If your 7yo takes music lessons

Do you make them practice? Do they listen? I pay for 1/2 guitar lesson for my DD in home. I don't have the energy to be tiger mom lol and make her practice. She does well during the lesson and asked learn she is just not into practicing at all. I keep threatening that she can't have the lesson if she doesn't practice 2x a week for 15 min. Would you keep her in the lessons?

Re: If your 7yo takes music lessons

My DS is 5.5 and takes piano 1X per week. He practices pretty much every day for 15 min. I don't force him - he wants to do it - sometimes I do have to "remind" him or push him to get him started but, he is happy once he starts. Honestly, you can't truly excel at an instrument with just the 1X per week lesson - I told him from the getgo - if he doesn't practice then no more lessons. The lessons were his idea so if he doesn't want to continue doing it we won't. But, I'm not paying for lessons if he isn't practicing.

Message edited 4/11/2013 8:07:55 PM.

Re: If your 7yo takes music lessons

My DD is 7 and takes piano lessons. With all due respect, I don't see the point of taking music lessons without practicing. So no, if she refused to practice, she'd be done. My DD practices for 20 minutes (at least) EVERY day. I don't think there's anything Tiger Mom about that. It's the same thing--in my opinion--as refusing to do your homework and nobody would tolerate that.

Re: If your 7yo takes music lessons

Thanks the only reason I said Tiger mom is because I am after her for homework and other activities. Maybe it's just too much. Or maybe I'm not strict enough to make her practice. We are not home until after 530 on weekdays and they are with their dad every other weekend so maybe it's too much for her and she is not ready until she is into it. Problem is she is 7 and is not "into" anything yet.

Re: If your 7yo takes music lessons

Re: If your 7yo takes music lessons

My son took guitar. His teacher told me he MUST. Practice every single day. My son didnt want to. So i stopped the lessons. It was as simple as that. If he wasnt going to put in the work, i wasnt going to force him and waste the teachers time and my money.

Re: If your 7yo takes music lessons

I'm looking for a music school now for my 5 yo. He has to play an instrument, whatever he chooses. So I would force him to practice. I took lessons when young, and my parents didn't force me to practice. I was not interested in anything, I don't want my kids to be like that

Maybe you can show her some YouTube videos of kids her age playing piano or which ever instrument she wants to play?

Message edited 4/12/2013 10:06:41 AM.

Re: If your 7yo takes music lessons

My kids both took music lessons when they were younger.

Noah never wanted to practice. I stopped the lessons immediately and that was the end of it. He's 9 now. He declined the invitation to play a string instrument this year and will likely not opt to take a band instrument next year. I'm fine with that.

Robbie did his 'duty' and practiced 30 minutes a day when he was younger. He opted to pick up tenor sax in school. He practices a minimum of 30 minutes a day 4x a week. Sometimes I have to push him - but most of the time he's eager and will practice for longer.

I guess I'm super laid back about this. I know having an instrument is a benefit for college.. but I feel like I'd rather focus on finding things tht he enjoys doing and helping him excel there.

Message edited 4/12/2013 10:19:41 AM.

Re: If your 7yo takes music lessons

Posted by rojerono

My kids both took music lessons when they were younger.

Noah never wanted to practice. I stopped the lessons immediately and that was the end of it. He's 9 now. He declined the invitation to play a string instrument this year and will likely not opt to take a band instrument next year. I'm fine with that.

Robbie did his 'duty' and practiced 30 minutes a day when he was younger. He opted to pick up tenor sax in school. He practices a minimum of 30 minutes a day 4x a week. Sometimes I have to push him - but most of the time he's eager and will practice for longer.

I guess I'm super laid back about this. I know having an instrument is a benefit for college.. but I feel like I'd rather focus on finding things tht he enjoys doing and helping him excel there.

Re: If your 7yo takes music lessons

Posted by stinger

Posted by rojerono

My kids both took music lessons when they were younger.

Noah never wanted to practice. I stopped the lessons immediately and that was the end of it. He's 9 now. He declined the invitation to play a string instrument this year and will likely not opt to take a band instrument next year. I'm fine with that.

Robbie did his 'duty' and practiced 30 minutes a day when he was younger. He opted to pick up tenor sax in school. He practices a minimum of 30 minutes a day 4x a week. Sometimes I have to push him - but most of the time he's eager and will practice for longer.

I guess I'm super laid back about this. I know having an instrument is a benefit for college.. but I feel like I'd rather focus on finding things tht he enjoys doing and helping him excel there.

Thats the thing. She says she likes the guitar and wants to learn. Also how does your son have 30 min a day especially on weekdays to practice? Is he home right after school?

Message edited 4/12/2013 2:24:16 PM.

