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CaseyGirl
Mommy to 3 Boys :)
Member since 5/05 19978 total posts
Name:
Jen - counting my blessings...
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Parents making comments about your money...
Do your parents ever put their 2 cents in (no pun intended hah hah) about you and DH's money?
My parents will once in a while question why we bought something or whatever, but what irked me was when we told my MIL that we bought a pool and we were very excited, she was like "oh you guys, you should have just saved your money, the two of you are big spenders, etc etc". 
Well, I will admit, we both do like nice things. However, it is not out of control. I am sure we'll have to cut back when we have kids. But I think what we spend is our business. It just really bugged me...
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Posted 6/6/06 8:03 AM  |
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Long Island Weddings
Long Island's Largest Bridal Resource |
2PreciousBlessings
The Perfect Pair
Member since 5/06 19861 total posts
Name:
Best Wife & Mommy
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Re: Parents making comments about your money...
Our parents do make comments about our spending habits but we just laugh it off because we both know that they do not mean any harm by what they say. We do not have any children as yet so we feel we need to do whatever we want at this point in our lives.
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| Posted 6/6/06 8:06 AM |
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LisaW
Time for me to FLY!
Member since 5/05 13199 total posts
Name:
Did I ever tell you that I hate people?
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Re: Parents making comments about your money...
My mom loves to do this to me. She'll make a comment that we have the full cable pkg (yeah, we don't do anything else!!), or when she saw the Marc Jacobs bag DH bought me for Valentine's Day, she said, Oh, it must be nice to be rich!!
The strange thing is that my parents are pretty well off and my mom lacks for nothing!!!!!
Message edited 6/6/2006 8:07:54 AM.
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| Posted 6/6/06 8:07 AM |
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MsMBV
:P
Member since 5/05 28602 total posts
Name:
Me
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Re: Parents making comments about your money...
Yes
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| Posted 6/6/06 8:22 AM |
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LSP2005
Bunny kisses are so cute!
Member since 5/05 19457 total posts
Name:
L
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Re: Parents making comments about your money...
Both sets of our parents ask us what we paid for everything. I think they know I like to comparison shop before I buy anything so they don't really say you spent to much. But your comment struck me MRS TC, I think that children are expensive and I am not sure how one would "cut back" after having them. I thought that children cost $$$. I don't mean to sound insensitive, if I do I am sorry, but how are you planning on cutting back after you have children?
For us, we figured we would spend some $$$ now on things we wanted but realized that after we have children we won't be able to spend as much on our wants because we will have to take care of our kids. Is that what you meant?
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| Posted 6/6/06 8:30 AM |
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MrsPorkChop
Twinning!!
Member since 5/05 9941 total posts
Name:
Missy
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Re: Parents making comments about your money...
yes.
unfortunately its their job to do so...
you are better off not saying anything until necessary
its your money and you can do what you want...i definitely do!
try not ot let it bother you
and CONGRATS on the pool! thats awesome!!!!!!!!!
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| Posted 6/6/06 8:49 AM |
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MrsPorkChop
Twinning!!
Member since 5/05 9941 total posts
Name:
Missy
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Re: Parents making comments about your money...
Posted by LSP2005
Both sets of our parents ask us what we paid for everything. I think they know I like to comparison shop before I buy anything so they don't really say you spent to much. But your comment struck me MRS TC, I think that children are expensive and I am not sure how one would "cut back" after having them. I thought that children cost $$$. I don't mean to sound insensitive, if I do I am sorry, but how are you planning on cutting back after you have children?
For us, we figured we would spend some $$$ now on things we wanted but realized that after we have children we won't be able to spend as much on our wants because we will have to take care of our kids. Is that what you meant?
i think she meant that she likes nice things and doesnt mind spending $ on them, but once she has kids, the kids will come first, before the nice or material things..
i believe that is what she meant b/c thats how i took it (edited for spelling)
Message edited 6/6/2006 8:51:30 AM.
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| Posted 6/6/06 8:50 AM |
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Shanti
True love
Member since 6/05 12653 total posts
Name:
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Re: Parents making comments about your money...
My parents, no; MIL, yes
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| Posted 6/6/06 10:08 AM |
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Beth
The Key to your new home....
Member since 2/06 24849 total posts
Name:
Beth
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Re: Parents making comments about your money...
My Dad doesn't- and he never would- he feels it's none of his business and it's not
my inlaws are another story- my FIL harbors a deep resentment towards my DH- he is jealous that he is more successful then him at such a young age
he has made comments about my ring and Jake watch- and they called me high maintaince
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| Posted 6/6/06 10:12 AM |
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MrsRbk
<3 <3 <3 <3
Member since 1/06 19197 total posts
Name:
Michelle
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Re: Parents making comments about your money...
