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What is with Peds recommending CIO and stopping night feedings so early?
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Mommy2Boys
My Boys!!!!
Member since 6/06 14437 total posts
Name:
C
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What is with Peds recommending CIO and stopping night feedings so early?
I see posts on here constantly lately with peds recommending starting CIO so early and even peds recommending to stop night time feedings as early as 8 weeks. Why are they rushing it??? Did CIO even exist years ago???
I'm not against CIO or stopping night time feedings but not until 6+ months. Before than I feel that the babies dont really understand and they are growing so quickly they truely need to be fed during the night if they are waking up hungry.
Some of these peds recommendations really annoy me...it seems like everything they recommend these days is purely for convenience. Hellooooo, having a baby and taking care of a baby isnt supposed to be about convenience because it's the farthest thing from it 
Message edited 7/24/2010 6:43:44 PM.
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Posted 7/24/10 6:43 PM  |
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mommyIam
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Shana
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Re: What is with Peds recommending CIO and stopping night feedings so early?
JMO... no flames no drama
Doctors, and DH is one, so I speak from experience, don't have time to take care of their kids. They don't have time/energy to talk or play with and to them. Doctors work really long terrible hours and take their work home in most cases. Its tough. They have no idea what it is to be up all night with a baby, because chances are, they are sleeping or working. Male or Female, either the other spouse does it, or they hire someone, or they will be one of the few doctors who will be against CIO. These are not necessarily the good doctors because chances are they probably did a lot of shortcuts at work to be home with their kids.
The last few times I handed DS to DH, he put him to sleep. Or he takes him in a stroller ride to put him to sleep. I understand that his idea of spending time with baby is watching him sleep for 10 minutes and then going to his laptop to work. And I understand he needs to get work done. And I only demand he spend a few hours with him on the weekend 1 on 1 - and some weekends it doesn't even get to happen because he'll be on call.
My point is DH has no idea what I put in, in night feedings, how exactly I weaned DS off the night bottle, how I helped DS learn to fall asleep on his own. How letting him cry is not how I do it, and is not right for DS.
If he were a ped, and patient came to him, I'm 100% sure he'd recommend CIO and think that their baby was crazy cause DS falls asleep so easily (after my hard work). He's not a bad father or a bad doctor. They just don't have that instinct that comes from hours and hours and sleep deprived hours consoling a screaming newborn baby.
I said this twice today, I'll say it again, there is nothing nothing nothing in the research that can prove one way or the other (scientifically that is) that there is any harm with CIO at any age, as long as baby is gaining weight and otherwise healthy.
But what is in the data, is that the earlier you sleep train, the more successful it is, and the likelihood for developing sleep problems later in life are significantly diminished. For a doctor this is enough to recommend it.
eta: some corrections because this was a vent for me, I'm so livid about DH working another weekend  and the few hours that he had with DS he rocked him to sleep, ughh!!!
Message edited 7/24/2010 7:36:22 PM.
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| Posted 7/24/10 7:25 PM |
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KennysMommy
Never knew LOVE like it before
Member since 3/10 2640 total posts
Name:
Danielle
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Re: What is with Peds recommending CIO and stopping night feedings so early?
My ped didn't have "that talk" with me until last week at DS's 9 month appt. Before that, she told me that he still needs comfort and or to be nursed if he's asking for it.
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| Posted 7/24/10 7:41 PM |
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NinaLemon
It's a boy!!!
Member since 10/07 6453 total posts
Name:
Jeannine
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Re: What is with Peds recommending CIO and stopping night feedings so early?
For me, I go very much with instinct with everything I do for DS. The advice from our PED was when putting DS to sleep up until 6 weeks to not let him cry for more than 5 mins, from 6-8 weeks it was 10 minutes, after 8 weeks it increased to 15 min.
I listen to my PED, but like I said before I use my own instinct. When a baby is that young it physically hurts a Mom to hear him/her cry, I think that is biology telling us our baby needs us. I listen to my body. DS woke up to be nursed until he was about 9 or 10 months old. Up until 8 months I nursed him to sleep, I knew this wasn't good so I did have to help him learn to self-soothe. I did it by creating a routine and letting him fuss for 15 minutes at a time, in a few days he started going right to sleep on his own. It still made me anxious to let him cry those 15 minutes, but I knew it was my guilt not him being in trouble and I knew he'd be OK. DS is a great sleeper, and I never did CIO, I followed his lead and listened to my instincts. I don't think I could stay with a PED who made suggestions which go against my instincts.