Re: If your 7yo takes music lessons

DD is on her second year of piano lessons. I started her in a group class thinking she may be more interested if she saw other kids doing it, starting last summer we have someone come to the house.

I have a play-each-song-assigned-3-times rule every day and so far it has worked like a charm. It's become habit now, just like brushing teeth, it's something we automatically do (usually right after dinner and before getting ready for bed) so it's not really questioned...

DD has her lessons on Thursdays. She doesn't have to practice on lesson days and sometimes Fridays get skipped. I usually sit with her Fri/Sat/Sun for a bit to help her with whatever she may be struggling with. Then Mon/Tues/Wed she is on her own while I help get her little sis ready for bed.

I think the key is to find the right balance of what and how to practice. If the kiddos are too overwhelmed they may feel the need to just give up. Although I could never teach my kiddo, I think in our case it helps that I have a music background as well...

Re: If your 7yo takes music lessons

Posted by rojerono

Posted by stinger

Posted by rojerono

My kids both took music lessons when they were younger.

Noah never wanted to practice. I stopped the lessons immediately and that was the end of it. He's 9 now. He declined the invitation to play a string instrument this year and will likely not opt to take a band instrument next year. I'm fine with that.

Robbie did his 'duty' and practiced 30 minutes a day when he was younger. He opted to pick up tenor sax in school. He practices a minimum of 30 minutes a day 4x a week. Sometimes I have to push him - but most of the time he's eager and will practice for longer.

I guess I'm super laid back about this. I know having an instrument is a benefit for college.. but I feel like I'd rather focus on finding things tht he enjoys doing and helping him excel there.

Thats the thing. She says she likes the guitar and wants to learn. Also how does your son have 30 min a day especially on weekdays to practice? Is he home right after school?

I guess I'm a lazy mom because my kids have A LOT of down time.

Robbie gets home by 3. He does his homework, finishes his chores, does 30 minutes of physical activity minimum, 30 minutes of educational activity minimum (this can be his sax practice if he chooses) and then his time is his own to watch tv, play video games or whatever else he wants to do. He has to break for supper and goes to bed at 9. He’s usually done by 6pm – around the time I’m putting dinner on the table – so he’s got after dinner to bedtime to do whatever he wants. On weekends the requirement is upped to 60 minutes each of physical and educational and he can break that up however he chooses. Baseball practice is usually 1-2x a week and he has 1 game during the week and 1 game on the weekend each week – those count as physical activities.

Homework, chores, education and physical are required and have to be done before they even think about free time. I’m pretty flexible though.. if we are going hiking or biking as a family that will be their physical activity.. If we watch a documentary or if they have a project BEYOND normal homework (like science fair project) I will allow them to consider work on that toward their education requirement.

I dunno... neither of them ever seem to have trouble finding time to hang out with their friends or play games.

ETA: At 7 I think your DD is old enough to understand the consequences of action or inaction. I'd let her know that if she enjoys guitar and wants to continue lessons she MUST practice. Maybe you can make a game of it? Like .. put up a chart and mark the days where she will have to practice. If she practices she gets a star. If she doesn't practice or refuses.. she gets and X. If she gets whatever number of X's.. she loses the privilege of having guitar lessons.

Re: If your 7yo takes music lessons

Posted by stinger

Posted by rojerono

Posted by stinger

Posted by rojerono

My kids both took music lessons when they were younger.

Noah never wanted to practice. I stopped the lessons immediately and that was the end of it. He's 9 now. He declined the invitation to play a string instrument this year and will likely not opt to take a band instrument next year. I'm fine with that.

Robbie did his 'duty' and practiced 30 minutes a day when he was younger. He opted to pick up tenor sax in school. He practices a minimum of 30 minutes a day 4x a week. Sometimes I have to push him - but most of the time he's eager and will practice for longer.

I guess I'm super laid back about this. I know having an instrument is a benefit for college.. but I feel like I'd rather focus on finding things tht he enjoys doing and helping him excel there.

Thats the thing. She says she likes the guitar and wants to learn. Also how does your son have 30 min a day especially on weekdays to practice? Is he home right after school?

I guess I'm a lazy mom because my kids have A LOT of down time.

Robbie gets home by 3. He does his homework, finishes his chores, does 30 minutes of physical activity minimum, 30 minutes of educational activity minimum (this can be his sax practice if he chooses) and then his time is his own to watch tv, play video games or whatever else he wants to do. He has to break for supper and goes to bed at 9. He’s usually done by 6pm – around the time I’m putting dinner on the table – so he’s got after dinner to bedtime to do whatever he wants. On weekends the requirement is upped to 60 minutes each of physical and educational and he can break that up however he chooses. Baseball practice is usually 1-2x a week and he has 1 game during the week and 1 game on the weekend each week – those count as physical activities.

