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Re: Cliques at work?
yes, between those of all ages there are obvious nasty cliques at my job. Last week I got a comment from my supervisor "Aww, she is eating alone" in a making-fun-of sort way. Yep, this is from a 50 year old man. Tasteless.
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Posted 4/7/09 7:26 AM  |
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Long Island Weddings
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JP826
=)
Member since 9/06 10903 total posts
Name:
Me!! All about ME!
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Re: Cliques at work?
Some people just mentally never leave High School.
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| Posted 4/7/09 8:27 AM |
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neener1211
:-)
Member since 4/07 22952 total posts
Name:
J
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Re: Cliques at work?
It is not the women at my job, it is the MEN! They go to the bathroom, to lunch, outside to smoke cigarettes all together. If they are paged in the office more than once, we know they are outside together. So annoying.
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| Posted 4/7/09 8:47 AM |
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Christine
2nd verse same as the 1st
Member since 5/05 15287 total posts
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Re: Cliques at work?
I don't think it's that big a deal. My office has several groups of people that are friends and do things together inside and outside of work hours. I don't expect to be friends with everyone I work with so I guess my expectations are pretty low in this area. I used to smoke, not smoke, diet, not diet with friends here - we did that to have a diet buddy or extra support. We didn't exclude people to be rude, mean or catty but I don't feel bad for not liking everyone since I know not everyone likes me either. That's just part of human nature.
I do think it's rude to talk loudly in your office and disrupt your work.
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| Posted 4/7/09 9:03 AM |
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groovypeg
:)
Member since 5/05 2423 total posts
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Re: Cliques at work?
liza, you know what's going on by me, so i can totally relate. i have never seen so many catty people, including men, at one job!
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| Posted 4/7/09 9:12 AM |
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KartveliT
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Member since 1/08 8363 total posts
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Re: Cliques at work?
Not to me but I know someone very close to me who is going through the same thing. It can be very frustrating and I'm sorry you are going through this.
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| Posted 4/7/09 9:20 AM |
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Nik211
my little monkey<3
Member since 5/08 3303 total posts
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Nik
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Re: Cliques at work?
i think this goes on in a lot of offices - i am a wh0re and go from group to group in my office  i try to socialize and BS with more than just "my group" b/c i dont see myself as part of the "clique" im more of a free spirit hahaha......but i wouldnt take it to heart, do you really want to be "friends" with these people anyway?
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| Posted 4/7/09 9:22 AM |
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Diana1215
Living on a prayer!!!
Member since 10/05 29450 total posts
Name:
Diana
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Re: Cliques at work?
When I worked full time we def. had a clique of girls who did everything together (lunch, go shopping, etc)
We were never rude or mean to anyone but we just had a lot in common and wanted to spend our free time with each other. I doubt they are intentionally leaving you out - but like you said, it doesn't sound like you have much in common, and women usually gravitate to other women that they have similarities with! 
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| Posted 4/7/09 9:24 AM |
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lucyloo
nope
Member since 1/06 9758 total posts
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Re: Cliques at work?
I mostly work with all men. When I first started my current job all the guys would go out to lunch together and leave me here. It was really annoying. It's like hello I'd like to come too. Then 2 of them left and no one goes out anymore. 
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| Posted 4/7/09 9:25 AM |
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anonttcer
BOOOO for fall!
Member since 7/06 10082 total posts
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Meaning a NON ttcer!
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Re: Cliques at work?
That's why I hate working with women... men are so much nicer IMO.
My take on it is this- they were probably on the outside of the cliques in high school and so they are making up for it now- by having their own little clique and treating others the way they were treated. It makes them feel more powerful and better about their sad pasts.... 
I know it stinks to work in an environment like that though- regardless of the reason...
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| Posted 4/7/09 9:33 AM |
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justme4u
LIF Adolescent
Member since 8/08 575 total posts
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Re: Cliques at work?
Posted by anonttcer
That's why I hate working with women... men are so much nicer IMO.
My take on it is this- they were probably on the outside of the cliques in high school and so they are making up for it now- by having their own little clique and treating others the way they were treated. It makes them feel more powerful and better about their sad pasts....
I know it stinks to work in an environment like that though- regardless of the reason...
I think you are 100% right. Sad , isn't it?
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| Posted 4/7/09 9:42 AM |
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Shelly
She's 7!!!
Member since 8/05 14624 total posts
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Re: Cliques at work?
Posted by anonttcer
That's why I hate working with women... men are so much nicer IMO.
I disagree. I used to work with all men- and it was worse. I don't know if they were dense or what, but they would always go out to get lunch and eat in the conference room and not include me. They would order and not tell me. It got so frustrating- they all made sure to get one another- but just wouldn't include me- the one woman. It made me miserable!!
And when we finally got 2 new female lawyers, they did the same thing to them.  Finally we girls just did our own thing, but for ONE YEAR it was very lonely.
ETA: To liza, I know how much it sux. I've been there. Just hold your head up high and know you aren't missing much. Its tough when you have nothing in common wiht the people you work with.
Message edited 4/9/2009 3:36:00 PM.
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| Posted 4/9/09 3:34 PM |
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Little-J-Mommy
I'm a Big Brother
Member since 5/06 8041 total posts
Name:
D
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Re: Cliques at work?
