Re: Motherless Mother's Days

Posted by antoinette

Posted by oneday

Posted by Beth1210

Posted by stardiva80

I lost my mom 2 months after my wedding, so it's been hard dealing with having the best and worst year of your life.

this I can relate too- my DH asked me to marry him the day my Mom died- b/c he wanted her to know- very sweet- but very sad

My mom had been sick in the hospital since Sept. 2000 when DH asked me to marry him on Halloween. I had hoped (and I think maybe DH did too - and that was why he did it when he did) that when she found we had a wedding to plan, maybe that would be the "push" to get better. But, though she would have some improvements here and there, she would decline again. When I was showing her pics of dresses one day, she said something about how my godmother might have to help me - but I told her, no, SHE would have to get well so she could help. It never happened and she passed away the day before my 28th BD in April 2001. I had told DH if she didn't make it, I couldn't get married, but eventually, I started making plans the next year. It was soo hard to plan without her. And I felt so jipped!! But I was so glad that she knew we were getting married - but I also feel guilty that we waited so long and she couldn't be there.

I feel your pain on this too! My mom passeed away a few months after I got married- I changed my wedding date for her to be there- the wedding was awesome and extremely emotional but she was able to have a great time despite being really sick. After the wedding her health slowly deteriorated she held on for the wedding though.

Re: Motherless Mother's Days

I have not lost my mom but I wanted to say that this post breaks my heart. My heart goes out to you ladies - on Mothers Day and everyday

Re: Motherless Mother's Days

I might be able to make it, where and when? I think it was posted 5-23 @6:30 pm ....

Re: Motherless Mother's Days

Re: Motherless Mother's Days

I know there is a California Pizza Kitchen in the Walt Whitman Mall......there is also a Friday's right over there by the corner of Jericho Tpke and 110.....there are a whole bunch of places on 110...Bertucci's, Cirella's, Rosewood Inn...etc.

Re: Motherless Mother's Days

any place is fine with me

Cirella's look nice- quiter then friday's or CPK I would think?

Re: Motherless Mother's Days

Yeah, I would think Cirella's is more quiet than the others.....that is fine w/me.

Re: Motherless Mother's Days

ok- so tuesday May 23rd at 6:30 at cirella's

anyone else want to come?

Re: Motherless Mother's Days

I do not know that area well, where is this place? is it easy to get to?

Re: Motherless Mother's Days

If I found the right place? it looks pretty easy to get to right on 110 off the LIE or Northern State is even closer. And I am TERRIBLE with directions, but I think I can find this.
Where are you coming from?

Re: Motherless Mother's Days

Count me in!

Re: Motherless Mother's Days

Ladies,

I have no idea why I am only seeing this now.

First of all, Barbara, (nrthshrgrl) those were the kindest, most thoughtful words I have read in a long time Your compassion for our plight really shows through.

I lost my mom at age 8, my brother was 4. It's a bit of a long story but it did happen very suddenly and violently. It was April 5th, 1979 and I remember every single moment of that night. Apparently, my parents were having some problems, were fighting that night and my father thought they should go up and talk with a priest. It was lent and there was a service scheduled that night in the church. We drove up there in my father's yellow Volkswagen Beatle. I was sitting in the back seat right behind my mother and my 4 year old brother was right next to me. My father went into the rectory (we were in the church parking lot) to get the priest, I guess to coak my mom out of the car. As soon as my father got in the doors of the rectory my mother bolted from the car, leaving my brother and I, and started to walk home. It was after 7 and already dark. The next thing I remember seeing, a few minutes later, were ambulances and cop cars speeding, lights and sirens blazing, down South Oyster Bay Rd. heading North past Our Lady of Mercy Church.

Now, if what I am about to tell you isn't the voice of God speaking through a child I have no idea what is. My brother turned to me and asked me what all of the ambulances were for and I turned to him and said, "They are for mommy." How I knew that I have no idea? She was a few blocks away and an 8 foot tall hedge would have prevented us from seeing anything anyway. Next thing I remember is seeing my father with Fr. Brasil run out towards the car asking us where our mother was. Once we said she ran out, my father ran. Fr. Brasil was to conduct the lenten prayer service so we were paired up with a mom of one of my 3rd grade classsmates, Mrs. Bohm. By this time the adults knew what was happening, my father was en route to the hospital, and Father Brasil opened the prayer service with a special dedication to my mother. We were sitting in the 7th row on the right hand side.

Afterwards, Mrs. Bohm toook us for ice-cream and to play some arcade games. A few hours later we returned to the rectory. I remember walking into Father Brasil's dark wood paneled office and seeing my father run towards me, drop to his needs and burst out into hysterical tears saying, "I'm so sorry. Mommy is dead... Mommy is dead.

