how long did you wait to go back to work??

so... I just want to see what the average length of time is that people took off from work after their miscarriage.

for me i took the week that i found out about my m/c off.... then the week after (which i was in physical pain from the d and c).
i tried to go back yesterday... and it just killed me.... i don't think i was ready yet. i feel like i took a few steps backwards now. so i took today and tomorrow off too. fri i have a dr appt.... so then i'll go back Monday. i don't think i'll ever be ready.

I'm also having issues with my job.... not too sure i want to work there anymore either.

im trying to sort my brain out....

Message edited 1/28/2010 2:37:49 AM.

Re: how long did you wait to go back to work??

i took off the days from when i found out and then a few days after my d&c...its different for each of us and eventually it gets easier

Re: how long did you wait to go back to work??

I had about 6 weeks total off of work, the wonderful midwife advised that I have 3-4 weeks to get back to normal and than I had an additional 2 off. My doctor signed me off, in the end I would have been okay to go back sooner, but I took the time that was recommended to me anyway!

Re: how long did you wait to go back to work??

I had taken a day or so when my #'s were jumping all around. During winter break( I am teacher) I was already home when I found out there was no longer a heartbeat.. I needed about 3 days with DNC and after.Going back to work was not easy but nothing was. I knew I needed to get back to work to get my head back into normalcy. It's hard when you are not enjoying work either. I think you need to do what is best for you but know nothing will feel perfect for a bit (-:

Re: how long did you wait to go back to work??

I went to work the same day we learned there was no h/b. I needed to stay busy.

My D&C was Thursday, so I went back to work the following Monday.

Re: how long did you wait to go back to work??

I took about a full week from the day I found out till a few days after the d&c. It also was a bit easier for me to go back bc it is mine and DH's business so if I felt uneasy or not up to working I left early or at least had him there with me.

I know it doesn't seem like it now, but it will get easier after a while. There were days after the d&c (weeks even) that I would just breakdown and sob, loud hard gut wrenching sobs. I felt like I would never ever get over the pain. I still get upset when I think about it but nowhere near where I was those first few weeks.

Re: how long did you wait to go back to work??

I took off for about 1 weeks, and then this last time was during the Holiday Vacation and I had off a total of 3 weeks with extra vacation time.

Take as much time as you need. Everyone heals differently and some people like to get back to work to take their mind off of everything. Since you are not that thrilled with work....I can imagine it adds more stress. : (


I promise you will start to feel better and begin to heal. You will always have those days when you are sad ( I have them) but then you go back to feeling hopeful and excited to get to your end result, a baby!

I hope you get to relax and just take this week for yourself while you are off. Maybe go get a massage or do something fun!

Re: how long did you wait to go back to work??

I've had 2 MCs~ 1 last May and the other last October. I miscarried naturally for both of them.

I didn't take any time off for the first one. I did leave work early a few times for sonos while the MC was being diagnosed.

The second one I left early on a Tuesday because I started the mc at work. (I knew that I was going to mc and was trying to decide on whether or not to do a D&C.) I returned to work the following Monday. So I was out for 3-1/2 days. (I actually only stayed home because I was in physical pain from the MC on and off for the following 3 days and passing clots.) I was further along when I had the second one and in hind sight, there were a few days that I probably shouldn't have been at work leading up to the MC.

I work at a pretty small office. Everyone that I work with knows that I've had these MCs. Maybe that's part of the reason I was comfortable not really taking much time for it. Plus I also felt like being busy working kept my mind off of what had happened.

Re: how long did you wait to go back to work??

I was off for a week. Everyone at work was very understanding about my situation. Talking about it and looking at it in a positive way helped me to deal with the loss of the baby.

Re: how long did you wait to go back to work??

I'm so sorry . I don't work, as I stay home with my son, but I wanted to offer some hugs. After it happened I couldn't cry or anything as I didn't want to upset my son or think he did something wrong etc., but the min. my husband came home and I told him I just cried all night long in my bedroom.

It's such a hard thing to go through, and if you need more time, I think you owe it to yourself to give yourself that time. But also understand that sometimes it will come out of nowhere that we feel so sad, and its completely normal.

I hope that things start to get better for you, and maybe your even able to find a new job that you will love

Re: how long did you wait to go back to work??

I took off exactly one week. It was hard to go back but when I did I wished I went back sooner b/c I spent that whole week miserable at home. I felt like going back made me feel better.

Re: how long did you wait to go back to work??

We lost our child the weekend before Thanksgiving, so it was a short week at work. I took the week off leading up to that then went back. I cried the first day, and was not myself the days following, but I eventually felt better that my mind was on other things.

Re: how long did you wait to go back to work??

I didn't take much time off at all actually. Being that it was so early and I didnt need a D & C there wasn't much physical 'healing' - a little, but not much. I feel like it was more emotional than anything else. The first time i took off 3 days and the second time I took off 2

Re: how long did you wait to go back to work??

wow ... so different.

thank you for answering!