Re: What are your thoughts?

Posted by CookieMomster

Posted by Jbon630

Posted by CookieMomster

Posted by CrankyPants

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Posted by NervousNell

Next will be "discouraging" the epidural. Because someone dictates that a drug free birth is somehow better and makes you more of a hero.

I feel like handing out medals to all these heroes, just so I don't have to hear them talk about it anymore.

There would be the "Drug Free Birth" award (larger medals will be awarded based on the length of labor and degree of tearing)

The "My Baby Never Had a Drop of Formula" Award (larger medals will be awarded based on the number of foods you had to eliminate from your diet)

The "My Baby Never Had Food from a (gasp) Jar" Award. This medal comes in the shape of a Baby Bullet.

and let's not forget my personal favorite:

The "I Would Never Let my Baby CIO" Award. Most recipients will not be present to receive this medal because they fell asleep at their desks.

I just died a little with laughter. I would like to remind a few of you who are still 1-2 years into this, that us old timers, like myself have seen just how far that fall off your high horse is…..! I've been doing this parenting role for 6 years, and like a few of you felt my opinion with a 2 month old was clearly just as valid as someone with a 9 year old. Boy was I wrong, you will take short cuts as a parent, you will have a day where you need a break, you will have a day where you say SCREW IT, I'm ordering a pizza. Welcome to parenting, just when you form one opinion, one of your kid tosses a grenade your way and guess what…you end up seeing the other side of that opinion REAL QUICK.

So what if I'm already taking shortcuts at 6 months?

You're a fast learner

Honestly I hate that sanctimommy ********. You are not a better parent than me because you kept your infant in the room with you and I'm not a better parent than you because I got some rest.

We all do what's best for OUR families. To seriously undermine or try to make someone else feel like shit for their decision is so idiotic.

What are your thoughts?

Where i am from the baby is with the Mother from the minute he/she is born. After that if they are not fit to mind the baby the dad or someone else needs to be there. No choice at all.

Re: What are your thoughts?

same as everyone else. As a C-Section mom, there would be no way the first night I could get up and do feedings.

Re: What are your thoughts?

I see both sides; I wanted my 1st LO with me every moment, and was a little upset that family members were trying to talk me into sending him to the nursery every night. But I was exhausted the first night after laboring all day & ending up w a section. I sent him to the nursery that night & it was the best decision. DH & I were rested the next day & able to better care for him. I do get the idea of keeping the baby w you all the time, I just think it should absolutely be a choice.

What I don't get is tearing each other down for having different beliefs, making different decisions. I realize this site is for sharing experiences and we have different stories, but it's also for supporting each other as parents. We all care so much about our kids or we wouldn't come here to ask questions or talk about them in the first place. The fact that we make different decisions doesn't mean I care more than you do; it just means my idea of giving my child the best care may be different from yours.

Re: What are your thoughts?

I had two CS... there was no way I could jump out of bed to tend to a newborn every few hours in the middle of the night by myself (DH went home every night at my instance so he could get some sleep before there was no sleep). I had my babies with me from about 5am until 9:30pm... then I rested which with a CS is much needed.

I don't begrudge anyone time spent with or without your child while in the hospital RECOVERING from having just had said child.

What are your thoughts?

I'm a C/S mom. Wish she was with me the whole time. I don't think it would have mattered to me. That said, to be told she HAD to no matter what, seems a bit over the top.

I distinctly recall that first time going home thinking "OMG what do I do while I sleep? Who takes care of her!?" I felt confused, lost, alone and scared. I don't have family in NY and his family was not around in the beginning.

I had my Dad (thank god) but honestly I wish I had taken more time to ask questions, be with her and get over my fear those first 4 or so days. Not saying it would have helped, but not saying it would have hurt either.

I know I had her with me when ever I could. They took her for certain times (I guess to be sure we slept). I kept her to the very last moment. So much so that the nurses knew she'd be the last one back. I was the last stop of the night and I never let them take her, I'd walk her myself to the nursery.

I held her and talked to her at all hours of the day and night. 3 am feedings ? no biggie, I don't care what time it was, wake me up... she's mine. Altho I feel I spent a lot of time with her then, yes I always feel I could have used more.

ETA: I think my c/s may be different since it was so early in the morning. I was definitely up and able that night. I didn't get a choice given my medical condition and by the time I asked for her that first night she was asleep and already fed. I do very much so regret not having her that first night (overnight early morning am hours)

Message edited 11/25/2013 4:00:30 PM.

Re: What are your thoughts?

