BTDT moms of Preemies...could use a pick me up

Some of you may have seen my previous posts. My son was born at 31 weeks 1 day and is currently 3 weeks 2 days old and in the NICU at Winthrop. He was 3lbs 10ozs at birth and is currently 4lbs 7ozs. He's been getting stronger each day and even made it into a crib yesterday and is so far maintaining his temperature. He was being fed through a NG tube until 6 days ago when he started eating on his own. He's been eating great and the tube came out 5 days ago. This morning he didn't want to eat. He would latch on to the bottle but then start crying and refuse to eat. This happened at the 5 and 8AM feedings. They put the NG tube back in and I tried to feed him at 11AM but he refused and started crying. He just looks very sad today which is really getting to me. The doctors said not to worry and that this happens sometimes but I can't help but be upset I know that setbacks are expected but I hate seeing him frustrated and I hate that he's taken a step in the opposite direction and now this adds more time he will be in the NICU. I just want him home with me already (but obviously not until he's ready). I just was wondering if anyone has been in a similar situation. I could really use some words of encouragement

Re: BTDT moms of Preemies...could use a pick me up

I am so sorry you are going through this! I can't say my situation is the same but both of my twins were in the NICU and my DD seemed much stronger than DS. DS was going through something similar as your DS and when they had to put the NG tube back in I was devastated. I felt like DD would be home much sooner than DS and I would have to leave him there. Well just like that..DS took a turn for the better and was eating like a champ and they went home together. My point is (sorry for rambling) I was amazed how one day I thought he was never coming home and literally the next day or 2 they were telling me they were going home in a few days together

Hang in there! He will get there...4lbs 7 oz and in a regular crib is amazing!!! I bet he his home before you know it!

(my guys came home at that weight) so I am sure you are getting close!

Message edited 3/24/2011 2:00:48 PM.

Re: BTDT moms of Preemies...could use a pick me up

Im sorry I have no experience. But I am sending lots of prayers to your little peanut and hoping he gets home to you really soon

Re: BTDT moms of Preemies...could use a pick me up

Just wanted to send you hugs!! I hope he turns around and is home with you quickly

Re: BTDT moms of Preemies...could use a pick me up

Hang in there! It is not easy but know he is in good hands. I think it's great that he's already over 4 lbs (this was the weight DD was born at and left the hospital at). DD was born at 32 weeks and had to stay in the NICU for 2 weeks. I don't have any experience with NG tubes but as a PP mentioned, the progress they make from one day to the next sometimes is amazing. There may be a set back here and there but he will be home in no time!

Re: BTDT moms of Preemies...could use a pick me up

Posted by allIwant

I am so sorry you are going through this! I can't say my situation is the same but both of my twins were in the NICU and my DD seemed much stronger than DS. DS was going through something similar as your DS and when they had to put the NG tube back in I was devastated. I felt like DD would be home much sooner than DS and I would have to leave him there. Well just like that..DS took a turn for the better and was eating like a champ and they went home together. My point is (sorry for rambling) I was amazed how one day I thought he was never coming home and literally the next day or 2 they were telling me they were going home in a few days together

Hang in there! He will get there...4lbs 7 oz and in a regular crib is amazing!!! I bet he his home before you know it!

(my guys came home at that weight) so I am sure you are getting close!

Re: BTDT moms of Preemies...could use a pick me up

I don't have any experience with this but just wanted to give you a .

He is really strong and so are you, but you already know that. He will be home soon and while it's hard not to be upset, you already know it's for the best. I'm going to tell you to cry it out. It feels good. Let your emotions come in.

More hugs

Re: BTDT moms of Preemies...could use a pick me up

I have no advice but I hope your little peanut progresses and gets out of there asap!!

Re: BTDT moms of Preemies...could use a pick me up

I'm so sorry you are going through this. Hunter was in the NICU for only 5 days after I left the hospital, but it seemed like an eternity. I wish I could say something that would make things better for you. Praying he gets to come home soon!

Re: BTDT moms of Preemies...could use a pick me up

no problem!! if you need to vent more feel free to fm me!

Re: BTDT moms of Preemies...could use a pick me up

Having a baby in the NICU is SO HARD! DS was born at 31w 6d and weighed 3lbs 6oz. He was in the NICU for a month and came home at 4lbs 10oz. When he got weighed at the ped the next day, their scale said 4lbs 7oz! He was still tiny.

We became friendly with a few other parents in the NICU and it's so common for them to be doing so well one day and then have a setback. Every setback can potentially mean an extra day in the NICU, but not necessarily.

And the way I always looked at it was - I want him to be AS healthy as possible when he comes home so that he doesn't have to come back! I couldn't believe it when they told me he could actually go home; I asked them if they were SURE

I look back now (1 year later) and I can't believe he was really there for a month. As LONNNNNG as it seemed when he was in there, it feels like it FLEW by now.

They took wonderful care of DS in the NICU and I'm so happy for them. Your baby will be home soon and hopefully it will all be a memory soon!

Re: BTDT moms of Preemies...could use a pick me up

Re: BTDT moms of Preemies...could use a pick me up

No advice, but lots of

Re: BTDT moms of Preemies...could use a pick me up

It's so incredibly stressful and emotional to have a child in the NICU, and what's worse is that no one can fathom the feelings you go through unless they have been through it themselves. DS was born at 29 weeks 6 days and I remember the feeding milestone was a HUGE one and a long road before he mastered the bottle. It takes so much energy for them to eat from the bottle, and they get tired so easily. Also, their sucking reflex is so immature that it's difficult for them (and incredibly stressful for us) DS had the tube put back in a few times and it was heartbreaking. Try to focus on how far he has come and how strong he is getting. Also, the fact that he is maintaining his temperature in an open crib is HUGE! That's a testament to how strong he is getting. Before you know it he'll be home with you!!!!!