Posted by lipglossjunky73
I just wish there was more togetherness because there so many great projects I would love to see happen here. It's like they hate my ambition or something. 
Also... They are single, and honestly, I have a different life from them that maybe they can't relate to. If they all had boyfriends they would drop each other in a second. It just makes for a very sorority-feeling, annoying workplace....
I think you hit the nail on the head here. People don't really always appreciate ambitious people. They think it either makes them look bad....or they have to actually WORK to maintain their position
I think the other part is the lack of commonalities. Misery loves company. You're not miserable. While you may be broke (as am I) you're incredibly blessed and happy with a great hubby and fab family. While they're all commiserating over roast beef sandwiches that men sukc, at least they have their ciggs to get through the day
don't sweat it, because I predict you are absolutely correct....as soon as men come into the picture, they will drop each other like flies and who needs people like that in their life
I'll be in "your" clique
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| Posted 4/10/09 8:50 AM |
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smdl
I love Gary too..on a plate!
Member since 5/06 32461 total posts
Name:
me
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Re: Cliques at work?
I can understand "friendship" at work. People doing lunch together and only them. BUT some of those groups have real mental issues. I mean... like they are teens in high school and it's "we don't talk to her". I never understood that. I treat a place of business as a "professional" place and friendships may happen but they NEVER take priority over professionalism.
I don't miss the corporate World. I really don't.
But drama is every where, every job. I smile, say hello, mind my own business, do my job and leave. It's much easier that way. I don't get involved! I had my share of drama at work. I REFUSE to be part of it! That's why I changed careers in the 1st place.
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| Posted 4/11/09 10:19 PM |
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PennyCat
Just call me mommy :)
Member since 7/08 19084 total posts
Name:
Jib
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Re: Cliques at work?
Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh Puh-LEASEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
I can give you a PERFECT example of this!
I work with a group of women have slumber parties and go on vacations together. They are GROWN WOMEN! It's SICK! And, they snub anyone who isn't in their little "group". It's SO obnoxious and makes for a tense work environment because it's like "us" and "them".
They are teachers, by the way.
Edited to say that I have joined them for lunch on a few occasions only to hear them reveal looooooooooooads of graphic info about their sex life, that they so openly share at work.
I know this situation is bizarre and uncommon, but it is the absolute 100% truth! 
Message edited 4/11/2009 10:30:41 PM.
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| Posted 4/11/09 10:28 PM |
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dpli
Daylight savings :)
Member since 5/05 13973 total posts
Name:
D
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Re: Cliques at work?
Posted by Little-J-Mommy
Posted by lipglossjunky73
I just wish there was more togetherness because there so many great projects I would love to see happen here. It's like they hate my ambition or something.
Also... They are single, and honestly, I have a different life from them that maybe they can't relate to. If they all had boyfriends they would drop each other in a second. It just makes for a very sorority-feeling, annoying workplace....
I think you hit the nail on the head here. People don't really always appreciate ambitious people. They think it either makes them look bad....or they have to actually WORK to maintain their position
ITA. Your ambition may show how much more they could be doing in their jobs, but choose not to, so it might make them look bad.
And to the teachers who posted....as a former teacher, who has had many full time and part time jobs over the years, I found teachers to be the WORST when it comes to cliques and leaving people out. It's really too bad, since ideally they should be modelling the behavior we would want to see from students. It's one of the reasons I left education.
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| Posted 4/14/09 3:34 PM |
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HarleyGirlFLA
Come on in
Member since 5/05 9674 total posts
Name:
Mel
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Re: Cliques at work?
Posted by Phyl
Posted by lipglossjunky73
Like, get this - my office mate quit smoking, so as a joke - I asked "Oh no, what will Tanya do now (name changed)?" Because they ALWAYS have to go out for a smoke together. She said - "Oh, she quit too."
Then a week later, my officemate started smoking again. So did Tanya. I'm saying it's THAT bad!!!! 
I have never experienced anything like this EVER - not even in middle school or HS - I always avoided cliques, but I was friends with everyone so was never on the outside....
The above senario reminds me of a Friends episode where Rachel was left out of opportunities because she wasn't outside at the smoke break!
that just had me PIMP. In my group I am the only one that does not smoke. After any meetings the smokers all went outside to get their fix and I was left inside doing everything waiting for them to come back in. So I would often feel left out because I wasn't outside on the smoke break
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| Posted 4/14/09 9:50 PM |
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Re: Cliques at work?
Posted by lehcar
I almost think that cliques get worse when people get older. It's quite annoying. At my last job, for my first faculty meeting, I walked in when there were a few people there and sat down in an empty seat and waited for the meeting to start. I knew no one. The next thing I know, whispers started and all of the people around me (except one) got up and moved to the other side of the room! The one girl that remained told me they treat every new person like that Because of that, I've made myself the welcoming committee at my current job when we have new people because I know how bad it sucks to be left out in the cold. To hell with those grown, insecure women.
wow, a similar thing happened to me at a job and i became the "welcoming committee" too. it felt so nice to be able to be the positive energy in a room.
*** and it's soooo true - misery loves company.
Message edited 4/20/2009 11:40:10 AM.
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| Posted 4/20/09 11:38 AM |
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