I'm not sure I buy in to the idea that Dr.'s are too busy to know what really is going on with taking care of a baby. It is the job of the Dr to know, if you go into pediatrics you better know. I wouldn't want to belong to a practice where my Dr. was so busy he/she didn't get family time, if they are that busy I would assume they aren't very well rested and probably aren't on top of their game when treating my child. Thankfully I have a PED who keeps her practice to a manageable size, and she encourages parents to trust their instincts, she is very no nonsense and always puts the children first. She was my PED growing up and I feel very comfortable having her take care of my son.
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| Posted 7/24/10 8:29 PM |
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nov04libride
big brother <3
Member since 5/05 14672 total posts
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Me
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Re: What is with Peds recommending CIO and stopping night feedings so early?
Posted by momytobein2010
I said this twice today, I'll say it again, there is nothing nothing nothing in the research that can prove one way or the other (scientifically that is) that there is any harm with CIO at any age, as long as baby is gaining weight and otherwise healthy.
There is research (and I have a doctorate in a sociology-related field, so this is the psychological aspect, not medical) that shows that babies whose cries are ignored early on have more socialization issues, and in life have more issues both relating to and depending on others.
Is your DH still a resident? All the doctors I know who finished their residencies don't have as crazy lives (some still crazy, but not as bad as resident hours); my ex is now a dermatologist who works 3 10-hour days a week. Not a bad gig.
I feel like parents come in at their wits' end, having gotten no sleep, and peds. feel like they need to give an answer to help. And CIO is better than having abusive parents.
It worries me that it seems like whenever a parent goes in saying that their baby cries too much, the ped. says reflux. It feels like 75% of babies on the boards are on meds or special formula for reflux.
Message edited 7/24/2010 8:40:50 PM.
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| Posted 7/24/10 8:38 PM |
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mamabear
LIF Adult
Member since 3/08 4539 total posts
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Re: What is with Peds recommending CIO and stopping night feedings so early?
My guess, from what I have seen, is that the docs see a lot of parents who are overwhelmed, overtired and asking for advice on how to get a baby to sleep more. So, they assume that is what you want, and therefore start saying, "the baby can sleep through the night now". It's probably true medically that at a certain point a baby does not physically need to eat during the night. But I think there are more emotional issues a baby is still developing. My ped recently told me I could wean night feedings, maybe try just giving a paci, etc. I said, it's actually easier for me to continue to feed her. I love the bonding time especially now that I am back at work, hate pumping and dont want to have to pump more during the day, or get up during the night to pump, and feel generally fine despite the lack of sleep. The doc then said, oh, if you don't mind it certainly keep feeding at night. When you need your sleep and are tired of it, then we can talk about how to go about it. So...I think doc's assume a default, but if you express some interest otherwise, they don't enc.ourage CIO
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| Posted 7/24/10 9:40 PM |
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cjik
Welcome 2010!
Member since 2/06 8879 total posts
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Re: What is with Peds recommending CIO and stopping night feedings so early?
Mine did not recommend it until DS was 6 months, we didn't try it until he was about 7 or 8. He slept through the night off and on from about 4 months on though, so I can't say I was desperate for sleep.
I don't know abouot peds recommending it earlier, but I do think I see more and more posts about people doing CIO (or thinking of it) with very young babies--funny how everything changes so quickly in the parenting world. Just a few years ago, I really don't remember seeing anyone talking about doing it with newborns or slightly older babies.
My gut tells me 6 months is a good marker--not based on any scientific research, just my own feeligns about what young babies need from their parents.
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| Posted 7/24/10 10:05 PM |
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KartveliT
...
Member since 1/08 8363 total posts
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Re: What is with Peds recommending CIO and stopping night feedings so early?
I agree with the OP....
