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LIPrincess
Foxy Lady
Member since 6/05 1610 total posts
Name:
Jaimie
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WWYD? I need opinions about a friend. (sorry its a little long).
My bff and I have been friends for over 30 yrs, thats what makes my decision so much more difficult.
I dont wont to make this really long, so here is the gist. She stayed at my house while we were in FL and took care of the house and dogs, which I will always be grateful but then yesterday morning we were talking about me hiring a landscaper and her response (my dh is redoing my whole house, studs, sheetroock, ceilings, floors, everything), is why bother dont you like living like white trash, isnt that how your husband is comfortable? ***? So, unfortunately, I let it go, this morning I was telling her that his ex-wife (thats another story) and daughter might be moving back at the end of this school yr from Fl and my dh might be seeking custody her response was, Why, (insert my dh name here), is such a horrible father, he should have never let them go. She then proceeded to tell me that his daughter was better off in foster care until both parents took a parenting class. I was so shocked I didnt say anything.
I really cant keep doing this, how dare she judge my house, my dh (who is loved by my family and friends) and my life. I would love to stop talking to her, but we already booked and paid for a cruise in January so I am kind of stuck. I really dont even want to talk to her anymore.
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Posted 10/1/07 11:22 AM  |
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Long Island Weddings
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littlejoy06
Love
Member since 3/07 6944 total posts
Name:
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Re: WWYD? I need opinions about a friend. (sorry its a little long).
 I can't believe she said that. I would have said, "excuse me?" That was totally rude of her.
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| Posted 10/1/07 11:27 AM |
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Marcie
Complete Happiness :)
Member since 5/05 27789 total posts
Name:
LOVE being a Mommy!
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Re: WWYD? I need opinions about a friend. (sorry its a little long).
I think you need to sit her down and ask her why she thinks she can talk about you and your family that way 
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| Posted 10/1/07 11:28 AM |
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BabyAvocado
Happy New Year
Member since 5/05 17334 total posts
Name:
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Re: WWYD? I need opinions about a friend. (sorry its a little long).
I don't know how you didn't flip on her.
Was the house comment a joke referencing the fact that the house was mid construction?
This is how she talks about your husband and she is your friend?
Unless you have it out with her and let her know that these comments are unnacceptable and she agrees to stop, I don't see how you could continue calling her a friend. It's one thing if she disagrees with certain things going on in your life or dislikes your DH, but she has to be a LOT more tactful in how she voices that opinion to you. Cruise or not, I'd cut her out if she can't stop putting you and your DH down like that. 
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| Posted 10/1/07 11:29 AM |
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nrthshgrl
It goes fast. Pay attention.
Member since 7/05 57538 total posts
Name:
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Re: WWYD? I need opinions about a friend. (sorry its a little long).
Posted by Marcie
I think you need to sit her down and ask her why she thinks she can talk about you and your family that way
W T F?!
I agree. If it's an old enough friendship, lay it on the table. It sure sounds like she's comfortable saying anything to you.
Also for the cruise in January, is it just the two of you? If so, I would probably consider it a money well spent not going. If it's with DH, I would still go but disregard her.
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| Posted 10/1/07 11:31 AM |
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KGools
Happy
Member since 9/06 9532 total posts
Name:
Kim
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Re: WWYD? I need opinions about a friend. (sorry its a little long).
WOAH! Is she trying to be funny?!?! I would totally not even hesitate to call her out on it! Ask her if she's being funny and even if she says she is tell her how hurtful and mean her "humor" is. GOD, what is wrong with people!?  
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| Posted 10/1/07 11:39 AM |
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Ambersmom
Straight up nasty
Member since 5/05 7740 total posts
Name:
Sharon
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Re: WWYD? I need opinions about a friend. (sorry its a little long).
No way would LI let that stuff slide. Even if you do have money laid out for the cruise, it doesn't mean you have to spend your time with her. She needs a slap down BAD!
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| Posted 10/1/07 11:40 AM |
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MsSissy
xoxoxo
Member since 3/07 39159 total posts
Name:
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Re: WWYD? I need opinions about a friend. (sorry its a little long).
Unfortunatley if you don't confront her now she will think it's acceptable to bad mouth your DH and anything else she doesn't agree with.
And honestly she may not even realize she's offending you. She may think since your best friends she can be blunt. But what she said is more than blunt, it's hurtful and unacceptable.
Since you asked WWYD. I would call her and tell her I need to talk to her about things that were said and we need to clear the air before our trip.
Good luck...
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| Posted 10/1/07 11:41 AM |
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SweetestOfPeas
J'taime Paris!
Member since 3/06 32345 total posts
Name:
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Re: WWYD? I need opinions about a friend. (sorry its a little long).
the absolute NERVE of her! how dare she says those things to you!
