Yet another poll...for the exclusively C-section moms.

So many women I know who have only had c-sections tell me they feel less like a woman or a mother because they did not give birth to their DC vaginally. Do you feel that way? I can say that I always thought that was a ridiculous thought, but after my C-section, I felt like I failed.

Re: Yet another poll...for the exclusively C-section moms.

Heck no! I was thrilled! Seriously, the thought of giving birth vaginally scared the cr@p outta me. As it turned out, it was better for me medically if I had one at 37 weeks 5 days, so it was scheduled and I was prepared for one. If things had been different and I didn't have gestational diabetes and extra amniotic fluid - which was why we scheduled the c-section, I wouldn't have asked for a c-section but I was happy and relieved a bit when the dr said she preferred that I have one.

As far as feeling less than a woman, it never occured to me, at all.

Re: Yet another poll...for the exclusively C-section moms.

I definitely felt like I failed or something as a woman at first. I don't know why, but it probably had something to do with my post partum depression, as well. I do not feel badly now, but at the time, I felt like I failed, definitely. Sometimes I feel like I got off easy somehow because I never had to go into labor.

Re: Yet another poll...for the exclusively C-section moms.

No, not at all. I never gave it a second thought. He was breech and that was that. I gave birth to my son, no matter how he came out. I find it somewhat offensive that anyone could say I am less of a mom/mother or whatever.

And then I had a vaginal delivery. Both are truly unbelievable moments as you bring your child into this world.

Message edited 12/8/2006 9:26:50 PM.

xxxxxxx

Message edited 2/9/2007 8:25:42 PM.

Re: Yet another poll...for the exclusively C-section moms.

Well, yes and no.

I did go into labor (but never got to the pushing stage), so I experienced all that...and strangely, I'm really glad I did. I don't feel like less of a woman at all.

However, I did NOT like my c/s. I'm pretty sure I was having a panic attack on the table and the recovery was no walk in the park (while I was in the hospital anyway) either. Soooo...

ultimately, I'm not happy over the c/s since now I'm in a position where there's a good chance I'll have to do it all again. In fact, that's one of the first things I thought about after birth...oh no! I'll have to do this again!! Luckily, my OB supports a VBAC for me, but I can't be induced or be more than a couple of days late...so who knows.

Anyway, of course you're not a failure...are you kidding!! I hope you get the birth experience you want the next time!



PS...I do dig my scar though!

Re: Yet another poll...for the exclusively C-section moms.

Message edited 12/8/2006 9:28:33 PM.

Re: Yet another poll...for the exclusively C-section moms.

I don't feel bad at all! I didn't have a choice, mine was an emergency. The thought of pushing the baby out scared me to death so if I was given the choice of a c-section I probably would have chosen it.

Re: Yet another poll...for the exclusively C-section moms.

Re: Yet another poll...for the exclusively C-section moms.

I'm slightly disappointed by it. I went through labor and pushed for over 2 hours to wind up with a c-section. I wouldn't say I was ever really depressed by having a section but I wasn't happy about it. I'd rather not of had one but in the end it was the safest way for DD to come into the world so that's what I had to do. I don't feel as if I failed, the bigger thing I'm upset about is that my future children will probably have to be c-sections which means I'll miss out on going into labor.

Re: Yet another poll...for the exclusively C-section moms.

Message edited 12/8/2006 9:31:34 PM.

Re: Yet another poll...for the exclusively C-section moms.

what makes you a good mother is how you take care of them while in your belly, and out... not HOW you get them out.

I too was terrified of a vaginal delivery. i would never request one but i'd be lying if I said I wasnt relieved when they scheduled me.

my blood pressure was starting to elevate, I wasnt making any progress and she was measuring large (I know the last part is inaccurate most of the time but she ended up being 9lbs 10oz )

so no, after all this rambling, i never felt like less of a woman or a mother... I actually felt like one of the lucky ones because of how great my c/s experience was. I give v-birth ladies all the credit in the world!

Re: Yet another poll...for the exclusively C-section moms.

Posted by chmlengr

Posted by prncssrachel

Posted by chmlengr

I find it somewhat offensive that anyone could say I am less of a mom/mother or whatever.

I hope you're not referring to me because I don't think this to be true at all!

No, no no! Not you. In general. I've heard it before too. Sorry, I should have been more specific.

Re: Yet another poll...for the exclusively C-section moms.

Posted by prncssrachel
Whew! I was afraid I came off as thinking I believe that! It's a touchy subject to me that I feel people have been cruel to me about, so I would hate for anyone to think I was saying exactly the things that I hate to hear!

Re: Yet another poll...for the exclusively C-section moms.

