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MrsGmomof3
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Member since 6/08 3290 total posts
Name: Irrelevant
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Re: Moms/girlfriends night out.... NO NO!
If my husband ever told me that I was NOT ALLOWED to go out with my friends, I would And then when I gained my composure, I would give him some simple instructions on what to do with the kids, get myself dressed and ready, and I would be out the door for a girls night out.
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Posted 10/24/08 12:44 PM |
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Long Island Weddings
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Palebride
I am an amazing bakist
Member since 5/05 13673 total posts
Name: Lori
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Re: Moms/girlfriends night out.... NO NO!
Posted by MrsGmomof3
If my husband ever told me that I was NOT ALLOWED to go out with my friends, I would And then when I gained my composure, I would give him some simple instructions on what to do with the kids, get myself dressed and ready, and I would be out the door for a girls night out.
You're nicer than I am- I wouldn't even leave the instructions, I'd grab my coat and wallet and go.
How dare he tell you what you can and can't do!
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Posted 10/24/08 1:08 PM |
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mommy2bella
Where does time go?
Member since 12/05 9747 total posts
Name: Kelly
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Re: Moms/girlfriends night out.... NO NO!
I go out because I would go insane if I didn't. DH and I try to go out at least 2 times a month whether it's together or it's him staying home and I go out (and vice versa) I am grabbing dinner with family tonight.
Bella is asleep at 8 pm, am I supposed to stay home and do nothing because that is what I am "supposed to do"??
I guess you can say I "gallavant"...I have dinner, sometimes drinks, and gasp...I go to bars!
This is why I am always repeating my mantra... "Children should change your life, not BE your life." I feel that you need an identity outside of just being a mom with your kids...if that means coffee nights, dinner nights with friends, knitting nights, or as a PP said going to Barnes and Noble just to get YOU time...then you have every right to do that.
Does your DH go out with his friends?
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Posted 10/24/08 3:10 PM |
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EmmaNick
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Member since 12/06 16001 total posts
Name: *
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Re: Moms/girlfriends night out.... NO NO!
Posted by Mikismom
the day DH told me I could not go out with my girlfriends is the day he would be packing his sh!t.
You are allowed to go out once in a while with your friends.
ITA!!!
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Posted 10/24/08 3:11 PM |
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littlejoy06
Love
Member since 3/07 6944 total posts
Name:
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Re: Moms/girlfriends night out.... NO NO!
WOW, I would have said, Okay, thanks for your opinion, but I'm going anyway.
Does he go out with his friends??
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Posted 10/24/08 3:14 PM |
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EmmaNick
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Member since 12/06 16001 total posts
Name: *
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Re: Moms/girlfriends night out.... NO NO!
Posted by longislemom
This morning he called from work to apologize and said 'once in a while' wouldnt be bad, he is just concerned for my safety because of drunkards at nights, guys who may flirt with me etc... whatever....
I know Im gona start stepp'n out with my girls tho......
Guys who may flirt with you and worried about your safety? He seriously needs to grow up. You are mother of his children and I highly doubt you plan to leave him for a random guy in a bar. If he doesn't question your safety when you are out and about any other time, he shouldn't question your safety when you are out with your GF's.
He's your husband, not your father. Go out and have fun.
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Posted 10/24/08 3:15 PM |
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Bxgell2
Perfection
Member since 5/05 16438 total posts
Name: Beth
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Re: Moms/girlfriends night out.... NO NO!
I would be livid if my husband forbid me from going out with my girlfiriends. Marriage is based on mutual respect and trust - if you need a break with the girls, there is absolutely NOTHING wrong with that. I don't do it nearly enough, but that's because I meet up with my friends at least once a week for lunch when I'm at work.
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Posted 10/24/08 3:15 PM |
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SuzyQ
Mama to 3!?!?!?
Member since 7/06 8069 total posts
Name: Susan
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Re: Moms/girlfriends night out.... NO NO!
Posted by Summerrluvv
Posted by longislemom
This morning he called from work to apologize and said 'once in a while' wouldnt be bad, he is just concerned for my safety because of drunkards at nights, guys who may flirt with me etc... whatever....
I know Im gona start stepp'n out with my girls tho......
Guys who may flirt with you and worried about your safety? He seriously needs to grow up. You are mother of his children and I highly doubt you plan to leave him for a random guy in a bar. If he doesn't question your safety when you are out and about any other time, he shouldn't question your safety when you are out with your GF's.
He's your husband, not your father. Go out and have fun.
Well said. I wish I live close enough to my friends to go out on a regular basis. My DH very much encourages me to go out on my own to get some "me" time. It's my own fault that I choose to go to Target or food shopping. I plan on doing more fun me things soon. When I do leave him with DD, he certainly appreciates how hard it is to take care of her on my own. It's quite refreshing actually.
You should absolutely go out with your friends. I'm sure you only go to safe areas, so your DH's worries sound a little odd to me.
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Posted 10/24/08 3:20 PM |
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monkeybride
My Everything
Member since 5/05 20541 total posts
Name:
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Re: Moms/girlfriends night out.... NO NO!
