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headoverheels
s'il vous plaît
Member since 6/07 42079 total posts
Name:
LB
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How do you handle this?
Your child (21 months) is playing with a toy at a park, and an older child comes along and wants to play with the same toy. Older child tries to pull your child away from that toy (not super aggressively, just that they don't want to share  ). Mom of older child is not nearby that you can see.
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Posted 6/16/10 9:13 AM  |
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BethanyLynn
Love these munchkins
Member since 10/09 6295 total posts
Name:
Bethany
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Re: How do you handle this?
Remove my child from the situation...play with another toy just to avoid the drama....
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| Posted 6/16/10 9:15 AM |
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MikesWife
Wanting...........
Member since 1/06 6887 total posts
Name:
Karen
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Re: How do you handle this?
A park toy? I would probably tell my child that we need to share and let the new little boy/girl play with the toy.
Ideally the new little child's mom would have stopped him/her but since that wasn't the case, I would just remove my kid from the situation.
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| Posted 6/16/10 9:16 AM |
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NinaLemon
It's a boy!!!
Member since 10/07 6453 total posts
Name:
Jeannine
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Re: How do you handle this?
If we had been playing a while, I might say to the older child "would you like a turn?" and then tell my child "let's give him/her a turn"
If we just got on the toy I'd tell the older child to wait his/her turn (nicely, not abruptly or meanly) and then let my child know he can play for X minutes and then we will let the other child have a turn.
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| Posted 6/16/10 9:19 AM |
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jambalady
Is it summer yet?
Member since 8/06 7392 total posts
Name:
Holly
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Re: How do you handle this?
Posted by NinaLemon
If we had been playing a while, I might say to the older child "would you like a turn?" and then tell my child "let's give him/her a turn"
If we just got on the toy I'd tell the older child to wait his/her turn (nicely, not abruptly or meanly) and then let my child know he can play for X minutes and then we will let the other child have a turn.
I would do the same.
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| Posted 6/16/10 9:21 AM |
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MarisaK
HELLO Manolo !!
Member since 5/06 14562 total posts
Name:
Marisa
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Re: How do you handle this?
Posted by NinaLemon
If we had been playing a while, I might say to the older child "would you like a turn?" and then tell my child "let's give him/her a turn"
If we just got on the toy I'd tell the older child to wait his/her turn (nicely, not abruptly or meanly) and then let my child know he can play for X minutes and then we will let the other child have a turn.
This, to me, is the right thing to do by your own kid - However, and I know this is probably wrong of ME as his mother  - but I have found MANY people to be overly sensitive about their kids and who is speaking to them and 'how' ........so I'd be paranoid that the mother would ignore the fact that her kid was trying to take the toy away from my kdi, but as soon as I said something to her kid (nicely or not) she'd throw a fit........KWIM?
I'd tell Sean it's nice to share, and I'd find something else to occupy him with -
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| Posted 6/16/10 9:24 AM |
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brownie
Baby #1 is here!
Member since 11/08 13903 total posts
Name:
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Re: How do you handle this?
Posted by NinaLemon
If we had been playing a while, I might say to the older child "would you like a turn?" and then tell my child "let's give him/her a turn"
If we just got on the toy I'd tell the older child to wait his/her turn (nicely, not abruptly or meanly) and then let my child know he can play for X minutes and then we will let the other child have a turn.
Same here
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| Posted 6/16/10 9:25 AM |
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CrankyPants
I'm cranky
Member since 7/06 18178 total posts
Name:
Mama Cranky
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Re: How do you handle this?
Posted by brownie
Posted by NinaLemon
If we had been playing a while, I might say to the older child "would you like a turn?" and then tell my child "let's give him/her a turn"
If we just got on the toy I'd tell the older child to wait his/her turn (nicely, not abruptly or meanly) and then let my child know he can play for X minutes and then we will let the other child have a turn.
Same here
I'd do something similar. Although honestly, I don't want my child learning that it is okay to walk up to another child and take a toy so I wouldn't want to reward the other child for pulling the toy away.
Instead, I would tell my child that they could play for 3 more minutes and then it's "this little boy's turn", or something like that.
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| Posted 6/16/10 9:42 AM |
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Diana1215
Living on a prayer!!!
Member since 10/05 29450 total posts
Name:
Diana
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Re: How do you handle this?
At that age I would have taken my child to another toy because they really don't care or know the difference.
When they hit 2/2.5 I would do what the others are saying and if we just got to the toy tell the older child that we will be done shortly. If we were there for a long time I would tell Jack that he has to share and it's someone else's turn.
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| Posted 6/16/10 9:45 AM |
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FelAndJon
needs to update her avatar pic
Member since 6/05 10212 total posts
Name:
Felice (aka LuckyBride2004)
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Re: How do you handle this?
