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KimberlyScott
Graceyn=My World <3
Member since 10/08 4173 total posts
Name:
Kimberly
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New Approach
Well, I've decided to revert back to my old approach and not get involved with DH's decisions about SS. I will always be there for SS but, I will no longer say ok, yes, or no. It will have to be ask your dad. Let's hope this works. DH doesn't believe that I can do this b/c I've said it before but, this time I mean it. I might be posting more often so I can vent. I hope you guys don't mind.
It really sucks wanting to be a mom to a child that isn't yours and doing all of the mom stuff yet you can't have a say in decisions on raising him.
Why did I think this was going to be different?
Message edited 5/1/2009 11:21:09 AM.
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Posted 5/1/09 11:19 AM  |
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Re: New Approach
Vent away!! 
We're all in this together. 
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| Posted 5/1/09 12:40 PM |
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Lucky2008
LIF Adult
Member since 5/08 1005 total posts
Name:
Chris
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Re: New Approach
feel free to vent anytime as we all have been there and will continue to have these moments as well.
Being a stepparent isn't easy at all and luckily we have this board to come to.
I can understand how you feel, I too eventually took the "back off" approach with SD when things got quite ugly last year.
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| Posted 5/1/09 2:02 PM |
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1stimemom
Love my boys
Member since 2/08 8766 total posts
Name:
Mrs Dee
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Re: New Approach
I thought it would be very different, too. Being a stepmom is a thankless, stressful job. I know exactly how you feel. I decided to back off long ago after the 10th time things got really ugly, because I was starting to get very angry, hurt and resentful. Stepping back took alot, but it is more liberating and for me it saved what was left of my sanity. Good luck - we are here for you any time you want to vent 
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| Posted 5/1/09 3:30 PM |
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MrsSteflily
I love chocolate
Member since 4/06 2047 total posts
Name:
Stef
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Re: New Approach
It's called detatchment.
Very hard to do but worth it for yourself.
I never could do it, especially being custodial. Hang in there. Go for lots of walks and have someone to call every time something happens that you would want to interject.
Or come on here and one of us will be here for you.
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| Posted 5/1/09 5:26 PM |
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Lucky2008
LIF Adult
Member since 5/08 1005 total posts
Name:
Chris
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Re: New Approach
Posted by 1stimemom
I thought it would be very different, too. Being a stepmom is a thankless, stressful job. I know exactly how you feel. I decided to back off long ago after the 10th time things got really ugly, because I was starting to get very angry, hurt and resentful. Stepping back took alot, but it is more liberating and for me it saved what was left of my sanity. Good luck - we are here for you any time you want to vent
That is exact word to describe how I started to feel too - resentful
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| Posted 5/2/09 10:36 AM |
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ThePinkGoose
In Your Hands
Member since 8/08 4706 total posts
Name:
Nunya
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Re: New Approach
Feel free to vent away. Just a note...when I took the backing off approach, I back off of everything. As I explained to my SD, if she wanted me to "butt out" when she needed disciplining, then I was "Butting Out" when she wanted cool new jeans or UGGS too. I have a feeling your SS will be crawing back very soon.
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| Posted 5/2/09 10:17 PM |
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Re: New Approach
Its so hard, especially when you feel you may be the only voice of reason at times because your decision isn't based on guilt (which dads feel) or resentment or incompetence (moms and/or dads depending on the side your on  )
I took that stance a while back, and I still feel like my SD's don't like me anymore 
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| Posted 5/3/09 7:38 AM |
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mcd01
Life is good : )
Member since 3/09 1932 total posts
Name:
Melissa
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Re: New Approach
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| Posted 5/9/09 11:51 AM |
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ziamaria
I love this boy!
Member since 4/07 3372 total posts
Name:
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Re: New Approach
how's it working out so far?
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| Posted 5/9/09 8:58 PM |
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