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bpmom
Feeling Blessed
Member since 6/07 2963 total posts
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Would you sign a health care proxy-type doc for your ILs for a WEEKEND?
I thought I was a worrier, but my ILs are showing me up on this one....
DH and I have a wedding in south jersey this weekend, so the boys are spending the night with the ILs at our house.
It's only one night and while I know we'll be one state away -- my FIL just e-mailed me a copy of the document they want us to sign (and get notarized) tonight that gives them the authority to make decisions on our behalf for our children while we are away. DH thinks it's overkill and isn't sure if we should sign it; I'm OK signing it because I'm 99% sure NOTHING will go wrong while we're away but if this makes MIL feel better, it's fine with me.
WWYD? Are they overly concerned or is this something we don't even need to worry about? Anybody have their ILs ever take their kids to the hospital?
Message edited 5/12/2011 4:21:14 PM.
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Posted 5/12/11 4:20 PM  |
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Mkr09
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Member since 5/05 7550 total posts
Name:
M
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Re: Would you sign a health care proxy-type doc for your ILs for a WEEKEND?
My ILs watch DDs during the week while DH and I work, so they have a healthcare form that we drafted and got notarized.
But my mom took DD#1 away for the weekend last year and we had one made up for her as well.
I would rather be safe than sorry g-d forbid something happened. What if something life threatening happened while you were away at the wedding and they gave your ILs a hard time about making a decision. We also gave them copies of the girls health ins cards as well.
We work in an attorney's office though so it was really easy to draft a letter and get it notarized.
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| Posted 5/12/11 4:23 PM |
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itsbabytime
LIF Adult
Member since 11/05 9644 total posts
Name:
Me
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Re: Would you sign a health care proxy-type doc for your ILs for a WEEKEND?
Maybe I just don't know too much about this but, no, I would absolutely never sign this.. If something were to god forbid happened, once they took the kids to the hospital, I would want to be called and I would want to make all the decisions. I would not give anyone else the right to make life or death decisions for my children. And, to be honest, I would be beyond disturbed if my IL's sent this to me. WHY would they need this document? You will be at a wedding, reachable and within driving distance - not Iraq - it just does not make sense to me why you cannot still be the one to make decisions for your child 
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| Posted 5/12/11 4:24 PM |
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Re: Would you sign a health care proxy-type doc for your ILs for a WEEKEND?
Posted by itsbabytime
Maybe I just don't know too much about this but, no, I would absolutely never sign this.. If something were to god forbid happened, once they took the kids to the hospital, I would want to be called and I would want to make all the decisions. I would not give anyone else the right to make life or death decisions for my children. And, to be honest, I would be beyond disturbed if my IL's sent this to me. WHY would they need this document? You will be at a wedding, reachable and within driving distance - not Iraq - it just does not make sense to me why you cannot still be the one to make decisions for your child
this is why I'm always confused on this topic. Can someone elaborate? I only did it for when we left the country.
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| Posted 5/12/11 4:26 PM |
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BargainMama
LIF Adult
Member since 5/09 15657 total posts
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Re: Would you sign a health care proxy-type doc for your ILs for a WEEKEND?
Posted by itsbabytime
Maybe I just don't know too much about this but, no, I would absolutely never sign this.. If something were to god forbid happened, once they took the kids to the hospital, I would want to be called and I would want to make all the decisions. I would not give anyone else the right to make life or death decisions for my children. And, to be honest, I would be beyond disturbed if my IL's sent this to me. WHY would they need this document? You will be at a wedding, reachable and within driving distance - not Iraq - it just does not make sense to me why you cannot still be the one to make decisions for your child
I agree
Aren't those documents usually used for life support, etc.? If your child breaks their arm etc. I don't think there would be an issue with your IL's taking them to the ER to get it fixed. That's not really a "decision making event" because stuff like that is usually all treated the same medically.
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| Posted 5/12/11 4:29 PM |
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DRMom
Two in Blue
Member since 5/05 20223 total posts
Name:
Melissa
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Re: Would you sign a health care proxy-type doc for your ILs for a WEEKEND?
I believe you can just write something saying, please treat my child in teh case of an emergency and immediately notify me to make any and all decisions
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| Posted 5/12/11 4:45 PM |
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Pray4Baby2010
<3 Cutest Giants Fan
Member since 10/09 5796 total posts
Name:
MB
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Re: Would you sign a health care proxy-type doc for your ILs for a WEEKEND?
Posted by DRMom
I believe you can just write something saying, please treat my child in teh case of an emergency and immediately notify me to make any and all decisions
This is what I do when my mom takes my ds- although I trust her completely, I want to be included if its something major.