Posted by NinaLemon
If we had been playing a while, I might say to the older child "would you like a turn?" and then tell my child "let's give him/her a turn"
If we just got on the toy I'd tell the older child to wait his/her turn (nicely, not abruptly or meanly) and then let my child know he can play for X minutes and then we will let the other child have a turn.
At that age, that is what we would do. If it were my older child, I might treat the situation differently or let them handle it them selves 
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| Posted 6/16/10 9:51 AM |
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headoverheels
s'il vous plaît
Member since 6/07 42079 total posts
Name:
LB
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Re: How do you handle this?
Posted by Diana1215
At that age I would have taken my child to another toy because they really don't care or know the difference.
When they hit 2/2.5 I would do what the others are saying and if we just got to the toy tell the older child that we will be done shortly. If we were there for a long time I would tell Jack that he has to share and it's someone else's turn.
Oh believe me, he absolutely knows the difference!
I did what others suggested - told the older child that we were going to share. He seemed to respond well at first, but after only about 30 seconds he was pulling and trying to get to the toy again. At that point I decided to remove him from the toy, although I knew it would cause a tantrum - and it did 
My DS had just gotten to the toy, he wasn't there long at all, maybe a minute.
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| Posted 6/16/10 9:54 AM |
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Janice
Sweet Jessie Quinn
Member since 5/05 27567 total posts
Name:
Janice
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Re: How do you handle this?
I tell older kid he would like his toy back, thanks.
I had a kid who knew the rules early on and never took a toy away...there is no way I would let a kid run off with a toy grabbed from him.
If my kid wasn't playing with it, then all are welcomed to it.
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| Posted 6/16/10 9:58 AM |
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nrthshgrl
It goes fast. Pay attention.
Member since 7/05 57538 total posts
Name:
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Re: How do you handle this?
Posted by NinaLemon
If we had been playing a while, I might say to the older child "would you like a turn?" and then tell my child "let's give him/her a turn"
If we just got on the toy I'd tell the older child to wait his/her turn (nicely, not abruptly or meanly) and then let my child know he can play for X minutes and then we will let the other child have a turn.
ITA
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| Posted 6/16/10 10:00 AM |
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mommyof2tobe
LIF Infant
Member since 1/07 50 total posts
Name:
Me
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Re: How do you handle this?
Posted by NinaLemon
If we had been playing a while, I might say to the older child "would you like a turn?" and then tell my child "let's give him/her a turn"
If we just got on the toy I'd tell the older child to wait his/her turn (nicely, not abruptly or meanly) and then let my child know he can play for X minutes and then we will let the other child have a turn.
This is exactly what I would do and expect to have done for me in the opposite situation - where my child was the new one.
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| Posted 6/16/10 10:20 AM |
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LoriH
There's no place like home
Member since 8/07 4110 total posts
Name:
Lori
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Re: How do you handle this?
Posted by CrankyPants
Posted by brownie
Posted by NinaLemon
If we had been playing a while, I might say to the older child "would you like a turn?" and then tell my child "let's give him/her a turn"
If we just got on the toy I'd tell the older child to wait his/her turn (nicely, not abruptly or meanly) and then let my child know he can play for X minutes and then we will let the other child have a turn.
Same here
I'd do something similar. Although honestly, I don't want my child learning that it is okay to walk up to another child and take a toy so I wouldn't want to reward the other child for pulling the toy away.
Instead, I would tell my child that they could play for 3 more minutes and then it's "this little boy's turn", or something like that.
I do the same.
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| Posted 6/16/10 10:50 AM |
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MrsFlatbread
Skinny jeans are in my future
Member since 6/06 10258 total posts
Name:
Baby Momma
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Re: How do you handle this?
I would tell my child it's time to take turns and head for another toy.
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| Posted 6/16/10 10:55 AM |
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babymakes3
Almost there!
Member since 7/06 7376 total posts
Name:
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Re: How do you handle this?
Posted by NinaLemon
If we had been playing a while, I might say to the older child "would you like a turn?" and then tell my child "let's give him/her a turn"
If we just got on the toy I'd tell the older child to wait his/her turn (nicely, not abruptly or meanly) and then let my child know he can play for X minutes and then we will let the other child have a turn.
ITA
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| Posted 6/16/10 11:16 AM |
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maybesoon
LIF Adult
Member since 9/09 5981 total posts
Name:
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Re: How do you handle this?
my 20 month old will not allow anyone to take anything away from him if he really wants it  I usually leave him alone and let the situation play itself out meaning my DS will ultimately end up with the toy
I intervene if the child is younger or if DS has been playing for a long time by saying oh lets share etc
Message edited 6/16/2010 4:13:00 PM.
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| Posted 6/16/10 4:12 PM |
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InShock
life is good
Member since 10/06 9258 total posts
Name:
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Re: How do you handle this?
I tell the kid to wait his/her turn, give DD a few minutes with the toy, and then tell DD it's time for the other child's turn.
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| Posted 6/16/10 8:17 PM |
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