Friend had a baby...

So a college friend had a baby last week. Not that I saw them often, but I still have the feeling like "Oh, congrats, it was nice knowing you."

Half of me is sad because this means that we're now further apart in our lives. The other half of me projects MY feelings about children on the situation and feels bad for them.

Don't know why I'm posting here, I guess just to get it out.

*steps into flame retardant suit*

Re: Friend had a baby...

Awww. yea I feel the same way too. Mixed emotions - a little sad because now most of my friends' attention will focus on the baby and I can no longer feel comfortable just calling that friend at 10 pm on a Friday night to see if she wants to grab a drink or hang out..
Yet, happy because that friend is excited about this new stage of her life..

So you aren't alone!! At my age (mid 30s), more of my friends are in the Parent category than the CF category, so I usually tell them I wouldn't mind baby-sitting their babies every so often as long as its only for a few hours or a day.. I think its so much more fun and easier to play with babies and fuss over them when they AREN'T your own kids, because when they start to cry, poop, create disasters, etc, thats when I pick it up and give it right back to Mom!!! Its so nice to come home and feel complete FREEDOM in knowing your life isn't as crazy as those of your parent friends...

Re: Friend had a baby...

I know exactly what you are saying....

I am very happy that they have a baby but I know that our relationship will never be the same again.

We had a couple that we would have dinner with and hang out with, she got pregnant and we didnt hear from them for 4 months...ok...guess they wanted to wait to tell anyone. So then she has the baby and I have try 4 times now to see the baby,,,she is now 3 months old...and its always something.

So I guess I got the hint now...

Re: Friend had a baby...

I think a bunch of us mid 30ers are in a similar situation. I rarely see my bff who popped out 2. My cf bff moved out of state. Most other friends are bogged down in diapers and soccer.

Its a good place to vent about it, we feel you.

Edited for sp

Message edited 9/12/2011 10:34:54 PM.

Re: Friend had a baby...

I'm sorry you're sad...I hope things stay cool between you and your friend.

Re: Friend had a baby...

well if you HAD to post that thread... you certainly picked the right board for it!!

Im sure you are not the only one that feels that way! i know i do... everytime i hear that a friend is prego or just had a baby.. i always think to myself:

1. "*** is wrong with you!!!??"
2. "OMG im so sorry"
3. "Think they will keep it"
4. "Well... there goes another friend ill never see again"

im sure i could list more...

Re: Friend had a baby...

Message edited 9/13/2011 11:41:34 AM.

Re: Friend had a baby...

I'm in my late 30s and my friends who have kids are on their 2nd or 3rd. I'm not included in most of their gatherings (unless gifts are involved then I ALWAYS get an invite ).

They all disappear for long periods of time as they immerse themselves in all things kids. I come from a huge family and I remember talking with my mom about this after I was given the cut from a friend I had had since junior high. I remember my parents having couples nights, dinner parties, etc-- and we were left with the babysitter. No kids nights, you know? And my mom said that she feels that in those days, kids fit into the adults life. The adults didn't revolve around the kids.

I still invite them over for different dinner parties, "ladies who lunch" lunches, hell I even tried doing a book club. But, alas, my social group is mostly CFers or older couples who have older kids (over 16 years old).

Re: Friend had a baby...