A criminal trial was held when I was in 6th grade.
A civil trial was heldd in Nassau county family court when I was in 7th grade. My father and his lawyer had to sign us out of school and we appeared in our uniforms in front of a Nassau county judge. We had to if my father was suing on behalf of the two of us as well... the court had to know there was a Theresa H and Michael H. When I made my appearance, the man who hit my mother was temporarily removed from the courtroom so as my brother and myself would not see his face. I walked right up to the judge, stated my name, stated my mother's name and was free to go. No child, no child, EVER, anywhere or anytime EVER have to do such.

I am an incredibly strong woman. My mother has not been physically present for any of my graduations, prom, dates, sending off to college, etc., however her spirit lives through me. I call upon her spirit everyday as DH and I try to find strength battling infertility.

Let's just say, I don't sweat the small stuff. My experiences in life have left me with little tolerance for ignorant, materialists, gossipy, judgemental, dysfunctional people. Every day is a gift!! We never know which one woill be our last.

As I approach the same age (three more years) as when my mother died it hurts more. She was robbed, I was robbed, my brother and father were robbed. I never got a chance to learn who she truly was.

I'm sorry I won't be able to join you for the GTG but I do highly recommend each one of you read the book, "Motherless Daughters"... can't remember the author by came out in 1994, I think.

for all our moms.

Re: Motherless Mother's Days

Posted by Tah-wee-ZAH

Ladies,

I have no idea why I am only seeing this now.

First of all, Barbara, (nrthshrgrl) those were the kindest, most thoughtful words I have read in a long time Your compassion for our plight really shows through.

I lost my mom at age 8, my brother was 4. It's a bit of a long story but it did happen very suddenly and violently. It was April 5th, 1979 and I remember every single moment of that night. Apparently, my parents were having some problems, were fighting that night and my father thought they should go up and talk with a priest. It was lent and there was a service scheduled that night in the church. We drove up there in my father's yellow Volkswagen Beatle. I was sitting in the back seat right behind my mother and my 4 year old brother was right next to me. My father went into the rectory (we were in the church parking lot) to get the priest, I guess to coak my mom out of the car. As soon as my father got in the doors of the rectory my mother bolted from the car, leaving my brother and I, and started to walk home. It was after 7 and already dark. The next thing I remember seeing, a few minutes later, were ambulances and cop cars speeding, lights and sirens blazing, down South Oyster Bay Rd. heading North past Our Lady of Mercy Church.

Now, if what I am about to tell you isn't the voice of God speaking through a child I have no idea what is. My brother turned to me and asked me what all of the ambulances were for and I turned to him and said, "They are for mommy." How I knew that I have no idea? She was a few blocks away and an 8 foot tall hedge would have prevented us from seeing anything anyway. Next thing I remember is seeing my father with Fr. Brasil run out towards the car asking us where our mother was. Once we said she ran out, my father ran. Fr. Brasil was to conduct the lenten prayer service so we were paired up with a mom of one of my 3rd grade classsmates, Mrs. Bohm. By this time the adults knew what was happening, my father was en route to the hospital, and Father Brasil opened the prayer service with a special dedication to my mother. We were sitting in the 7th row on the right hand side.

Afterwards, Mrs. Bohm toook us for ice-cream and to play some arcade games. A few hours later we returned to the rectory. I remember walking into Father Brasil's dark wood paneled office and seeing my father run towards me, drop to his needs and burst out into hysterical tears saying, "I'm so sorry. Mommy is dead... Mommy is dead.

A criminal trial was held when I was in 6th grade.
A civil trial was heldd in Nassau county family court when I was in 7th grade. My father and his lawyer had to sign us out of school and we appeared in our uniforms in front of a Nassau county judge. We had to if my father was suing on behalf of the two of us as well... the court had to know there was a Theresa H and Michael H. When I made my appearance, the man who hit my mother was temporarily removed from the courtroom so as my brother and myself would not see his face. I walked right up to the judge, stated my name, stated my mother's name and was free to go. No child, no child, EVER, anywhere or anytime EVER have to do such.

I am an incredibly strong woman. My mother has not been physically present for any of my graduations, prom, dates, sending off to college, etc., however her spirit lives through me. I call upon her spirit everyday as DH and I try to find strength battling infertility.

Let's just say, I don't sweat the small stuff. My experiences in life have left me with little tolerance for ignorant, materialists, gossipy, judgemental, dysfunctional people. Every day is a gift!! We never know which one woill be our last.

As I approach the same age (three more years) as when my mother died it hurts more. She was robbed, I was robbed, my brother and father were robbed. I never got a chance to learn who she truly was.

I'm sorry I won't be able to join you for the GTG but I do highly recommend each one of you read the book, "Motherless Daughters"... can't remember the author by came out in 1994, I think.

for all our moms.

Re: Motherless Mother's Days

Posted by Tah-wee-ZAH

Ladies,

I have no idea why I am only seeing this now.

First of all, Barbara, (nrthshrgrl) those were the kindest, most thoughtful words I have read in a long time Your compassion for our plight really shows through.