Posted by preshy7
Posted by LSP2005
Both sets of our parents ask us what we paid for everything. I think they know I like to comparison shop before I buy anything so they don't really say you spent to much. But your comment struck me MRS TC, I think that children are expensive and I am not sure how one would "cut back" after having them. I thought that children cost $$$. I don't mean to sound insensitive, if I do I am sorry, but how are you planning on cutting back after you have children?
For us, we figured we would spend some $$$ now on things we wanted but realized that after we have children we won't be able to spend as much on our wants because we will have to take care of our kids. Is that what you meant?
i think she meant that she likes nice things and doesnt mind spending $ on them, but once she has kids, the kids will come first, before the nice or material things..
i believe that is what she meant b/c thats how i took it (edited for spelling)
I think that's what she means too. DH and I like nice things and like to do lots of nice things too (vacations, nice dinners, etc...) BUT we know that after we have kids, their needs and wants will come before ours.
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| Posted 6/6/06 10:15 AM |
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Pumpkin
LIF Adult
Member since 5/05 3353 total posts
Name:
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Re: Parents making comments about your money...
my parents dont know anything about our finances and I like it htat way. they have no idea what i make or dh makes, they know we pay our bills, they know DH is good with money and has taught me to be better with it. They do not make comments about anything regarding money. I have friends who father does their taxes which would make me so uncomfortable. To each their own but I wouldnt like that.
MIL never
FIL no, his wife, has made comments, i have poltiely said that i dont rememeber asking her to pay for it.
Message edited 6/6/2006 10:17:13 AM.
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| Posted 6/6/06 10:16 AM |
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Beth
The Key to your new home....
Member since 2/06 24849 total posts
Name:
Beth
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Re: Parents making comments about your money...
[
I think that's what she means too. DH and I like nice things and like to do lots of nice things too (vacations, nice dinners, etc...) BUT we know that after we have kids, their needs and wants will come before ours.
I agree- this is what we plan on doing also- we will cut back on certain things- or just do different things- a week in disney instead of a long weekend in South beach
but for now- we want to enjoy a first years as being married and buying things we want and going on nice trips- b/c it's all going to change when we have kids
my parents were the same way-
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| Posted 6/6/06 10:18 AM |
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BaroqueMama
Chase is one!
Member since 5/05 27530 total posts
Name:
me
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Re: Parents making comments about your money...
My parents have gotten a lot better about this. Once we got married, they stopped having much to say to us about our finances. I think they felt it was their job, and it was, to steer me in the right direction on all accounts, including financial, so they did. Over and over and over again But honestly, it kept me being honest with myself about money, so I didn't care. They wouldn't judge me, persay, but they would definitely help me to question certain purchases or whatever debts I had. But like I said, now, they stay out of our financial lives. They're good. They know their place now
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| Posted 6/6/06 10:20 AM |
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nrthshgrl
It goes fast. Pay attention.
Member since 7/05 57538 total posts
Name:
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Re: Parents making comments about your money...
Nope, neither sets of parents have ever made a comment to us about how we spend our money. If they did, I'd tell them to MYOB.
My parents do comment to one sister about how she spends her money. But in some sense they have every right to since she's renting from them - and hasn't paid rent in over a year.
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| Posted 6/6/06 10:24 AM |
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Pumpkin
LIF Adult
Member since 5/05 3353 total posts
Name:
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Re: Parents making comments about your money...
Posted by prncssrachel
My parents have gotten a lot better about this. Once we got married, they stopped having much to say to us about our finances. I think they felt it was their job, and it was, to steer me in the right direction on all accounts, including financial, so they did. Over and over and over again But honestly, it kept me being honest with myself about money, so I didn't care. They wouldn't judge me, persay, but they would definitely help me to question certain purchases or whatever debts I had. But like I said, now, they stay out of our financial lives. They're good. They know their place now
I think this a very good point, as my parents never asked questions, I never felt accountable to anyone so of course who do we lie to best, ourselves and therefore at one point i had trouble with my finances.
so you make an excellent point
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| Posted 6/6/06 10:26 AM |
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CaseyGirl
Mommy to 3 Boys :)
Member since 5/05 19978 total posts
Name:
Jen - counting my blessings...
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Re: Parents making comments about your money...
Posted by MrsRbk
Posted by preshy7
Posted by LSP2005
Both sets of our parents ask us what we paid for everything. I think they know I like to comparison shop before I buy anything so they don't really say you spent to much. But your comment struck me MRS TC, I think that children are expensive and I am not sure how one would "cut back" after having them. I thought that children cost $$$. I don't mean to sound insensitive, if I do I am sorry, but how are you planning on cutting back after you have children?