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| Posted 5/12/11 4:46 PM |
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nrthshgrl
It goes fast. Pay attention.
Member since 7/05 57538 total posts
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Re: Would you sign a health care proxy-type doc for your ILs for a WEEKEND?
I would & did. It included all of our medical insurance info too.
We were out of the country. For me it was along the lines of they can't reach you.
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| Posted 5/12/11 4:47 PM |
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bpmom
Feeling Blessed
Member since 6/07 2963 total posts
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Re: Would you sign a health care proxy-type doc for your ILs for a WEEKEND?
Posted by DRMom
I believe you can just write something saying, please treat my child in teh case of an emergency and immediately notify me to make any and all decisions
When MIL first approached me about it, this is what I was planning on doing. I actually had already written it out, and was going to leave the boys' health ins cards with my ILs. I'm four hours away at most and If needed, I'd charter a freaking airplane to get to my DCs if they needed me.
I don't think I signed something that serious even when my children were in daycare full-time?
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| Posted 5/12/11 4:50 PM |
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Mkr09
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Member since 5/05 7550 total posts
Name:
M
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Re: Would you sign a health care proxy-type doc for your ILs for a WEEKEND?
Posted by DRMom
I believe you can just write something saying, please treat my child in teh case of an emergency and immediately notify me to make any and all decisions
This is what we have. Just a letter stating they can seek medical attention with our numbers so we can be contacted.
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| Posted 5/12/11 5:03 PM |
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Re: Would you sign a health care proxy-type doc for your ILs for a WEEKEND?
I would never sign that and it would make me uncomfortable enough to cnx my trip and stay home. I get being prepared for the worst, but this is way over kill IMHO.
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| Posted 5/12/11 5:28 PM |
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Shorty
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Member since 5/05 30390 total posts
Name:
really
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Re: Would you sign a health care proxy-type doc for your ILs for a WEEKEND?
Posted by DRMom
I believe you can just write something saying, please treat my child in teh case of an emergency and immediately notify me to make any and all decisions
yes, absolutely. My parents always did this when they went away... either for my grandparents, or for me when I was old enough to keep watch over my siblings.
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| Posted 5/12/11 5:30 PM |
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mnmsoinlove
Mommy to 2 sweet girls!
Member since 3/09 8585 total posts
Name:
Melissa
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Re: Would you sign a health care proxy-type doc for your ILs for a WEEKEND?
Yes my parents have one that allows them to make decisions if they are unable to contact dh or I. It also contains a copy of our insurance cards. I also gave my parents a copy of dd vaccines.
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| Posted 5/12/11 5:36 PM |
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mnmsoinlove
Mommy to 2 sweet girls!
Member since 3/09 8585 total posts
Name:
Melissa
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Re: Would you sign a health care proxy-type doc for your ILs for a WEEKEND?
Sorry double post
Message edited 5/12/2011 5:37:24 PM.
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| Posted 5/12/11 5:36 PM |
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CkGm
They get so big, so fast :(
Member since 5/05 13848 total posts
Name:
Christine
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Re: Would you sign a health care proxy-type doc for your ILs for a WEEKEND?
Our form in the kid's files at our doctor's office. They had us do one before their first appointment. Basically it lists my brother, sister and mother as people who can make health care decisions in case I am not there. This way if they are watching my kids, even for the afternoon and had to rush them to the hospital or something, the doctor can see them right away.
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| Posted 5/12/11 5:37 PM |
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MRSE
LIF Adult
Member since 5/05 1420 total posts
Name:
(112903)
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Re: Would you sign a health care proxy-type doc for your ILs for a WEEKEND?
Not really sure, but i do think there needs to be soemthing in wrting from you statin that the person watching them can take them to Doctor otherwise it is some sort of hipa violation
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| Posted 5/12/11 5:58 PM |
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stickydust
Now a mommy of 2!!!
Member since 4/06 3164 total posts
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Re: Would you sign a health care proxy-type doc for your ILs for a WEEKEND?
I would and I have. I am an attorney and drafted one for my in-laws. For me it was an added layer of protection. I have a great relationship with my ILs and know that if, god forbid, something were to happen they would call me. It is not like they would usurp that right from me and DH but rather, in the event that we could not be reached or could not come back quick enough - then someone we TRUST can make that decision.
Also, not all issues are life and death. Ovbiously, in an emergency the hospital will be required to treat DC but what if it is a situation where they need to go to an after-hours urgent care type place? Only parents or legal guardians can authorize medical care and authorize the insurance to pay.
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| Posted 5/12/11 6:03 PM |
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cds58019
The loves of my life :)
Member since 6/08 4276 total posts
Name:
Candice
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Re: Would you sign a health care proxy-type doc for your ILs for a WEEKEND?