I personally wouldn't even care about the $$ for teh cruise. I would never speak to her again! not unless she apologizes BIGTIME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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| Posted 10/1/07 11:49 AM |
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Shelly
She's 7!!!
Member since 8/05 14624 total posts
Name:
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Re: WWYD? I need opinions about a friend. (sorry its a little long).
Posted by nrthshgrl
Posted by Marcie
I think you need to sit her down and ask her why she thinks she can talk about you and your family that way
W T F?!
I agree. If it's an old enough friendship, lay it on the table. It sure sounds like she's comfortable saying anything to you.
Also for the cruise in January, is it just the two of you? If so, I would probably consider it a money well spent not going. If it's with DH, I would still go but disregard her.
ITA! She may think she is being funny- but she is NOT. Tell her that its unacceptable to talk about you, your DH, your family and your house like that. If she won't stop, and its just the two of you- forget about the ticket. Its not worth the aggravation.
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| Posted 10/1/07 11:53 AM |
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Heather617
My Babies
Member since 5/05 2566 total posts
Name:
Heather
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Re: WWYD? I need opinions about a friend. (sorry its a little long).
I think you need to definitely talk to her and see where these feelings are coming from.
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| Posted 10/1/07 1:25 PM |
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CkGm
They get so big, so fast :(
Member since 5/05 13848 total posts
Name:
Christine
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Re: WWYD? I need opinions about a friend. (sorry its a little long).
How did you ever keep your mouth shut? Cruise or no cruise she needs a SIT-DOWN immediately!
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| Posted 10/1/07 1:35 PM |
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Jesaroo
is not the girl you knew
Member since 5/05 14266 total posts
Name:
Jes
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Re: WWYD? I need opinions about a friend. (sorry its a little long).
oh my god! are you kidding me?!?!?!?!
i would be so upset and pizzed!
i dont even know how i would go about dealign with that situation, maybe i would just stop calling her.
i am so sorry.
good luck though.
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| Posted 10/1/07 1:51 PM |
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lvdolphins
My Loves!
Member since 5/05 46292 total posts
Name:
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Re: WWYD? I need opinions about a friend. (sorry its a little long).
Posted by CkGm
How did you ever keep your mouth shut? Cruise or no cruise she needs a SIT-DOWN immediately!
ITA. I don't know how you didn't go off on her right then and there. I would have asked her to leave. When she learns how to stop disrespecting you and your DH then, maybe, just maybe she will be invited back.
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| Posted 10/1/07 2:22 PM |
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MarisaK
HELLO Manolo !!
Member since 5/06 14562 total posts
Name:
Marisa
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Re: WWYD? I need opinions about a friend. (sorry its a little long).
Confront her and tell her she's out of line !! - You didn't ASK for her opinion, and you especially did not ask for such a disrespectful, deliberately hurtful commentary on your life. -
Sometimes when you've been friends for such a long period of time, you tend to turn off your 'sensor' - But really, the things she said were just hateful and mean, they could not be misunderstood or 'taken the wrong way' -
If you don't put her in her place, she's going to think her behavior is acceptable to you -
Has she always been this way ??
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| Posted 10/1/07 2:58 PM |
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skip123
Trying...
Member since 8/06 2759 total posts
Name:
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Re: WWYD? I need opinions about a friend. (sorry its a little long).
I would definitely call her to the things she said and ask her why she felt the need to be so hurtful and see what happens from there...but i dont blame you for feeling the way you do. Those comments were very mean spirited...hugs for you
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| Posted 10/1/07 3:05 PM |
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Maathy317
Grammie's Little Man
Member since 2/06 3235 total posts
Name:
D
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Re: WWYD? I need opinions about a friend. (sorry its a little long).
It doesn't matter how long you have been friends, she was waaaaaaaaaaay out of line! She needs to be spoken to about these comments immediately.
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| Posted 10/1/07 3:43 PM |
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evnme
My little lamb
Member since 8/05 12633 total posts
Name:
aka momma2b
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Re: WWYD? I need opinions about a friend. (sorry its a little long).
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| Posted 10/1/07 3:45 PM |
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SuzyQ
Mama to 3!?!?!?
Member since 7/06 8069 total posts
Name:
Susan
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Re: WWYD? I need opinions about a friend. (sorry its a little long).
Posted by CkGm
How did you ever keep your mouth shut? Cruise or no cruise she needs a SIT-DOWN immediately!
I agree. That kind of rudeness is completely unacceptable, especially from someone who is supposed to be your close friend.
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| Posted 10/1/07 5:32 PM |
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LightUpOurLife
Totally in love
Member since 8/06 12785 total posts
Name:
Bonnie-Jean
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Re: WWYD? I need opinions about a friend. (sorry its a little long).
Unless you say something, she is going to think it is ok for her to say such outrageous things and keep saying them. Like a child, you will have to remind her where the boundaries are. She has crossed them severely!
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| Posted 10/1/07 5:43 PM |
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