Not being snarky, Just wondering how many of you rooming in moms then put baby in daycare 12 hours a day at 2/3 months old? Not against such a scenario at ALL because of course you should do what works for you and your family...and oh wait that must apply to the rest of us too. I am just sincerely wondering how you justify that kind of separation as ok? Because the most sanctimonious attachment patenting moms I know in real life all work outside the home which has me

Hopefully all the time I spend at home as a SAHM mom makes up for that stint in the nursery!

Again not a dig at working moms...if daycare x3 wasn't so prohibitive I would be one myself....just a dig on convenient logic.

Message edited 11/26/2013 11:18:03 PM.

Re: What are your thoughts?

With my first I had them keep him overnight. The nurses actually encouraged me to keep him in the nursery. This was almost 5 years ago. I thought I would get some sleep, but I was so wrong. I had a roomate who had a C-section and was having issues. I hardly got any sleep either night. They also gave him bottles in the nursery which really screwed up his latch for a while. I was BF. I was a real emotional mess after having my first.So him going to the nursery was the right thing for me at the time.

Had my second at a different hospital a little under 2 years ago. They encourage rooming with baby at all times. They didn't even ask me if I wanted them to take the baby for the night. This time I wanted him with me at all times. I had a private room, which made all the difference. Plus my second time around I was more relaxed and loved having him.

I'm surpised anyone really got any sleep while staying in the hospital. Both times I hardly slept. It didn't matter if I had a roomate or no roomate. Baby in room or in nursery. It is hard to sleep in a hospital.

With all of that said, I think the decision should be up to the mother. I think it is okay for the hosptial to encourage baby to be with you in the room, but you should have the option.

Message edited 11/27/2013 12:28:40 AM.

Re: What are your thoughts?

Posted by MommyX3

Not being snarky, Just wondering how many of you rooming in moms then put baby in daycare 12 hours a day at 2/3 months old? Not against such a scenario at ALL because of course you should do what works for you and your family...and oh wait that must apply to the rest of us too. I am just sincerely wondering how you justify that kind of separation as ok? Because the most sanctimonious attachment patenting moms I know in real life all work outside the home which has me

Hopefully all the time I spend at home as a SAHM mom makes up for that stint in the nursery!

Again not a dig at working moms...if daycare x3 wasn't so prohibitive I would be one myself....just a dig on convenient logic.

Re: What are your thoughts?

That's kind of a poor analogy. Sending a newborn to the nursery is a choice (barring a medical reason). Going to work for most people is not a choice, it is a means to survive.

Re: What are your thoughts?

Stonybrook was like this I just gave birth in March

Re: What are your thoughts?

So many moms on this site are condesending and just plain nasty and I always say the same thing--it is a reflection of THEIR insecurities.

I do not care how others raise their children so long as they are loved, fed, have a safe home--do what works for you. Working with kids I see REAL abuse and neglect and find this ******** laughable!

room in or out for two days changes NOTHING.

Stay at home with your kid or work changes NOTHING

Formula or BF changes NOTHING

Children that know they are loved thrive even if the parenting styles may differ

Message edited 11/27/2013 10:04:11 AM.

Re: What are your thoughts?

First delivery, my roommate and I agreed to send the babies to nursery by midnight so we could sleep second delivery, I tried to keep baby in the room as did my roommate. Both babies were sent to the nursery around 2 AM after keeping us up all night! NSHU now has single rooms, but not the case several years ago. I got up at times to check on the babies, of course they were sleeping Peacefully in the nursery. I had c sections , but either way they would have been on nursery.

It's purely a money / business issue. The hospital doesn't give a crap about bonding or BF. They want to make $$$

I was with my babies 24/7 after we left the hospital and stayed home with them. Those few hours In the nursery didn't matter.

Message edited 12/3/2013 1:53:23 PM.

Re: What are your thoughts?

Re: What are your thoughts?

Re: What are your thoughts?

Posted by MommyX3

Not being snarky, Just wondering how many of you rooming in moms then put baby in daycare 12 hours a day at 2/3 months old? Not against such a scenario at ALL because of course you should do what works for you and your family...and oh wait that must apply to the rest of us too. I am just sincerely wondering how you justify that kind of separation as ok? Because the most sanctimonious attachment patenting moms I know in real life all work outside the home which has me

Hopefully all the time I spend at home as a SAHM mom makes up for that stint in the nursery!

Again not a dig at working moms...if daycare x3 wasn't so prohibitive I would be one myself....just a dig on convenient logic.