Honestly, for an overnight stay and you're only the next state over I would say no. If something did happen the ER staff would obviously do all they could to treat your child's injuries. They have to. If any decisions like god forbid life support, needed to be made, you would be able to get home for those kind of decisions. I think it's a little ridiculous for the amount of time and the distance you will be gone.
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| Posted 5/12/11 6:53 PM |
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Michelle1123
Baby #5 on the way!
Member since 9/05 7919 total posts
Name:
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Re: Would you sign a health care proxy-type doc for your ILs for a WEEKEND?
no. not for weekend away in the state over. Just bc you're not physically there does not mean they cant reach you.
I would consider having a letter notarized saying in an extreme emergency, if I cannot be contacted, then they can make any necessary decisions.
ETA: For non-emergencies, my dr's office already has a letter on file that my in-laws are allowed to bring kids and decide on treatments. We gave that to them when my m-i-l used to watch DC's
Message edited 5/12/2011 7:01:16 PM.
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| Posted 5/12/11 6:59 PM |
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codybear
Our Family is Complete!
Member since 11/06 2064 total posts
Name:
Christine
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Re: Would you sign a health care proxy-type doc for your ILs for a WEEKEND?
I wouldn't sign something like that based on where your going, how long you'll be gone. If anything happens that is an emergency, requiring treatment immediately, the hospital has to do what is necessary to stabilize, anything else, IMO you can be reached quickly enough.
Do you have a will? Because I'd bet that is what they are going to say - what if something happens to you.
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| Posted 5/12/11 7:26 PM |
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Kissy331
My two miracles!
Member since 5/06 17826 total posts
Name:
Kristen
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Re: Would you sign a health care proxy-type doc for your ILs for a WEEKEND?
When DH & I went away in October, I made it a point to put something on file with my Ped's office stating "I authorize Mr & Mrs W to make any decisions needed on behalf of Jason & Nicholas while I, Kristen P is out of town."
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| Posted 5/12/11 7:53 PM |
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Lillykat
going along for the ride...
Member since 5/05 16253 total posts
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Re: Would you sign a health care proxy-type doc for your ILs for a WEEKEND?
I gave my parents a sheet when DD stayed overnight and again when I had DD#2 because honestly you never know what could happen - not as much for major medical decisions but what if they fall and break something I would want them to be able to take them to the ER or other medical place and be able to get them whatever treatment that they need.
Etd to add - that what we gave wouldn't be for life and death - it was if something happened that they can take them and get them treatment. Honestly my parents wouldn't be making major medical decisions or for that matter minor ones whether we are in or out of the country without having me on the phone asking me what I want so that was not an issue. It is basically just in case something happens if you are in another state it could take time to get to your child - would you want them sitting with a broken arm waiting for an xray for you to drive back home?
Message edited 5/12/2011 8:00:20 PM.
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| Posted 5/12/11 7:57 PM |
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christy811
LIF Adolescent
Member since 9/08 846 total posts
Name:
C
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Re: Would you sign a health care proxy-type doc for your ILs for a WEEKEND?
Posted by CkGm
Our form in the kid's files at our doctor's office. They had us do one before their first appointment. Basically it lists my brother, sister and mother as people who can make health care decisions in case I am not there. This way if they are watching my kids, even for the afternoon and had to rush them to the hospital or something, the doctor can see them right away.
This is exactly what our Ped had us do.
Honestly I don't really see the big deal. My Ped has a letter on file saying my mother has permission and when I need my in-laws to watch DS I give them a similiar letter. IMO I'd appreciate my in-laws if they were so caring and on top of things like that. It's not like they are going to make decisions without calling you but like PP have said its more of a formality with hospitals and after-hour care facilities than anything else. Just sign it and both take a copy. Better safe than sorry IMO.
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| Posted 5/12/11 8:25 PM |
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Re: Would you sign a health care proxy-type doc for your ILs for a WEEKEND?
we have only done this when we were out of the country. if split second decisions need to be made and we can't be reached by phone we wanted my parents to be able to have a say...
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| Posted 5/12/11 9:41 PM |
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AnnBrunoXO
2 Girls For Me!
Member since 5/05 4377 total posts
Name:
MaMMa
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Re: Would you sign a health care proxy-type doc for your ILs for a WEEKEND?
I don't know if I would sign something like this. We are always reachable as parents and we trust the judgment of our inlaws/parents fully in case of an emergency if we aren't there. In the case of being away only for one night - i wouldn't see a need for it.....
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| Posted 5/12/11 9:51 PM |
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