working moms-how do you handle schedule conflicts with child care..

Ugh, so the stress begins..i have two meetings , one this week and next that go until 6pm a good hour away from home..i have a nanny from 9-5 and she works a few nights after leaving me..so, i am not going to have too much flexability..basically, two days i am going to be gone 7-7...my DH is away for 10 days starting this week, ugh.so no help there...i am just back to work, what do i do! I have no family nearby and my MIL is not reliable for that...i am stressing..do i just explain i have a new baby and cant go past a certain time..are employers understanding to this?!

Re: working moms-how do you handle schedule conflicts with child care..

Ugh I really think you should leave the meeting early, given the situation with DH away, unless you have a reliable friend or neighbor to step in until you get home?
I'm not working now but when I was (in a VERY male-dominated corporation/industry) they were on a real "work/life" balance kick so they would have been fine with that (or at least they would have SAID they were fine with it )

Re: working moms-how do you handle schedule conflicts with child care..

I have similar stuff come up at work. While I do have people who can watch him, personally, I gave up my former role because of this kind of stuff and I am putting my foot down and not doing it anymore. I work during business hours which are 9-5 or 8-4. I am no longer going to get home at 8:00 at night because of "meetings". I really don't care about my job that much.

Frankly, the only reason this stuff even comes up from time to time is because of other people who work F/T elsewhere during the day and don't want to take off or send their supervisor to the meeting during regular business hours.

I've done it a couple times already since going back after maternity leave last month and swore I would never do it again because frankly, my presence at the meeting really did not make much of a difference, or it wasn't anything I couldn't just review the minutes on.

Re: working moms-how do you handle schedule conflicts with child care..

I think that you may have to leave the meeting early unless when u hired your nanny did u explain you would need her to work late occasionally as needed? if not you may need to find a nanny who has a more flexible schedule or talk to your company and explain that u cant stay late.

We just had an employee go through this and unfortunately her boss wasnt flexible and she had to quit since it was a requirement for her role and she was aware it was needed when she took on the job but wasnt an issue before she had kids.
My advice is talk to your boss and discuss this before they approach you. they may be ok with you missing the meeting and briefing you or even have you on the phone instead of physically there.

Re: working moms-how do you handle schedule conflicts with child care..

Do you have a close friend who could come and hang out with your DC for an hour or two? If you have no other choice, I would just let my boss know the situation and see if I could leave early.

My DH is self employed and can sometimes set his own schedule. My ILs live near us so they usually can help us out in a bind.

Re: working moms-how do you handle schedule conflicts with child care..

My husband and I try to work out care between ourselves before asking other people. We still have to resort to asking other people a lot but we have found that looking to each other first is most reliable. In addition, I don't cater as much to when other people need me. I am available for meetings at so many hours that I can no longer feel bad if I can't cater to the small window of time that I can't easily get child care.

Re: working moms-how do you handle schedule conflicts with child care..

IMO, I would sit down with who ever is in charge of the meeting and explain the situation. Maybe you can be part of the mtg via conference call and you can mute your phone except when you need to participate. Honestly, I'm finding that due to the economy employers want you to bend over backwards b/c they think they have you by the you know whats and yet they owe us nothing when they are only making a few mil and want their billions. Guess they are right b/c of the way things are - what choice do we have, but I know someone who walked out of a training class and quit b/c she got a migrane b/c the trainers gave her a hard time about it. I will probably be faced with your exact situation some day. I'm waiting for me to be required to be away for some BS meeting at the same time DH is. So I sympathize. They should be more understanding, hopefully we'll get back to more jobs than candidates sometime soon and be treated humanely again.

Re: working moms-how do you handle schedule conflicts with child care..

Ugh...it absolutely sucks to be in that position.

The way I handle it is I have back-ups. I have family near by that pitch in & a friend that helps with the conveniently scheduled "playdates".

Other people I know have their kids in daycares. One couple I know paid a daycare teacher to take their child home every day until they got home from work.

If I were in your situation, I'd enlist a friend's help. It sounds like you only need a few hours of coverage. In the meantime, try to find the reliable teenager in your neighborhood.

As for employers understanding it, they do understand it but have to run their business anyway. If it were me, I'd find someone & not skip the meeting.

Message edited 3/14/2009 1:54:57 PM.

Re: working moms-how do you handle schedule conflicts with child care..

Yeah, my boss was not understanding...she said, sorry it is mandatory, meanwhile, i am the top rep in the company helping everyone make big bucks, did awesome while pregnant and throwing up everyday and I have never asked for anything..what makes me even more mad is right before my leave, my DM says to me, well, everyone is pitching in to help you on maternity leave, dont expect to get the holidays off next year, you are going to have to help everyone out..i am just so sick of it all. I dont feel like it is worth the hassle..i swear, i could prob get a job somewhere else, the prob is i work in the medical industry and I have to go through a ton of training if i switch jobs...blah..i just want to quit and be a SAHM...

Re: working moms-how do you handle schedule conflicts with child care..

Ugh Kelley that is so ridiculous Honestly I cannot BELIEVE anyone said that to you about the holidays, that gives me the creeps and I don't know if I'd be able to give them 100% after something like that.
Where do you live, maybe someone here can watch the baby until you get home those 2 nights?
And I'd be putting my resume together at this point that's for damn sure...