Homework, chores, education and physical are required and have to be done before they even think about free time. I’m pretty flexible though.. if we are going hiking or biking as a family that will be their physical activity.. If we watch a documentary or if they have a project BEYOND normal homework (like science fair project) I will allow them to consider work on that toward their education requirement.

I dunno... neither of them ever seem to have trouble finding time to hang out with their friends or play games.

ETA: At 7 I think your DD is old enough to understand the consequences of action or inaction. I'd let her know that if she enjoys guitar and wants to continue lessons she MUST practice. Maybe you can make a game of it? Like .. put up a chart and mark the days where she will have to practice. If she practices she gets a star. If she doesn't practice or refuses.. she gets and X. If she gets whatever number of X's.. she loses the privilege of having guitar lessons.

Thanks I will try that maybe. There is a big difference here for working parents and their kids that don't get home til 530 or 6 pm compared to those that are home by 3. My DD is getting ready for bed at 8 pm. We don't have screen time MON to THUR at all. So there should be enough time for guitar practice even 20 min. But Between down time, dinner and a shower the time diaappears.

Re: If your 7yo takes music lessons

Posted by rojerono

Posted by stinger

Posted by rojerono

Posted by stinger

Posted by rojerono

My kids both took music lessons when they were younger.

Noah never wanted to practice. I stopped the lessons immediately and that was the end of it. He's 9 now. He declined the invitation to play a string instrument this year and will likely not opt to take a band instrument next year. I'm fine with that.

Robbie did his 'duty' and practiced 30 minutes a day when he was younger. He opted to pick up tenor sax in school. He practices a minimum of 30 minutes a day 4x a week. Sometimes I have to push him - but most of the time he's eager and will practice for longer.

I guess I'm super laid back about this. I know having an instrument is a benefit for college.. but I feel like I'd rather focus on finding things tht he enjoys doing and helping him excel there.

Thats the thing. She says she likes the guitar and wants to learn. Also how does your son have 30 min a day especially on weekdays to practice? Is he home right after school?

I guess I'm a lazy mom because my kids have A LOT of down time.

Robbie gets home by 3. He does his homework, finishes his chores, does 30 minutes of physical activity minimum, 30 minutes of educational activity minimum (this can be his sax practice if he chooses) and then his time is his own to watch tv, play video games or whatever else he wants to do. He has to break for supper and goes to bed at 9. He’s usually done by 6pm – around the time I’m putting dinner on the table – so he’s got after dinner to bedtime to do whatever he wants. On weekends the requirement is upped to 60 minutes each of physical and educational and he can break that up however he chooses. Baseball practice is usually 1-2x a week and he has 1 game during the week and 1 game on the weekend each week – those count as physical activities.

Homework, chores, education and physical are required and have to be done before they even think about free time. I’m pretty flexible though.. if we are going hiking or biking as a family that will be their physical activity.. If we watch a documentary or if they have a project BEYOND normal homework (like science fair project) I will allow them to consider work on that toward their education requirement.

I dunno... neither of them ever seem to have trouble finding time to hang out with their friends or play games.

ETA: At 7 I think your DD is old enough to understand the consequences of action or inaction. I'd let her know that if she enjoys guitar and wants to continue lessons she MUST practice. Maybe you can make a game of it? Like .. put up a chart and mark the days where she will have to practice. If she practices she gets a star. If she doesn't practice or refuses.. she gets and X. If she gets whatever number of X's.. she loses the privilege of having guitar lessons.

Thanks I will try that maybe. There is a big difference here for working parents and their kids that don't get home til 530 or 6 pm compared to those that are home by 3. My DD is getting ready for bed at 8 pm. We don't have screen time MON to THUR at all. So there should be enough time for guitar practice even 20 min. But Between down time, dinner and a shower the time diaappears.

I'm a working mom too. But my husband is currently unemployed. I might have to adjust a bit once he goes back to work! Who is her caregiver? Maybe he/she can monitor the guitar lessons? Maybe you can take the downtime while she does her practice?

Re: If your 7yo takes music lessons

instead of x number of minutes, one thing you could try just to get into the swing of things is to have the assigned material play x number of times. depending on how much is assigned, this number of times could be once or twice to start small...

i don't have a time requirement for DD, sometimes she'll sit down for what seems like forever to get through her required 3 times each, other times she breezes through it. if she is struggling too much in the beginning i step in. i would try to work with the teacher to see how this approach could work.

personally i think it's more important to establish a routine of every day, every other day, 3 times a week, whatever vs. sitting down for a set number of minutes. for us, practicing this way has increased DD's confidence and has avoided major conflicts (she does complain here and there, but not for long)...