I never asked or spoke to my ped about CIO or nighttime feeding. I went with my instinct and intuition when it came to things like this and honestly I wouldn't have done CIO even if the ped had told me to do it (don't flame or judge anyone who has done it or is doing it) it's just not something we wanted to do.
Message edited 7/24/2010 11:54:08 PM.
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| Posted 7/24/10 11:53 PM |
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Jacksmommy
My love muffin!
Member since 1/07 5819 total posts
Name:
Liz
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Re: What is with Peds recommending CIO and stopping night feedings so early?
I am pretty sure several of US had to CIO at a young age. Just like we wereput on our bellies to sleep, given food to eat at a young age etc etc. I am also sure that aside from this board, there are several people that DO let their children CIO at a young age - especially if their pedz suggest it. Alot of old school peds still go with old school theories.
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| Posted 7/25/10 12:52 AM |
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monkeybride
My Everything
Member since 5/05 20541 total posts
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Re: What is with Peds recommending CIO and stopping night feedings so early?
Posted by tatuka
I agree with the OP....
I never asked or spoke to my ped about CIO or nighttime feeding. I went with my instinct and intuition when it came to things like this and honestly I wouldn't have done CIO even if the ped had told me to do it (don't flame or judge anyone who has done it or is doing it) it's just not something we wanted to do.
Same. I probably would mention my tough times with my kids and their sleep but never in a way that I asked for advice.
My peds never recommended CIO. I don't think I would really like it if they did.
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| Posted 7/25/10 12:53 AM |
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DRMom
Two in Blue
Member since 5/05 20223 total posts
Name:
Melissa
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Re: What is with Peds recommending CIO and stopping night feedings so early?
I ALWAYS trust mmy own feelings about what type of Mom I want to be over my ped's advice. Luckily, I've used great Dr's that tell me what the "norm" is but don't encourage one way or the other. I fed my kids at night until they were 9 months. Then for two nights I went in and soothed them when they cried but no bottles. After that they were fine.
We actually have two Dr's we see now. A big ped practice we use when they are sick as well as a family Dr who is big into attachment parenting and very nurturing so I have the best of both worlds I think
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| Posted 7/25/10 9:08 AM |
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DRMom
Two in Blue
Member since 5/05 20223 total posts
Name:
Melissa
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Re: What is with Peds recommending CIO and stopping night feedings so early?
Posted by nov04libride
Posted by momytobein2010
I said this twice today, I'll say it again, there is nothing nothing nothing in the research that can prove one way or the other (scientifically that is) that there is any harm with CIO at any age, as long as baby is gaining weight and otherwise healthy.
There is research (and I have a doctorate in a sociology-related field, so this is the psychological aspect, not medical) that shows that babies whose cries are ignored early on have more socialization issues, and in life have more issues both relating to and depending on others.
Is your DH still a resident? All the doctors I know who finished their residencies don't have as crazy lives (some still crazy, but not as bad as resident hours); my ex is now a dermatologist who works 3 10-hour days a week. Not a bad gig.
I feel like parents come in at their wits' end, having gotten no sleep, and peds. feel like they need to give an answer to help. And CIO is better than having abusive parents.
It worries me that it seems like whenever a parent goes in saying that their baby cries too much, the ped. says reflux. It feels like 75% of babies on the boards are on meds or special formula for reflux.
As a Mom who's baby had horrible reflux due to a milk allergy I just want to say-reflux is always thought to have existed except it used to be called "colic" and there was NO CURE! I do not believe in every baby being on zantac or pevacid but I do believe many of these babies have milk sensitivity/allergy and once that is handled they would be fine. However it is very expensive to feed your baby special formula-thats a whole nother post though
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| Posted 7/25/10 9:12 AM |
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mommyIam
Member since 7/09 9209 total posts
Name:
Shana
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Re: What is with Peds recommending CIO and stopping night feedings so early?
Posted by nov04libride
There is research (and I have a doctorate in a sociology-related field, so this is the psychological aspect, not medical) that shows that babies whose cries are ignored early on have more socialization issues, and in life have more issues both relating to and depending on others.
yes, your right, but not with regards to CIO specifically. CIO is not meant to be done every day, its meant to work the first or second time. I did more of kind of a fuss it out, it took 2 weeks to get DS to STTN, and he still fusses from time to time (teething and what not). But I often wonder whats worse to let them fuss a lot, or let them cry a little.
