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bunnyluck
LIF Adult
Member since 1/14 3196 total posts
Name:
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Baby Shower - is it rude not to invite...
Is it rude if I do not invite my husband's good friend's wives / gfs to my shower? Even if I was invited to some of theirs? It would be about 8 people.
I really, really want to keep it small and intimate. Close friends and close family only.
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Posted 10/20/14 2:20 PM  |
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jessnbrian
Only God knows His plan for us
Member since 4/13 7238 total posts
Name:
Jessica
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Baby Shower - is it rude not to invite...
I had a rule that if I was invited to their showers, I invited them to mine... I, personally, would find it rude if I had invited someone to my shower and I found out that I wasn't invited to theirs. For me, this amounted to 3 girls, all of whom I'm very friendly with (I don't get together alone with them)... I've also known them for well over a decade.
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| Posted 10/20/14 2:30 PM |
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FTM427
LIF Adult
Member since 1/12 1261 total posts
Name:
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Baby Shower - is it rude not to invite...
I think its fine, as long as its the whole group that is not invited and not just a few from the group. But maybe if you see them and the topic comes up just let them know that "so and so is throwing the shower for you and that its going to be very small". I wouldn't be offended if that were the case. I get annoyed when its the other way around and people invite everyone they know...for ex. recently I was invited to a baby shower for DH 2nd cousins "baby mama" who I vaguely remember meeting one time at a wedding several years ago. In those cases I feel like the person is just trying to get more presents.
Message edited 10/20/2014 2:37:41 PM.
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| Posted 10/20/14 2:36 PM |
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MrsT809
LIF Adult
Member since 9/09 12167 total posts
Name:
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Baby Shower - is it rude not to invite...
I would lean toward inviting them if you were invited to theirs already. 8 people isn't too many considering most likely not all of them will come. As long as it's not imposing too much on your hosts I would include them.
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| Posted 10/20/14 2:39 PM |
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bunnyluck
LIF Adult
Member since 1/14 3196 total posts
Name:
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Baby Shower - is it rude not to invite...
I know, I am leaning towards just inviting them. It's the right thing to do.
My mom just isn't having the the best time financially right now so I really wanted to keep it as small as possible...We have a pretty big immediate family so I am trying to cut back where I can.
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| Posted 10/20/14 3:06 PM |
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MrsM84
LIF Adult
Member since 2/13 2352 total posts
Name:
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Baby Shower - is it rude not to invite...
I do think it is rude to not invite someone to your shower if you were invited to theirs. 8 people is not that many, and there is no definite that they will even attend. If you are concerned financially for these extra 8, you could always offer to cover the cost so your mom doesn't have to. I think its the right thing to do.
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| Posted 10/20/14 3:10 PM |
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JME78
LIF Adult
Member since 11/09 3672 total posts
Name:
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Re: Baby Shower - is it rude not to invite...
Its not rude.
If you want a smaller shower with people that you are closer to, there is absolutely nothing wrong with that.
I would never get offended over not being invited to a baby shower.
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| Posted 10/20/14 3:17 PM |
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MrsRapz
mahna mahna!
Member since 2/12 1952 total posts
Name:
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Baby Shower - is it rude not to invite...
I don't think it's rude ... but it depends how close you are with them.
Honestly, they might even be happy to not be invited
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| Posted 10/20/14 3:28 PM |
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NYCGirl80
I love my kiddies!
Member since 5/11 10413 total posts
Name:
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Re: Baby Shower - is it rude not to invite...
Posted by bunnyluck
I know, I am leaning towards just inviting them. It's the right thing to do.
My mom just isn't having the the best time financially right now so I really wanted to keep it as small as possible...We have a pretty big immediate family so I am trying to cut back where I can.
If you were invited to theirs, I would invite them. However, if there really is a financial hardship, then I think it's fine not to invite them. Is there any way they'd even find out you had a shower? Doesn't sound like you're super close to them anyway. If they will find out, I might explain the situation to them so there's no hard feelings.
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| Posted 10/20/14 3:40 PM |
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bunnyluck
LIF Adult
Member since 1/14 3196 total posts
Name:
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Baby Shower - is it rude not to invite...
It's not so much the money but the fact that I am just not close to them at all!
I don't even get why I was invited to theirs. I think just out of obligation because our husbands are close and they all had BIG showers (70+). I really want something low key.
But I guess I will just invite them. I feel like it is the right thing to do.
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| Posted 10/20/14 3:58 PM |
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mrsb1
LIF Toddler
Member since 2/10 423 total posts
Name:
las1 from LIW
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Baby Shower - is it rude not to invite...
