Venting about drop off playdates

On Sunday we had a playdatevwith a boy from our building (he is 5 as same as DS). I met the dad before (I think he is a stay at home dad) but never the mom. She came and just drop her son off and just left her phone number "in case". My nephew (who is 9) was here and at one moment they were playing "rough" (pretending fighting) and I told them to stop because someone was going to get hurt. The other boy fell and that was the end of the game (he wasn't hurt -I guess- cause he didn't cry) so I proposed to build a train, legos, and they got entertained.

Today I ran into the dad and naively I asked if the boy had liked the playdate. He said no and started complaining that my nephew pushed him and he fell and that the kid never plays that way because he doesn't know about that (fighting), hasn't seen that not even on TV cause he doesn't watch TV.

I felt so bad! The mom just drop him off and when she picked him up didn't ask anything. All of them were playing roughly and when I asked them to stop all of them, including the boy, said to me that they were boys and that was the way they play.

I feel bad because now all the blame is on us (DH was here during the playdate)... when they left their child here without any recommendation, just a phone number, and I feel those things happen... Kids are going to get crazy playing (specially boys), they are going to fall at the school, playdates, playgrounds, home, etc. But I cant get away with this feeling that he took me by surprise with those comments when I thought the playdate went well. I cooked for them and played with them as well... I just feel as they say, no good deed goes unpunished

Lesson learned!

Thank you for letting me vent!

Re: Venting about drop off playdates

Posted by Adri

I just feel as they say, no good deed goes unpunished

Re: Venting about drop off playdates

That is ridiculous in my opinion... how about a thank you for having him over. It was so kind of you...and if he was really bothered by it , he could've mentioned it in a nicer way.

No way, should that guy be blaming you. It was not that big of a deal.

Re: Venting about drop off playdates

that is so ridiculous!

Re: Venting about drop off playdates

File that playdate under: Parents have no tact.

There are playdates that we've had over that haven't gone well & vice versa. We are just "busy" if they call back & then try them later on to see if they want another shot at it, matured, etc.

As for this kid never seeing roughhousing, total BS. Has he ever seen a movie? Even Disney movies have fighting. Has he been homeschooled his entire life? I get him not being a physical kid. Some kids aren't but tossing the blame out over one playdate is ridiculous.

Re: Venting about drop off playdates

Thank you! I feel so much better after reading all of your replies What bothers me right now is that it took me by surprise and now I think I should have answered differently. Well, maybe next time