Need advice..sensitive issue

I was going to post in hiding on parenting. I decided to post here instead. Please do NOT flame me, if you have no advice or guidance, then go away, dont respond. Thanks.

Ok, you all are pet lovers. so am I , i love my pitbull like a child. She was here before my kids and I love her to pieces.

Heres my issue:

My 3 year old is very rough. Like WWE rough. he hits her and used to bite her, we nipped that fast. He loves to lay on her and just play with her. He says shes his best friend. and his sister. she always takes a beating from him.if shes had enough she will snarl and walk away. Lately though shes been nipping at him. like open mouthed but not biting down. I know she knows not to. she knows when shes bad bc she goes into her crate after and cowls.

how do i prevent this from being a full on attack? I hardly EVER leave them alone in a room. When a babysitter is here, she is left in the crate or my bedroom. i love her too much to get rid of her bc what might happen, i really can not afford a trainer. Please help!

Re: Need advice..sensitive issue

This is a good question. Is she nipping at him when he provokes her or for no reason at all? I think you have every right to be concerned and to ask these questions.

I know you love your dog but you are being very smart to be proactive.

I have to say that I think the first and foremost thing you need to do is make sure your child does not hurt her. She is responding to that I assume based on your post. But is that possible? Does your DS listen and understand?

KWIM? Your DC sees you put her in a crate but really if he is provoking her, shouldn't he be the one being reprimanded, put in a time out, kwim? Maybe he enjoys seeing you crate the dog, punish the dog, when it's his fault? Maybe if you put him in time out, take toys away from him and not "appear" to reprimand the dog he will change his behavior? B/c it seems that is the root of this problem.

Like if my DD hurts our dog, I reprimand her, even if my dog nipped at her. I know it wasn't my dog's fault and it was my DCs fault. However, I have a small dog that could not seriously harm my DC to the extent that a large dog like a pitbull could so that is where I speak from.

Message edited 8/16/2012 5:55:18 PM.

Re: Need advice..sensitive issue

This is difficult because I have cats that cause a lot less damage than a pitbull could potentially cause. For me, I have repeatedly had to tell DS, "If you are not nice to the cats then they will not be nice to you." My cats are very tolerant of DS but they too can reach their limit especially when they are backed in a corner. They usually will give a warning hiss when they have had enough which is when I reprimand DS to leave them alone. I feel it is my job to show DS the proper way to treat our pets. This applies to the way he plays with them. He can get overly "jubilant" with the wand toys and tends to hit them with it. I try to take his hand and show him the right way. If he hits them again, I take the toy away and tell him when he learns the proper way to use the toy he can play again.

I think for you this would be the best tactic. I would not allow your DS to play that rough with the dog under any circumstances. I would tell him that the dog is not a pillow and not to lay on her. I would reprimand your son and remove him from the dog. I would show him the right ways to play with her. I would tell him that he is hurting her and that since she is his best friend he shouldnt want to do something that could hurt her. I would treat his rough behavior as sternly as if he was hitting a person. HTHs

Message edited 8/16/2012 10:50:42 PM.

Need advice..sensitive issue

The best way to handle this is to address your DS behavior. At three years old he should be able to understand that hitting and jumping on the dog hurts her. Your dog is telling your DS (and you) that his behavior is upsetting her by how she is reacting. I agree with the pp's-I would explain to your son that he needs to be gentle to the dog. If he starts to play rough remove him from the dog. I would praise your son and your dog when they are playing nicely. Reinforcing the positive behavior is the best way to train your dog. There are several wonderful books about dog behavior by Patricia McConnell that may be helpful:
http://www.patriciamcconnell.com

Re: Need advice..sensitive issue

Re: Need advice..sensitive issue

I agree with what has been said, except that my thought is your DS thinks he IS being nice because he loves her and she is his best friend. I want to think he truly doesn't realize that he is playing 'rough'. I would talk to him about what playing nicely with everyone, including the dog, looks like, and to remember 'gentle' whenever he is with the dog. I had dogs growing up and gentle was a buzz word in our house. When I walk Ozzie and we stop for kids to pet him, I'm always so grateful and impressed by the parents who remind their little ones to touch gently.

IMO the dog really isn't doing anything wrong or inappropriate, and your DS just needs to learn to play gently. Also, if anyone else in your house plays rough with the dog (an adult who does it occasionally for fun) it could be rubbing off on your DS. I would suggest working to change the culture in the house to one of 'gentle' with the dog at all times. Model the behavior to your DS, show him how you want him to interact with the dog. He loves the dog, so I think this CAN get better!

Good luck!