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hoping2013
LIF Toddler
Member since 1/13 435 total posts
Name:
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A poem that I wrote...
Hi all, I haven't been on here as I have been dealing with my final loss and the end of this fertility journey. I wrote this poem and wanted to share it with someone....I think you guys of all people will understand it, while others might not. Thanks for reading xo
Dear One
There is an emptiness deep inside that I am afraid I will fall into
Filled with all my hopes and dreams for a lifetime with you
My little child, born of me, through me, into our lives
But instead, you were repeatedly pulled from my side
I spent countless hours praying, calling your soul to come
With you in our lives, we saw that we would be one
We got glimpses of you each time you were with us
However three times wasn’t enough and we couldn’t keep you near us
The sweetness, the joy, the sheer happiness,
Kept coming and going in pregnancy whiplash
You will never know how much I loved you dear one
I have no choice but to carry you with me for all days to come
Now all I am left with is memories and crushed dreams
And a broken heart who’s tears break the ripped seams
Some days I wonder how I will hold all the pain
And move through the world as if all is the same
It is lonely dear one without you in our lives
Your absence is felt in every day and night
I hold great anger and pain and a lurking shame
My body’s failure to carry you all of the way
I cannot fathom why this is true today
Maybe it is a curse or a spell that holds you away
Now we are left with the actions of coping and dealing
And the completely miserable growing and feeling
Why oh why dear one does this have to be true
All I wanted was to be with you
I can’t give myself permission to really stop and fall down
To scream out loud and have a meltdown
Responsibilities, holidays and birthdays go on
And at each moment I try to slap my happy face on
Smiling and laughing and swallowing the pain
When all these daily reminders of childlessness become thorns in my veins
Parenthood and children are the rituals of life
Now it’s just us and we have to think twice
Who and what are we left to be
Without your laughter and love little one
And all that was supposed to be?
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Posted 6/22/15 7:25 PM  |
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PhyllisNJoe
My Box Is Broken
Member since 6/11 9145 total posts
Name:
Phyllis
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Re: A poem that I wrote...
That was beautiful. Crying with you my friend.
I'm here.
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| Posted 6/22/15 8:33 PM |
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Peainapod
Peanuts are here!
Member since 1/09 13591 total posts
Name:
Diana
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Re: A poem that I wrote...
that is really beautiful!!
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| Posted 6/22/15 9:29 PM |
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JJ2014
LIF Adolescent
Member since 11/14 686 total posts
Name:
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Re: A poem that I wrote...
You got me crying. My heart breaks for you.
XOXO
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| Posted 6/22/15 10:34 PM |
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Lillies
Grateful for my babies!
Member since 2/12 4571 total posts
Name:
<3
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Re: A poem that I wrote...
Crying :(((
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| Posted 6/22/15 11:38 PM |
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nycgirl
Angels!
Member since 3/09 7721 total posts
Name:
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Re: A poem that I wrote...
Beautiful.
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| Posted 6/23/15 9:17 AM |
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MaeDe
LIF Adult
Member since 4/11 1169 total posts
Name:
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Re: A poem that I wrote...
I am at my desk crying. That was so moving.
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| Posted 6/23/15 9:28 AM |
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ANewDayHasCome
Love multiplies, not divides
Member since 11/12 14481 total posts
Name:
Me
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Re: A poem that I wrote...
Wow. That was beautiful and so heartfelt. Thank you for sharing. I hope that one day your dreams will come true.
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| Posted 6/23/15 11:13 AM |
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JDubs
different, not less
Member since 7/09 13160 total posts
Name:
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Re: A poem that I wrote...
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| Posted 6/23/15 11:17 AM |
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hoping2013
LIF Toddler
Member since 1/13 435 total posts
Name:
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A poem that I wrote...
Thanks so much to you each for reading it xo
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| Posted 6/24/15 10:45 PM |
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babydreams21
LIF Adult
Member since 12/12 3656 total posts
Name:
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A poem that I wrote...
Powerful words. Well said. I'm so sorry for the pain.
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| Posted 6/24/15 11:10 PM |
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A poem that I wrote...
Beautiful words. My heart breaks for you.
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| Posted 6/25/15 10:47 AM |
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backfor3
LIF Adolescent
Member since 9/14 568 total posts
Name:
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Re: A poem that I wrote...
wow what a beautiful poem.
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| Posted 6/25/15 4:23 PM |
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