Anyone else ever feel

Like they are reliving their MC every time AF shows her ugly roaring head??? Got mine today and while I had a feeling this wasn't my month, I cannot stop crying today. I just feel like I'm reliving the whole mc experience... It sounds so stupid, especially since I've really just begun my TTC journey but I can't help but feel terrified that I'm never going to see that BFP again. I know it's terrible to even think that way, especially this early, but it's what's running through my mind.

I have no friends I can turn to with this, none of my friends are even married, except ones that live hours away and one of which I just found out (through someone else) is pregnant (she knows what happened with the MC and hasn't told me yet, I'm assuming out of respect for me). I can't talk to DH right now about this, he's got a ton of stuff going on work-wise (he flew out to Wisconsin today for a third - and hopefully final- interview for a HUGE job opportunity).

Thanks all for listening/reading. Just really needed to vent!

Re: Anyone else ever feel

I know how you feel. It can be so overwhelming. CD1 has been a nightmare for me for about 2 years now. After our loss in January, it's been worse than ever.

BUT
After the sadness of another cycle lost, for me, it becomes a new opportunity. So feel bad. It's ok. You went through something very hard and it's a constant reminder every time you get AF. Just remember its a fresh start as well

Re: Anyone else ever feel

I know exactly how you feel and could've written this post myself last year. Having our miscarriage was one of the most devastating things that ever happened to me. I've never felt sadder in my life. I got the green light to try again last January and from then on every time I got AF it was another reminder of what i didn't have. I would cry for several days and then be angry, and then be excited for a new cycle. It was a vicious cycle and I thought I'd never see those two lines again either. Then last Sept AF didn't show up and we FINALLY got our BFP. I didn't believe it. But now I'm a mommy to a beautiful 6 week old DD. Hang in there! Going through a miscarriage is hard and just know that your feelings are normal. You will get that BFP,again!