For us, we figured we would spend some $$$ now on things we wanted but realized that after we have children we won't be able to spend as much on our wants because we will have to take care of our kids. Is that what you meant?
i think she meant that she likes nice things and doesnt mind spending $ on them, but once she has kids, the kids will come first, before the nice or material things..
i believe that is what she meant b/c thats how i took it (edited for spelling)
I think that's what she means too. DH and I like nice things and like to do lots of nice things too (vacations, nice dinners, etc...) BUT we know that after we have kids, their needs and wants will come before ours.
Insensitive? I don't think so. I am fully aware of the expenses that come with having kids. I meant, not going out to eat Friday and Saturday night, buying clothes on a whim, going on vacation, etc.
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| Posted 6/6/06 10:28 AM |
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Eva Luna
Be kind...life's hard!
Member since 8/05 4750 total posts
Name:
God, bless & heal my DH, JenG's DH Rob & DebG
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Re: Parents making comments about your money...
Luckily, both our parents know we do what we want and definitely don't ever say anything about our spending. I do think they are under the impression that we are "rich" which we aren't by any means...but I think it's cause we've done things our way without any help. Before we paid for our wedding on our own and did it "big" we used to go on vacations every year, bought cars really young and bought a house...so we've been able to accomplish a lot more than them and they think it's cause we have a lot of money, which we really don't. It's called SAVING and WORKING!
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| Posted 6/6/06 10:32 AM |
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jozieb0925
Double Trouble!
Member since 5/05 4358 total posts
Name:
Josie
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Re: Parents making comments about your money...
My theory is if I needed an opinion or advice I would have asked!!!
Message edited 6/6/2006 10:41:36 AM.
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| Posted 6/6/06 10:36 AM |
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lucyloo
nope
Member since 1/06 9758 total posts
Name:
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Re: Parents making comments about your money...
My inlaws like to make comments like you should have bought this or that. Like my tree aka twig. They said I should have bought a bigger one. Well, I had the money I would have!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Hate them. GO HOME. Ok.. got a little side tracked... they've been here over 2 weeks now...
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| Posted 6/6/06 10:39 AM |
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lorich
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Member since 6/05 9987 total posts
Name:
Grammie says "Lora Gina"
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Re: Parents making comments about your money...
Absolutely not.
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| Posted 6/6/06 10:57 AM |
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Blu-ize
Plan B is Now Plan A
Member since 7/05 32475 total posts
Name:
Susan
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Re: Parents making comments about your money...
They make comments but never in a derrogatory way.
My parents and I are very close. I know all about their finances, but I an the executrix of their will and I have power of attorney in case they become incapacitated.
They have a vague idea about our finances..they know how much our mortgage is , how much we paid for our dining room set, how much the tree guy costs..because I do go to them for advice. They have lived longer than me and have good things to add.
They do not know how much we have in assets and how much we make.
They are happy for our success and happy that we are able to help them. They would never tell us what to do with our money. If I find a good savings account or know a good stock we talk about it, but never judge.
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| Posted 6/6/06 11:08 AM |
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hazeleyes33
LIF Adult
Member since 5/05 13060 total posts
Name:
Ginger
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Re: Parents making comments about your money...
YES. My mom stresses me out money ALL the time. She is always stressing how you need to save and I know that but it is HARD with 2 kids and a house. She is not trying to be mean but I feel like I am ALWAYS thinking about money. I wish I could be more layed back in my life about money but that is how I was brought up.
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| Posted 6/6/06 12:43 PM |
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saraH
happy birthday sweet kate!
Member since 5/05 16555 total posts
Name:
I know that God exsists, I held her in my arms...
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Re: Parents making comments about your money...
my parents do not talk about money with anyone, aside from one another. they didn't ask us how much per head for the wedding, etc. fil's on the other hand, can't not talk about money. i find it extremely tacky for them to ask us how much is this or that.
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| Posted 6/6/06 12:46 PM |
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juju
Welcome to the World!
Member since 5/05 6747 total posts
Name:
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Re: Parents making comments about your money...
My FIL tends to make it a point in every conversation with my DH about me not having a FT job. Arghh!!
FYI, I am dealing with infertility ( I don't want to work FT because I anticipate surgery) and secondly, we are moving again (back to NE from Texas).....so why bother gettting a full time job!
I overheard DH on the phone with FIL this past weekend......I couldn't take it anymore and I let my FIL have it!
He drives me Crazy!
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| Posted 6/6/06 12:53 PM |
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munchkinbugs
My little loves!
Member since 1/06 8093 total posts
Name:
Lisa
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Re: Parents making comments about your money...
I think in a lot of cases our parents had it a little harder than we do now. My mom still talks about how they used to splurge on Oreo cookies if they had a few extra dollars from their paychecks left. I think our generation just spends more on luxury items than our parents used too.
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| Posted 6/6/06 12:59 PM |
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