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ISpoilHim
I think I got this
Member since 11/10 1523 total posts
Name:
K
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When someone invites you over and says don't bring anything...
Why do people still feel obligated to bring something? I understand hospitality but when I invite people over for a meal I plan every aspect of the meal. If my guests bring something when I told them nothing was necessary I feel obligated to serve it and it may not go with everything else I planned.
So if you are invited for dinner do you bring something with you if the host says not to?
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Posted 3/17/13 11:38 PM  |
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Long Island Weddings
Long Island's Largest Bridal Resource |
LSP2005
Bunny kisses are so cute!
Member since 5/05 19458 total posts
Name:
L
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Re: When someone invites you over and says don't bring anything...
If the host says no, I bring wine as a hostess gift. Whether or not to serve it is up to the host. I would not bring food if I was told not to though. I look at the wine as a gift. They can feel free to enjoy it later or give it to someone else.
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| Posted 3/17/13 11:43 PM |
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drpepper318
MIR MIR MIR!
Member since 6/07 8274 total posts
Name:
me
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Re: When someone invites you over and says don't bring anything...
I'd probably bring a bottle of wine or something else that they can use at a later time.
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| Posted 3/18/13 12:00 AM |
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TyReseGreen
Lil Prince is here
Member since 8/11 6338 total posts
Name:
Theresa
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When someone invites you over and says don't bring anything...
Like the last 2 posters I would bring a bottle of wine or something.
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| Posted 3/18/13 7:47 AM |
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maybebaby
LIF Adult
Member since 11/05 6870 total posts
Name:
Maureen
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Re: When someone invites you over and says don't bring anything...
I don't personally think it matter if it goes with everything you planned...just put it out and no one will really care. Typically I'll bring wine or a dessert if I'm told not to bring anything but I feel it's always appreciated. I think it's nice that people bring something anyway, it's gracious on their part!
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| Posted 3/18/13 7:59 AM |
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nferrandi
too excited for words
Member since 10/05 18538 total posts
Name:
Nicole
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Re: When someone invites you over and says don't bring anything...
Posted by maybebaby
I don't personally think it matter if it goes with everything you planned...just put it out and no one will really care. Typically I'll bring wine or a dessert if I'm told not to bring anything but I feel it's always appreciated. I think it's nice that people bring something anyway, it's gracious on their part!
Same
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| Posted 3/18/13 8:14 AM |
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ThePinkGoose
In Your Hands
Member since 8/08 4706 total posts
Name:
Nunya
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Re: When someone invites you over and says don't bring anything...
Posted by maybebaby
I don't personally think it matter if it goes with everything you planned...just put it out and no one will really care. Typically I'll bring wine or a dessert if I'm told not to bring anything but I feel it's always appreciated. I think it's nice that people bring something anyway, it's gracious on their part!
Exactly this and if you think anyone at your event will notice that "one of these things is not like the other" then you are expecting way too much of them. LOL I think it's a little petty to make such a big deal out of someone being gracious enough to bring something for you but that's just my opinion. You can take it or leave it. Yes, I always bring something and if the hostess had a problem with it, it would probably be the last time I attend something that they are hosting.
Message edited 3/18/2013 8:34:29 AM.
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| Posted 3/18/13 8:33 AM |
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DiamondGirl
You are my I love you
Member since 7/09 18802 total posts
Name:
DiamondMama
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Re: When someone invites you over and says don't bring anything...
Posted by maybebaby
I don't personally think it matter if it goes with everything you planned...just put it out and no one will really care. Typically I'll bring wine or a dessert if I'm told not to bring anything but I feel it's always appreciated. I think it's nice that people bring something anyway, it's gracious on their part!
exactly. I try to bring something that the host can use at another time since they made it clear they were all set for today, usually I bring wine, that is never frowned upon in my circle 
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| Posted 3/18/13 8:41 AM |
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MrsM429
Mama x2 <3
Member since 12/10 4946 total posts
Name:
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Re: When someone invites you over and says don't bring anything...
Posted by maybebaby
I don't personally think it matter if it goes with everything you planned...just put it out and no one will really care. Typically I'll bring wine or a dessert if I'm told not to bring anything but I feel it's always appreciated. I think it's nice that people bring something anyway, it's gracious on their part!