I would be really annoyed at my DH if he acted like that. I think my DH actually likes when I go out because them I'm not home nagging him . He never says NO if I ask if it's an OK night to get out without him.
I think that you need to approach your DH and find out why he feels that way. Of course you can yell and scream and just go anyway but what fun would you have if you knew you were going to come home to him PO'd. Hopefully if you two can talk about it and you can ease any concerns he has then you will get your girl time whenever you need it.
Now if he's a total jerk and won't talk about it and doesn't compromise then that's crap. You are a wife and a mother. There are no rules that come with those roles that say you can't have friends and time to enjoy yourself alone.
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Posted 10/24/08 3:45 PM |
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pinkandblue
Our family is complete, maybe
Member since 9/05 32436 total posts
Name: Stephanie
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Re: Moms/girlfriends night out.... NO NO!
and FTR, on nights I do go out with my friends, which is rare lately as my BF is 8 months pregnant, I go when miki is in bed already so there is not much for dh to do
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Posted 10/24/08 3:48 PM |
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HillW9608
Hello Summer!
Member since 5/08 5916 total posts
Name: Hill
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Re: Moms/girlfriends night out.... NO NO!
Posted by nferrandi
I would be floored if DH said that to me. I guess your DH has just gotten so used to you being around, that he can't see your point of view right now. But you need to make him see it. You have every right to have some alone adult time.
ITA!
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Posted 10/24/08 3:56 PM |
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dm24angel
Happiness
Member since 5/05 34581 total posts
Name: Donna
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Re: Moms/girlfriends night out.... NO NO!
Posted by Summerrluvv
Posted by longislemom
This morning he called from work to apologize and said 'once in a while' wouldnt be bad, he is just concerned for my safety because of drunkards at nights, guys who may flirt with me etc... whatever....
I know Im gona start stepp'n out with my girls tho......
Guys who may flirt with you and worried about your safety? He seriously needs to grow up. You are mother of his children and I highly doubt you plan to leave him for a random guy in a bar. If he doesn't question your safety when you are out and about any other time, he shouldn't question your safety when you are out with your GF's.
He's your husband, not your father. Go out and have fun.
exactly...one I would go anyway and two I would probably not be speaking to him for even uttering the words NO based on his reasoning.
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Posted 10/24/08 8:58 PM |
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Kidsaplenty
Sister love
Member since 2/06 5971 total posts
Name: Stephanie
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Re: Moms/girlfriends night out.... NO NO!
I think he's being ridiculous. You deserve time out with your friends. Doesn't he get time out too?
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Posted 10/24/08 9:06 PM |
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CunningOne
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Member since 5/05 26975 total posts
Name:
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Re: Moms/girlfriends night out.... NO NO!
I'd be pizzed at DH is he ever told me I couldn't go out with my friends. I do it when we can (and it doesn't seem like enough!) and I enjoy it. I need it! I crave it It helps me feel like I have friends outside of being a mommy. I hope you get your chance to go out.
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Posted 10/24/08 9:33 PM |
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sunflowerjesss
Mommy to 3!
Member since 10/05 20369 total posts
Name: Jesss, duh.
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Re: Moms/girlfriends night out.... NO NO!
Ouch!!! PP have pretty much hit the nail on the head. Your DH is not being fair. You aren't going to clubs and bars looking for the latest hookup. You simply just want some adult time with people that are not connected with your family.
I did my first Moms Night Out when Ryan was a little over 3 months. DH knew Ryan wouldn't sleep without me in the house (which he was right about) but knew if I didn't do it then, I'd never do it. And he knew I needed it.
Although I don't think your request needs permission or explanation...but maybe your DH doesn't see it from your perspective? Try re-explaining it.
Hope it works out
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Posted 10/24/08 9:45 PM |
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dyannasez
LIF Zygote
Member since 2/08 30 total posts
Name: Dyanna
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Re: Moms/girlfriends night out.... NO NO!
Yeah that is absolutely ridic! He cant own youuuuuuuuuu! Does he go out?
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Posted 10/24/08 10:18 PM |
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longislemom
LIF Adult
Member since 8/06 912 total posts
Name:
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Re: Moms/girlfriends night out.... NO NO!
sigh... well.. We talked about it again last night and he says he can live with once a month... argggh..
all i could do was laugh and say "Thank you Sir for your permission". then I went to bed - Im was mentally exhausted...
nope he does not go out at all once he is home unless to get groceries etc.
He has no explanation except that we have a beautiful home and I should be content in it, looking after the kids etc. why do i need to go 'out'. I honestly never knew this was his opinion on this matter - but I guess everything doesnt come out before you get hitched.
You are all right, this is so ridiculous I cant believe its my own husband acting like this.
Thanks again everyone for your letting me vent.
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Posted 10/25/08 7:04 AM |
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sometimesmommy
Always in my heart.....
Member since 11/06 6686 total posts
Name:
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Re: Moms/girlfriends night out.... NO NO!
It would have sparked a discussion in my house and if he continued being stubborn I guess somebody better be guarding the door cause I WAS GOING OUT. There are many facets of being a mother so he needs to understand that you need alone time too with your girls..
Message edited 10/25/2008 8:15:25 AM.
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Posted 10/25/08 8:15 AM |
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