My worst fear was having a c-section. I sooo did not want one. When I was late, I just had a bad feeling that I'd have one. Sure enough, I was stuck at 8 cm for hours. The Dr. was recommending a c-section because he didn't like what the baby's heartrate was doing, I was stuck at 8 cm, and they weren't sure why I wasn't progressing. I was very upset, but when he left the room for me and DH to talk about it, we realized that as long as the baby came out healthy, it didn't matter how the baby was delivered. I was scared sh*t less on that table, (and I did not love the recovery afterwards) but once he came out and he was so big and he was sunny-side up, I realized I could have labored for hours and hours more and ended up with a c-section anyway. It kind of bothers me that I didn't have him vaginally. I wonder if I could do VBAC with the next, but then I think what if the next one is big too, they'll probably end up scheduling a c-section. I don't feel like less of a woman or anything like that, but I did want to experience a "regular" delivery. Sorry for the ramble!

Re: Yet another poll...for the exclusively C-section moms.

I was not looking forward to my planned c-section & tried to avoid it, but the second she was delivered I was thrilled about it! I wouldn't do it any other way! I had a great experience & a pretty good recovery.

Re: Yet another poll...for the exclusively C-section moms.

I carried my babies, experienced labor to the pushing stage and thanks to the medical ability today was able to have a healthy little girl. Even though I didn't have a little head poking it's way out of my whoo haaa I feel I didn't miss anything. I personally wouldn't want to go through natural labor again This will be my 3rd C-section and I feel no less of a woman/mother than someone who has 3 vaginal births. I just thank GOD for the ability to have my 2 3/4 precious babies.

Message edited 12/8/2006 10:10:04 PM.

Re: Yet another poll...for the exclusively C-section moms.

I'm glad that I had a c-section. I didn't want to imagine the pain of pushing that baby out of there. I only hated the pain afterwards. I was cursing the woman next to me that was walking upright while I was hunched over.

Re: Yet another poll...for the exclusively C-section moms.

When I found out I had preclamcia and my BP was very high, I got very scared for me and the baby's health, and I started to cry that I had to get a c-section, I wanted to have a vaginal birth and I wasn't prepared mentally for a c-section. Once everything was over and Julia was out it ended up being the best thing I ever could of done. I was just so happy my baby girl was ok and healthy.

Re: Yet another poll...for the exclusively C-section moms.

I voted "other" - in a way yes, in a way I don't...

I went through labor, pushing and all that and I felt like I gave up on myself, my nurse and my husband - HOWEVER, Michael's heartrate was dropping with each contraction, I was not progressing and I felt the 2+ hours I pushed was doing nothing but putting my son in jeopardy and so I opted for a c-section for his safety.

I did NOT like the whole procedure (I mean who would) and my recovery was not easy.

If I am ever blessed with another, I would try really hard for a VBAC - we'll see!

Re: Yet another poll...for the exclusively C-section moms.

At first yes, because after 13 hours of labor and pushing for 3.5 hours, I felt the baby should have come vaginally. the kid owed it to me!

then after I had the c-section, I felt great. my recovery was a breeze, I felt almost normal after 6 days- no meds. I also got to expereince the entire labor process- all of the stages so I do not feel like I failed.

Re: Yet another poll...for the exclusively C-section moms.

I answered yes. But I don't feel like I failed as a woman. I had no choice. The baby was in distress and the cord was wrapped around her neck. I just feel like I missed out on something that I did want to experience. That may sound weird, I know, but I would like to have known what it was like.

Re: Yet another poll...for the exclusively C-section moms.

I want ed to deliver my sons vaginally and had Drs that supported this all the way, even though they were twins,a and some Drs go for teh c-section right away. Even after we realized one son had a heart issue they were still going for the vaginal delivery.

I was induced fro 3 days since my other son was not growing anymore, and my body just didn't want to go into labor, so we had to get them out for the safety of my sons.

I was scared and upset and felt like those 3 days were a waste, but I am just glad that my boys were healthy and alive.

I did feel let down in teh beginning and felt like my body failed me, but only after my milki never came in and a slew of other issues one on top of the other did I feel like my body failed me, but it was more of a piling up effect then just the c-section. If I only had a c-section and nothing else, I probably would not have been upset about it.

Now the thought of a vaginal delivery scares me, and I wonder if the c-section was the way to go, LOL.

Re: Yet another poll...for the exclusively C-section moms.

I would of liked to have had that moment when they place the baby on your chest...I was so drugged up and out of it from the c-section that I dont even remember them hanging him over the curtain or showing him to me....I didnt see him until the next day....

Re: Yet another poll...for the exclusively C-section moms.

no way - I would have died if I didn't (if it were the olden days), so there is no way that I can regret it at all. I'm here to talk about it - and so is my son!


I will say that when v-mothers talk about the process, I feel left out, but how many times does that conversation come up?


I'm lucky that I'm on the road to VBAC for this one, but I will not be upset with another c/s.