Exactly this. I feel funny attending a dinner party empty handed, so Ill usually always bring over a small dessert and bottle of wine. It's a nice gesture and my friends and family always appreciate it.
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| Posted 3/18/13 8:45 AM |
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BeachGrl
LIF Adult
Member since 10/11 2140 total posts
Name:
Kristy
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When someone invites you over and says don't bring anything...
I never go empty handed even if they said not to bring something
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| Posted 3/18/13 8:46 AM |
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ANR1211
My loves
Member since 2/11 2131 total posts
Name:
A
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When someone invites you over and says don't bring anything...
I would bring a bottle of wine or a dessert. I feel rude showing up anywhere without bringing something.
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| Posted 3/18/13 8:49 AM |
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PearlJamChick
No one sings like you anymore.
Member since 7/10 9264 total posts
Name:
Petticoated Swashbuckler
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Re: When someone invites you over and says don't bring anything...
Posted by DiamondGirl
Posted by maybebaby
I don't personally think it matter if it goes with everything you planned...just put it out and no one will really care. Typically I'll bring wine or a dessert if I'm told not to bring anything but I feel it's always appreciated. I think it's nice that people bring something anyway, it's gracious on their part!
exactly. I try to bring something that the host can use at another time since they made it clear they were all set for today, usually I bring wine, that is never frowned upon in my circle
Yep, same here...wine is always appreciated...or a box of really great chocolates.
Now I want wine and chocolates at 8:52am..
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| Posted 3/18/13 8:52 AM |
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MandJZ
Time for Baby #2!
Member since 8/10 4194 total posts
Name:
M
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Re: When someone invites you over and says don't bring anything...
I was taught to never show up at a party or dinner at someone else's house empty handed. Whether it's a bottle of wine they can save, a box of chocolates, or even just flowers for the hostess. If they were extremely insistent on not bringing anything I would probably do flowers. I think it's more rude not to, personally.
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| Posted 3/18/13 8:55 AM |
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MRsFaTThead
NY GIRL IN TEXAS
Member since 6/10 5483 total posts
Name:
WHO GIVES A POO WHO GIVES A FUDGE !!
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Re: When someone invites you over and says don't bring anything...
I still bring something. They don't need to serve it. They can save it for another time.
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| Posted 3/18/13 9:00 AM |
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J9-13
We're gonna be big sisters!
Member since 6/06 14887 total posts
Name:
J9
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Re: When someone invites you over and says don't bring anything...
Posted by LSP2005
If the host says no, I bring wine as a hostess gift. Whether or not to serve it is up to the host. I would not bring food if I was told not to though. I look at the wine as a gift. They can feel free to enjoy it later or give it to someone else.
Ditto. I'll offer to make something or if they need me to pick up dessert. I always bring something to drink though. Whether wine or beer or both.
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| Posted 3/18/13 9:04 AM |
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luvbuffet
LIF Adult
Member since 7/10 6470 total posts
Name:
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Re: When someone invites you over and says don't bring anything...
i never ask if i should bring anything and i hate it when people ask me if they should bring something. i cant go to anyones house empty handed. even if its not food, ill bring over a gift whether its something for the house or perfume or something personal . some people may disagree, but i think asking if they should bring something is tacky
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| Posted 3/18/13 9:09 AM |
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maybebaby
LIF Adult
Member since 11/05 6870 total posts
Name:
Maureen
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Re: When someone invites you over and says don't bring anything...
Posted by luvbuffet
i never ask if i should bring anything and i hate it when people ask me if they should bring something. i cant go to anyones house empty handed. even if its not food, ill bring over a gift whether its something for the house or perfume or something personal . some people may disagree, but i think asking if they should bring something is tacky
I don't think asking is tacky at all! See, in my circle of friends, its honestly really common to say "what should i bring?". Because a lot of the time someone will say "oh an appetizer would be great! Or dessert is always welcome". But thats just the way we do it...or sometimes I will just say "i want to bring something, anything you could use aside from wine/beer?" (because its a given that I'm bringing some form of alcohol.