Re: BTDT moms of Preemies...could use a pick me up

Sending love and continued prayers to you and Ollie!

No experience and it may not be at all related, but there are days when DD would hardly eat and fought the bottle/breast when she was around that age too (obviously not adjusted since she was full term). I'm so glad he's getting such great care! He will be home with you so soon, and every day he's there he gets stronger and stronger!

Re: BTDT moms of Preemies...could use a pick me up

My kids were all in NICU and my younger DS had feeding issues. 2 times they had to put the NG tube back in b/c he wasn't eating. he would just sit there with the botlte in his mouth looking at me. i would beg and plead with him to please drink. i remember crying b/c i desperately wanted hi to drink his 15cc one day and he just wouldn't. before i started feeding him the nurse had told me that if he didn't eat that feeding they were putting the NG tube back. so when i was done trying i gave him to her to try and get him to drink it and he wouldn't....so he had the NG tube again.
Then all of a sudden.....he picked up his intake and never looked back. Hope your DS is doing better soon!!!

Re: BTDT moms of Preemies...could use a pick me up

i was in your shoes 8 months ago when DS was born at 32w6d but he was 5lbs 3.6oz. He had the NG tube also & it was so troubling to see him with that. When we first started to feed him the bottle, he really did not want anything to do with it & I would go home so upset bc all I wanted was for him to eat from the bottle so he could come home. Once he got the swing of things, there were days where he did not eat as much as he was suppose to & they would tell us that NG tube would need to go back in. Then he would rebound the next day & we would make steps forward.

All I can tell you is to keep your head up. It is a long road for them & like the Dr's use to tell me, just remember, this is TOTALLY normal for them to take 2 steps up & one step back bc they "technically" should not be in the world right now. They should still be floating away, nice & warm in mommy's belly! When the time is right, he will get the hang of it & you won't look back!

Re: BTDT moms of Preemies...could use a pick me up

my heart hurts for you as a mom even though i have no experience in this area.

Sounds like he is doing great with gaining weight so i am sure he is just having an off day. Stay strong and take care.A million hugs to you and him

Message edited 3/24/2011 4:21:23 PM.

Re: BTDT moms of Preemies...could use a pick me up

Hang in there! The rollercoaster ride of a NICU stay is so hard! Preemies dont go by the book so you never know what they are going to do! My son was born 31weeks 6days and was 2lbs 9 oz. We were in for 73 days. He had a hard time with eating too but it got better! We also dealt with oxygen and breathing problems. I used to just sit and cry wondering if he was ever coming home. Now he is my brilliant 4 year old. He is an amazing miracle that I cant even believe how rough he had it in the beginning. You obth will get through this. It will be easy for a few days and then it hits you again. It is a cycle.
FM me if you want to chat. I spent a lot of time in Winthrop!
Kelly

Re: BTDT moms of Preemies...could use a pick me up

I don't have any BTDT advice but I just wanted to send hugs and prayers that your LO is home soon!

Re: BTDT moms of Preemies...could use a pick me up

Everyone has given you great advice.

You know all babies have bad days and unfortunately with your little one a bad day is just bad. Give him lots of skin to skin cuddling time he may just need extra mommy love!

Re: BTDT moms of Preemies...could use a pick me up

Just wanted to send you a ton of hugs!!!

Re: BTDT moms of Preemies...could use a pick me up

First let me celebrate the progress your DS has made, that is great weight gain for 3 weeks.

As a BTDT preemie mom to 2 DD's (a 32 weeker and a 28 weeker), my first bit of advice to NICU moms is a forwarning the the rollercoaster of the NICU. When DD #1 was in the NICU every day felt like an eternity and I so vividly recall the longing/desperation I had in my heart to have her home, mind you she was only there for 16 days. I will say that I also had great fear when she did come home because she was so tiny and I was a new mother. The days in the NICU really allows them to get stronger and for us to develop knowledge and preparedness to parent a preemie which is somewhat different than parenting a 40 weeker.

With DD # 2 who was a 28 weeker and in the NICU for 46 days the journey had many more peaks and valleys (breathing issues, temperture holding, eating issues, etc.) but taking her home was so sweet. It is very hard to see babies coming and going in the NICU while our little ones stay, but I promise you this that one day it will be your DS who is ready to leave the NICU. So I say stay strong and hang in there, before you know it he will be home!!


I would also like to know if the suspect reflux? Preemies have a higher rate of reflux due to their under developed digestive systems.

Please feel free to FM.

Re: BTDT moms of Preemies...could use a pick me up

First of all, they are in a GREAT hospital. The NICU nurses and Drs at Winthrop were great with my Twins. They were both there for exactly 30 days. The eating milestone was huge! DS would eat well for a few days and then not so well others. But one day it just clicked and he started downing his bottles so quickly. He was all set to come home christmas eve, then he had a DSAT that morning. DD didn't start taking bottles until much later than DS. When DS had his DSAt is when DD must have been like, oh sh!t, I need to catch up. Then she started sucking them down. With DD we had a problem with Bradys and apnea. They would stop for 4 days and on that 5th day, she would have a brady. Well, they both wound up coming home on NYE and now they are doing great! It is definitely scary in the NICU. We saw a lot of stuff there that freaked us out, but the nurses and doctors were incredible. Your DS is in great hands

Re: BTDT moms of Preemies...could use a pick me up

The nicu days are so frustrating. I remember telling the nurses that I want to drink the bottle for her. Amelia was the same way, then one day it just clicked. He needs to learn how to suck, swallow and breathe and that normally doesn't happen until 34 weeks. What got me through, was that the nurses kept telling me "she's not supposed to be doing this yet.". That helped me maintain on the really bad days. Hang in there. And his weight is great.