Posted by nov04libride
Is your DH still a resident? All the doctors I know who finished their residencies don't have as crazy lives (some still crazy, but not as bad as resident hours); my ex is now a dermatologist who works 3 10-hour days a week. Not a bad gig.
he's not, but it was grueling for him. His a GI with surgical specialty, so it may be a little different than Dermatology. I can't tell you how many times he's had to get up in the middle of the night and run to the hospital, he's an attending now he works 10 hours a day, 5-6 days a week (he loves his work, and I totally am so proud of him). Our friend is a MD Radiologist, he has paid 2 month vacation, and works 2 days a week, so beat that. Not all doctors specialties are the same. My guess is that pediatrics is somewhere in between, but I honestly don't know.
Posted by nov04libride
I feel like parents come in at their wits' end, having gotten no sleep, and peds. feel like they need to give an answer to help. And CIO is better than having abusive parents.
I completely agree with this! Medicine is a service field too, doctors want to please and satisfy your customers.
Posted by nov04libride
It worries me that it seems like whenever a parent goes in saying that their baby cries too much, the ped. says reflux. It feels like 75% of babies on the boards are on meds or special formula for reflux.
Me Too! With DH being a GI, I asked him a million times does DS have reflux? His response, was "yes, all babies do, some have worse, but they all have built in protection from it, and most do not need to be medicated" - but he also always says, "I'm not a ped, I can't make a real recommendation for another child without seeing them, but DS definitely doesn't have anything that needs medication" Some minor changes really helped us. (bottles, formula, exercises, chamomile!)
nov04libride, I really respect your response to mine, I wish there could be more discussion like this on everything. I love how everyone is so helpful here, but I would love it too if we can learn and educate each other without judgment.
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| Posted 7/25/10 12:10 PM |
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LoveyQ
Stalkers, get a life.
Member since 11/07 12820 total posts
Name:
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Re: What is with Peds recommending CIO and stopping night feedings so early?
Posted by momytobein2010
JMO... no flames no drama
Doctors, and DH is one, so I speak from experience, don't have time to take care of their kids. They don't have time/energy to talk or play with and to them. Doctors work really long terrible hours and take their work home in most cases. Its tough. They have no idea what it is to be up all night with a baby, because chances are, they are sleeping or working. Male or Female, either the other spouse does it, or they hire someone, or they will be one of the few doctors who will be against CIO. These are not necessarily the good doctors because chances are they probably did a lot of shortcuts at work to be home with their kids.
The last few times I handed DS to DH, he put him to sleep. Or he takes him in a stroller ride to put him to sleep. I understand that his idea of spending time with baby is watching him sleep for 10 minutes and then going to his laptop to work. And I understand he needs to get work done. And I only demand he spend a few hours with him on the weekend 1 on 1 - and some weekends it doesn't even get to happen because he'll be on call.
My point is DH has no idea what I put in, in night feedings, how exactly I weaned DS off the night bottle, how I helped DS learn to fall asleep on his own. How letting him cry is not how I do it, and is not right for DS.
If he were a ped, and patient came to him, I'm 100% sure he'd recommend CIO and think that their baby was crazy cause DS falls asleep so easily (after my hard work). He's not a bad father or a bad doctor. They just don't have that instinct that comes from hours and hours and sleep deprived hours consoling a screaming newborn baby.
I said this twice today, I'll say it again, there is nothing nothing nothing in the research that can prove one way or the other (scientifically that is) that there is any harm with CIO at any age, as long as baby is gaining weight and otherwise healthy.
But what is in the data, is that the earlier you sleep train, the more successful it is, and the likelihood for developing sleep problems later in life are significantly diminished. For a doctor this is enough to recommend it.
eta: some corrections because this was a vent for me, I'm so livid about DH working another weekend and the few hours that he had with DS he rocked him to sleep, ughh!!!
JMO and no flames here, but just as with everything in life, this does not apply to all doctors. My BFF is a Ped, worked 24 hour shifts every 3 days as a resident, etc etc and has 2 kids. Yet she was the one getting up with the kids in the middle of the night, attended to their every need day and night when she was with them and really is the one that knows about all of the kids' needs. Her DH is not as hands on as she is, and he's NOT a doctor. Of course, this is just one example, but just goes to show that a lot of it has to do with the specialty that the doctor has, and also the type of person and how they handle things etc.