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| Posted 3/18/13 9:31 AM |
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jes81276
summer fun!
Member since 3/06 4962 total posts
Name:
Jaime
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Re: When someone invites you over and says don't bring anything...
I would bring wine or dessert. I wouldn't mind if the wine wasn't served, but I'd be a little upset if the dessert wasn't. I would never go to someone's house empty handed, and I don't think it's a big deal to put a dessert out, even if it didn't "go" with what was being served. It's the thought that counts.
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| Posted 3/18/13 9:35 AM |
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J9-13
We're gonna be big sisters!
Member since 6/06 14887 total posts
Name:
J9
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Re: When someone invites you over and says don't bring anything...
Posted by maybebaby
Posted by luvbuffet
i never ask if i should bring anything and i hate it when people ask me if they should bring something. i cant go to anyones house empty handed. even if its not food, ill bring over a gift whether its something for the house or perfume or something personal . some people may disagree, but i think asking if they should bring something is tacky
I don't think asking is tacky at all! See, in my circle of friends, its honestly really common to say "what should i bring?". Because a lot of the time someone will say "oh an appetizer would be great! Or dessert is always welcome". But thats just the way we do it...or sometimes I will just say "i want to bring something, anything you could use aside from wine/beer?" (because its a given that I'm bringing some form of alcohol.
Yup! I agree. I have friends over so often and always serve apps, food and drinks so if someone wants to bring chips and dip, that's awesome! For me, I appreciate the thought and really don't care what anyone brings. I personally don't like to go anywhere empty handed though.
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| Posted 3/18/13 9:58 AM |
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ElizaRags35
My 2 Girls
Member since 2/09 20494 total posts
Name:
Me
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Re: When someone invites you over and says don't bring anything...
Posted by maybebaby
I don't personally think it matter if it goes with everything you planned...just put it out and no one will really care. Typically I'll bring wine or a dessert if I'm told not to bring anything but I feel it's always appreciated. I think it's nice that people bring something anyway, it's gracious on their part!
ITA.
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| Posted 3/18/13 10:12 AM |
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PaddysGirl
Little princess is here!
Member since 4/07 5923 total posts
Name:
Crystal
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When someone invites you over and says don't bring anything...
I was taught never to go empty handed. With that said I know my friends & vice versa. We always discuss what is being made and ask what can we bring. If I am not told anyhting specific I will bring a dessert and or booze.
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| Posted 3/18/13 10:25 AM |
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PumpkinGirl
:o)
Member since 10/08 1838 total posts
Name:
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Re: When someone invites you over and says don't bring anything...
I don't like to go empty handed. I will usually tell them what I'm bringing ahead of time (ie: cookies, brownies, an app, etc) so they can plan for it.
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| Posted 3/18/13 10:55 AM |
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JennP
LIF Adult
Member since 10/06 3986 total posts
Name:
Jenn
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Re: When someone invites you over and says don't bring anything...
When I have someone over and they ask what they can bring, I always make a suggestion because I know a)they don't want to come over empty handed and b) because of (a), if I suggest nothing, they'll bring something that could be random.
Honestly I think if you tell people not to bring something you are taking that risk.
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| Posted 3/18/13 10:57 AM |
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AllyMally
LIF Adolescent
Member since 1/13 881 total posts
Name:
Alyson
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When someone invites you over and says don't bring anything...
I can't go somewhere empty handed. I was raised it was rude to do so. I normally bring flowers or something seasonal. Depending on the event or the friends we may take a particular beer or wine we know they love, but the expectation is it's for them later. I would never expect to bring something food or drink related to a dinner and have it served. If I do make something it's because I know THEY like it and it's a treat for them. Like my Aunt and her 7 kids LOVE my Corn Salsa so I will make it for them as a treat, but I would never expect them to serve it!
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| Posted 3/18/13 11:22 AM |
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kahlua716
3 Girls for Me!
Member since 8/07 12475 total posts
Name:
Keri
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Re: When someone invites you over and says don't bring anything...
I usually bring wine or flowers for the hostess. They have no obligation to serve the wine while I'm there.
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| Posted 3/18/13 11:36 AM |
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