I lost my mom at age 8, my brother was 4. It's a bit of a long story but it did happen very suddenly and violently. It was April 5th, 1979 and I remember every single moment of that night. Apparently, my parents were having some problems, were fighting that night and my father thought they should go up and talk with a priest. It was lent and there was a service scheduled that night in the church. We drove up there in my father's yellow Volkswagen Beatle. I was sitting in the back seat right behind my mother and my 4 year old brother was right next to me. My father went into the rectory (we were in the church parking lot) to get the priest, I guess to coak my mom out of the car. As soon as my father got in the doors of the rectory my mother bolted from the car, leaving my brother and I, and started to walk home. It was after 7 and already dark. The next thing I remember seeing, a few minutes later, were ambulances and cop cars speeding, lights and sirens blazing, down South Oyster Bay Rd. heading North past Our Lady of Mercy Church.

Now, if what I am about to tell you isn't the voice of God speaking through a child I have no idea what is. My brother turned to me and asked me what all of the ambulances were for and I turned to him and said, "They are for mommy." How I knew that I have no idea? She was a few blocks away and an 8 foot tall hedge would have prevented us from seeing anything anyway. Next thing I remember is seeing my father with Fr. Brasil run out towards the car asking us where our mother was. Once we said she ran out, my father ran. Fr. Brasil was to conduct the lenten prayer service so we were paired up with a mom of one of my 3rd grade classsmates, Mrs. Bohm. By this time the adults knew what was happening, my father was en route to the hospital, and Father Brasil opened the prayer service with a special dedication to my mother. We were sitting in the 7th row on the right hand side.

Afterwards, Mrs. Bohm toook us for ice-cream and to play some arcade games. A few hours later we returned to the rectory. I remember walking into Father Brasil's dark wood paneled office and seeing my father run towards me, drop to his needs and burst out into hysterical tears saying, "I'm so sorry. Mommy is dead... Mommy is dead.

A criminal trial was held when I was in 6th grade.
A civil trial was heldd in Nassau county family court when I was in 7th grade. My father and his lawyer had to sign us out of school and we appeared in our uniforms in front of a Nassau county judge. We had to if my father was suing on behalf of the two of us as well... the court had to know there was a Theresa H and Michael H. When I made my appearance, the man who hit my mother was temporarily removed from the courtroom so as my brother and myself would not see his face. I walked right up to the judge, stated my name, stated my mother's name and was free to go. No child, no child, EVER, anywhere or anytime EVER have to do such.

I am an incredibly strong woman. My mother has not been physically present for any of my graduations, prom, dates, sending off to college, etc., however her spirit lives through me. I call upon her spirit everyday as DH and I try to find strength battling infertility.

Let's just say, I don't sweat the small stuff. My experiences in life have left me with little tolerance for ignorant, materialists, gossipy, judgemental, dysfunctional people. Every day is a gift!! We never know which one woill be our last.

As I approach the same age (three more years) as when my mother died it hurts more. She was robbed, I was robbed, my brother and father were robbed. I never got a chance to learn who she truly was.

I'm sorry I won't be able to join you for the GTG but I do highly recommend each one of you read the book, "Motherless Daughters"... can't remember the author by came out in 1994, I think.

for all our moms.

Re: Motherless Mother's Days

Posted by oneday

If I found the right place? it looks pretty easy to get to right on 110 off the LIE or Northern State is even closer. And I am TERRIBLE with directions, but I think I can find this.
Where are you coming from?

Re: Motherless Mother's Days

The Author of Motherless Daughters is Hope Edelman!
She also has another book called Letters ofrom Motherless Daughters wich is also Excellent!
I also highly recommend these books!

Re: Motherless Mother's Days

Theresa, your story touched me very much. I am sooo sorry.

And Luvlylady, I was going to recommend those books as well. I started reading Motherless Daughters and had to stop for some reason; it was too draining for me at the time. I plan to start reading the books soon, though.

Re: Motherless Mother's Days

maybe we should ask Ron/Liz for our own bd that way we can communicate and be a support system for each other all year long? Just an idea... let me know and I will Fm mail Ron/Liz and ask.

Re: Motherless Mother's Days

Re: Motherless Mother's Days

That's an awesome idea. i think a seperate board would be great for us as well as girls who haven't seen this thread!

Re: Motherless Mother's Days

Thanks. My mom passed away 3 years ago. I don't care what anyone says, it does not get any easier. I miss her more and more with each passing day.

Re: Motherless Mother's Days

Re: Motherless Mother's Days

Posted by Kate07

Posted by nrthshgrl
I just wanted to say that I can't imagine how hard Mother's Day would be without my mom. This Mother's Day I will give my mom an extra hug because of you. I cherish my mom & she knows it.

Here's to our Moms , the women they were, the women they are, and the women they've molded us to be

Re: Motherless Mother's Days

Posted by Beth1210

thank you-

it's nice to have someone say that- It means alot to me and all the other girls I' sure

Re: Motherless Mother's Days