Would you switch obs? sorry long, need some thoughts

I have two children and would like to have a third someday. I have also lost three pregnancies and had 3 d&cs . One d&c was yesterday...

My ob promised me on Friday that although I was on standby for surgery it would be one on MOn. Monday at 9:30 am I still had not time for surgery, but was still promised that it would get done. At 10:30 I called my obs office to find out that the doctor was rescheduling the surgery for TUes. NOw mind you I had not eaten since the night before and my dh had stayed home from work so I could have this surgery and when were they going to tell me if I had not called. NOt to mention the fact that I still had severe morning sickness and was dying to just have a cracker.

I insisted that they still do the surgery since my dh could not take off again on Tues. So they very nicely arranged for me to have surgery at 3 pm with another doctor. Then at 3pm in the hospital I find out that he will be an hour late. My surgery ended up bsing after 4 with another doctor.

I was really upset, being that this is not such a pleasant surgery and then my own ob can't make it. I know he had to see patients in the office.

My friends and family are telling me I need a new ob. What do you think? I sort of liked his partner who did the d&c for me. Would you switch to him or find a new ob altogether or stay?

Re: Would you switch obs? sorry long, need some thoughts

First, I'm soooo sorry for your loss. I think maybe you should discuss it with the Dr. , ask him what happened? Thats is a very sensitive surgery and not something you want to be waiting around for! Why even consider schedulign it if he had office patients to see?

I woudl make a decision after he responds. Giev him a chance, since the emotional aspect of the whole thing might play a part on a rash decision kwim?

Then if your answer is not satisfactory, you can switch with no doubts

Re: Would you switch obs? sorry long, need some thoughts

i too am soo sorry for your loss. I agree with the previous poster. If this is a doctor that you've really liked up until this point, I would definitely speak to him and tell him how you feel, and how surprised you were to be treated in such an impersonal and unfair way by his office. It could be that the dr. knew nothing about what was going on - it could have been his staff playing with his schedule.

That happened to me once (completely different circumstances), and the dr. that I loved was very upset that his staff had given me the run around.

If the doctor's answer isn't satisfactory, I would definitely look for a new one.

Re: Would you switch obs? sorry long, need some thoughts

i'm so sorry for your loss...i think it all depends on how comfortable you are with your doc and if one bad day is something you can overlook...if not then i would think about switching if not to his partner but maybe another practice all together. You have to do what feels right to you.

Re: Would you switch obs? sorry long, need some thoughts

I'm so sorry for your loss.

Honestly, though- i'm not sure it's the doctor's fault. It may have been the hospital.

When I had to have a D & C done, I had to wait until 10:00 at night to have the surgery. I was on Morphine all day, had not eaten or drank anything and had to spend the day next to a crying infant. It wasn't fun. My OB put in complaints at the hospital because I was waiting for 14 hours.

Re: Would you switch obs? sorry long, need some thoughts

Thank you for your responses.

I have no attachment to this doctor other than that I had a great recovery from my last c-section. I only switched to him when I was about 32 weeks preggo with my dd.

I am not that comfortable speaking to him about not showing for my d&c. How would you approach that one?
I was not as upset with him as my family was, to be honest. But by 3:30 I had had enough. I really just wanted to go home.

Would it be terrible to just switch to his partner? Do you think he will be annoyed? Or maybe he won't notice. I don't really want to switch practices and I just might stay with him.

Thanks

Re: Would you switch obs? sorry long, need some thoughts

i dont know if it was late on Friday that played a factor in it...

but ive have 2 mc- the 2nd one was a d&c. I went into the office in the afternoon and they had me rush over to winthrop for pre-op testing and did it the next morning.... I know what its like to have to fast including no water from the night before and i think having to wait til the late afternoon is unexceptable...

the only concern id have about switching to his partner is there are chances he might have to go to the hospital and you might get the original doctor for an appt... and he'd be the backup for the partner so he might deliver your baby... our first loss we ended up hating the doctor- and while our second doctor wasnt in her practice-she was one of his backup's- my dh and i were cringing at the thought of having to see her again.

Re: Would you switch obs? sorry long, need some thoughts

Firstly I am so sorry for your loss. A d&c is such a horrible thing to go through and is only made worse the longer you have to wait, especially if you have already got a date/time in your mind that you're expecting.

I had a d&c in January and was admitted to the hospital at 7am and didn't have the procedure until 4pm so I can sympathize on how awful that wait is (made much worse by your sickness I can imagine). I live in Ireland so the process/practice here is very different but I learned through my d&c that I was NOT comfortable with the hospital I chose to have my pg/birth at so I decided that in the future I will switch to another hospital.

It seems to me that you are not comfortable or confident with your OB and my advice would be to go to someone else. IMO the most important thing is for you to have support, trust and confidence in your OB. The pp made a very good point about if you switched to his partner and he for whatever reason was unavailable, you may end up seeing your old doctor, which might be awkward but also you might not be happy with seeing him period.

If it were me I'd move to another OB office. I'm sure the ladies on here could advise you someone who they have confidence in - the most important thing is that you're comfortable!

I'm so sorry that you had to go through this during this already difficult time.

Re: Would you switch obs? sorry long, need some thoughts

Thanks again. I think I will look into other obs. I hate to have to switch again , but...

Re: Would you switch obs? sorry long, need some thoughts

I'm not sure how long you've been there, but I am disgusted by his disregard for you as a person. I am not shocked though that he placed the billing and office visits before you as this seems to be a growing trend with overbooked medical practices. I'm sorry for all that you have been through and then to have an insensitive, irresponsible physician abandon you at your most vulnerable time...it's just not right. I'd absolutely leave the practice. It may have been one day 'off'...but this is surgery, this is a loss, it's not something to blow off or forget about...not ever. IMO he doesn't deserve your copays, your insurance reimbursement, or your trust. Good Luck and

Re: Would you switch obs? sorry long, need some thoughts

If you like his partner switch to him/her he will never know the difference. I saw both Drs the entire pregnancy with DD#2 just because I like them both and they are so different, it was noice to see what each had to say. And at the end my Drs partner delivered BOTH my DDs it was never "my" OB. Im so srry for you loss I have been there right before I got preggo with DD #2. She is 2 1/2 weeks old now. Hang in there, I hope you will be back soon..

Re: Would you switch obs? sorry long, need some thoughts

Im very sorry for your loss. Its hard enough to deal with...you need a new dr.

they should really be more compassionate since they deal with pregnant women every day. this was no way to handle your surgery. i'd move on to someone better.