That said, DS's pediatric GI doctor told us that at 4 months and 12 lbs, he was big enough to STTN and that we should not feed him in the middle of the night. He did not specifically say to let him cry all night, but we inferred that since we told him that DS would wake up crying to eat. Then when we spoke to DS's ped the next day, he said that with all due respect to the GI, that DS was still too young and too little to CIO. So a lot of it is the doctor's personal opinion and their own experience and preference, in my opinion.
We as parents have to do with what we are most comfortable with. My co-worker has 2 DD's and she said she let them CIO at a few weeks old and that it worked for her. She said her mother told her to just let her cry and that she only had to do it one or two nights. I personally don't agree with that and she is now pregnant with #3 and says that she'll wait until 4 months to CIO this time.
Posted by momytobein2010
or they will be one of the few doctors who will be against CIO. These are not necessarily the good doctors because chances are they probably did a lot of shortcuts at work to be home with their kids.
And this in particular I think is an unfair assessment of doctors who are against CIO or who don't recommend it.
Message edited 7/25/2010 2:55:21 PM.
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| Posted 7/25/10 2:49 PM |
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Disneygirl
Disney cruise bound!
Member since 5/05 8126 total posts
Name:
D
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Re: What is with Peds recommending CIO and stopping night feedings so early?
Just wanted to add from reading some of the OP's that most advice coming from a doctor/health care professional come from their clinical experience not their personal experiences. I know for a fact my pediatrician does not have children so I when I get her professional opinion it's not from what she did with her kids but based on all her years of experience in pediatrics. Frankly all I think personal experience does is give a doctor the ability to empathize. And also doctors are not Gods that have all the answers, they give their best advice based on the knowledge they have. It might not always be what's best for your child sometimes a parent just needs to follow their instinct.
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| Posted 7/25/10 4:10 PM |
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mommyIam
Member since 7/09 9209 total posts
Name:
Shana
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Re: What is with Peds recommending CIO and stopping night feedings so early?
Posted by LoveyQ
Posted by momytobein2010
or they will be one of the few doctors who will be against CIO. These are not necessarily the good doctors because chances are they probably did a lot of shortcuts at work to be home with their kids.
And this in particular I think is an unfair assessment of doctors who are against CIO or who don't recommend it.
You're right, and looking at this now, I am sorry and apologize if I offended anyone. I was partially venting and mad that DH hardly got any time these past few weeks with DS. I just don't know how other doctors do their jobs and have time. DH is running around between 3 hospitals, teaches, give lectures, and is so incredibly busy he always brings his work home. I do my best to take care of him, make sure he's eating and sleeping right. And I notice he just doesn't get the first thing about how to meet DS's needs.
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| Posted 7/25/10 5:02 PM |
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LoveyQ
Stalkers, get a life.
Member since 11/07 12820 total posts
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Re: What is with Peds recommending CIO and stopping night feedings so early?
Posted by momytobein2010
Posted by LoveyQ
Posted by momytobein2010
or they will be one of the few doctors who will be against CIO. These are not necessarily the good doctors because chances are they probably did a lot of shortcuts at work to be home with their kids.
And this in particular I think is an unfair assessment of doctors who are against CIO or who don't recommend it.
You're right, and looking at this now, I am sorry and apologize if I offended anyone. I was partially venting and mad that DH hardly got any time these past few weeks with DS. I just don't know how other doctors do their jobs and have time. DH is running around between 3 hospitals, teaches, give lectures, and is so incredibly busy he always brings his work home. I do my best to take care of him, make sure he's eating and sleeping right. And I notice he just doesn't get the first thing about how to meet DS's needs.
Honestly, if I were in your shoes, I would feel the same way. I just wanted to point out that there are great doctors out there who are also great parents. Being a great parent means different things to different people. I'm sorry your DH is very busy with work, it sounds like he has a lot on his plate. Maybe it has to do with his specialty?
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| Posted 7/25/10 5:15 PM |
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