaper prices.

Re: we are partly to blame....lets all make a change and stop giving corporate america our hard earned money!

Message edited 10/19/2011 11:55:44 AM.

Re: we are partly to blame....lets all make a change and stop giving corporate america our hard earned money!

Yeah, it's just me and DH and we spend about $100/wk

Re: we are partly to blame....lets all make a change and stop giving corporate america our hard earned money!

Re: we are partly to blame....lets all make a change and stop giving corporate america our hard earned money!

Re: we are partly to blame....lets all make a change and stop giving corporate america our hard earned money!

We buy a TON of frozen veggies. I have a small freezer just for veggies. They go on sale at Stop and Shop and I stock up when they're 4 for 5 or 10 for 10.

Meats I buy on sale or in bulk. Chicken breast at Costco is 1.99/lb and they're in freezable pkgs.

Lots of chicken. But we do eat our fair share of steaks too. I just get them on sale and freeze them.

I own a rice steamer. We eat a lot of rice LOL. Brown rice, wild rice blends, jasmine rice (my fav) bought from Walmart 10lb bag is less than 20 bux.

I buy cereals and staples from Walmart, BJ's, Target... I know prices well enough to know if I'm getting a deal.

Eggs are cheaper at BJ's/Costco.

I don't drink milk neither do my DD's so we save a ton right there. But I do buy yogurts and creamer and cheeses.

I buy generic if it's cheaper than the sale item. Some items I only buy on sale, like the occasional lamb shoulder chop or roast.

We don't eat a lot of convenience foods, and both DH and I brown bag our lunches.

That $400 doesn't include things like paper towels or hygiene items, it's strictly food.

DD2 has some food allergies, so finding finger foods for her is challenging and a bit more expensive. She has a wheat and milk allergy, foods free of those are pricy.

My highest grocery bill was about 180 and that was a 2 week supply of food.

Re: we are partly to blame....lets all make a change and stop giving corporate america our hard earned money!

HAHA, I Just read this thread, and wrote something similar on a new thread before reading this one..sorry.

Re: we are partly to blame....lets all make a change and stop giving corporate america our hard earned money!

Posted by Hofstra26

Posted by JenniferEver

Yeah, it's just me and DH and we spend about $100/wk

It's basically just me and DH too..........DD is only 3 and eats like a bird.

Question - When you say $100/wk on groceries is that just on food and drinks OR do also include things like paper towels, hairspray, tissues, laundry detergent, etc? If I don't count the toiletries, paper goods, and cleaning products I would be under $100/wk for sure but it's that stuff that always throws me off.

Re: we are partly to blame....lets all make a change and stop giving corporate america our hard earned money!