If I was invited to theirs then yes I would invite them.
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| Posted 10/20/14 4:12 PM |
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jessnbrian
Only God knows His plan for us
Member since 4/13 7238 total posts
Name:
Jessica
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Re: Baby Shower - is it rude not to invite...
Posted by NYCGirl80
Posted by bunnyluck
I know, I am leaning towards just inviting them. It's the right thing to do.
My mom just isn't having the the best time financially right now so I really wanted to keep it as small as possible...We have a pretty big immediate family so I am trying to cut back where I can.
If you were invited to theirs, I would invite them. However, if there really is a financial hardship, then I think it's fine not to invite them. Is there any way they'd even find out you had a shower? Doesn't sound like you're super close to them anyway. If they will find out, I might explain the situation to them so there's no hard feelings.
I agree with this under the circumstances.
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| Posted 10/20/14 4:13 PM |
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jessnbrian
Only God knows His plan for us
Member since 4/13 7238 total posts
Name:
Jessica
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Re: Baby Shower - is it rude not to invite...
Posted by bunnyluck
It's not so much the money but the fact that I am just not close to them at all!
I don't even get why I was invited to theirs. I think just out of obligation because our husbands are close and they all had BIG showers (70+). I really want something low key.
But I guess I will just invite them. I feel like it is the right thing to do.
FWIW, I invited the girls that invited me, and they didn't come to my shower. I only invited a total of 30 people, including these girls and my family who's house it was at.
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| Posted 10/20/14 4:15 PM |
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Naner325
waiting on nugget!
Member since 6/10 4432 total posts
Name:
N
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Re: Baby Shower - is it rude not to invite...
I don't think it's rude. I was invited to one of DH's friends wives bridal showers but I don't plan on inviting her to my baby shower. Not because I don't like her but because if I invite one, I would feel like I have to invite them all and honestly, I enjoy their company when we do see each other, but it's the only time I speak with them. I say, do what you are comfortable with and like a PP said, some might even be grateful not to be invited.
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| Posted 10/20/14 5:08 PM |
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Mrs213
????????
Member since 2/09 18986 total posts
Name:
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Baby Shower - is it rude not to invite...
I think its rude, I would invite whoever invited me to theirs
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| Posted 10/20/14 5:39 PM |
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Katareen
5,000 Posts!
Member since 4/10 7180 total posts
Name:
Katherine
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Baby Shower - is it rude not to invite...
Not rude--some people invite 100 people to their shower and its ridiculous. If you're not close to them, no need to invite them.
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| Posted 10/20/14 5:56 PM |
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IVFmiracle
Complete
Member since 12/12 4088 total posts
Name:
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Re: Baby Shower - is it rude not to invite...
Not rude as long as you don't invite any.
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| Posted 10/21/14 8:48 PM |
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Kitten1929
LIF Adult
Member since 1/13 6040 total posts
Name:
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Re: Baby Shower - is it rude not to invite...
If I was not invited to one of DH's close friends wives showers (especially because I am good friends with them in my own right) I would feel very, very slighted.
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| Posted 10/21/14 10:30 PM |
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bunnyluck
LIF Adult
Member since 1/14 3196 total posts
Name:
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Re: Baby Shower - is it rude not to invite...
Posted by Kitten1929
If I was not invited to one of DH's close friends wives showers (especially because I am good friends with them in my own right) I would feel very, very slighted.
I really have no real relationship with them except for an occasional Facebook "like." See them maybe three times a year at like friend's weddings, christenings, birthday, etc. We don't call or text or get together.
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| Posted 10/21/14 10:57 PM |
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OhBoyorGirl
LIF Adult
Member since 2/12 1789 total posts
Name:
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Re: Baby Shower - is it rude not to invite...
If your only real connection to them is that they're married to your DH's friends, I wouldn't even think twice about not inviting them. Some people have huge showers and invite acquaintances, some keep it small and close knit- nothing wrong with that at all. I don't think you need to reciprocate an invitation, everyone's circumstances are different.
Message edited 10/21/2014 11:05:40 PM.
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| Posted 10/21/14 11:04 PM |
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ali120206
2 Boys
Member since 7/06 17792 total posts
Name:
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Baby Shower - is it rude not to invite...
I didn't invite them to my shower and I was not invited to theirs.
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| Posted 10/22/14 10:06 AM |
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JDubs
different, not less
Member since 7/09 13160 total posts
Name:
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Re: Baby Shower - is it rude not to invite...
I wouldn't invite them if its going to be a financial hardship.
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| Posted 10/22/14 12:03 PM |
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