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Watever143
LIF Adult
Member since 12/10 1537 total posts
Name:
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Depressed feelings
Anyone get really depressed after having a miscarriage and then getting pregnant again.. im so nervoua to tell.ppl bc the what ifs are in my.head.. im 3 1/2 mrhs already and not alot of ppl know
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Posted 4/20/17 5:07 PM |
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PennyCat
Just call me mommy :)
Member since 7/08 19084 total posts
Name: Jib
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Re: Depressed feelings
It's really hard That's all I've got.
Hopefully with each sono you feel start to feel better. Making it to 3 1/2 months is a great milestone.
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Posted 4/20/17 6:02 PM |
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mommy2be716
LIF Adult
Member since 1/16 2921 total posts
Name:
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Re: Depressed feelings
I had a miscarriage and an ectopic before getting pregnant with DD. While I was excited to have a healthy pregnancy, I found myself pretty depressed throughout the whole thing. I used to love seeing the family and going to parties, and I ended up skipping on two big events last year because I didn't really want to talk to people or have to talk about my pregnancy. I just kinda felt like I wanted to be left alone. I actually had a bit of a panic attack on the day of my baby shower because i didn't want to have to talk to everyone. I thought it was all just me being pregnant and cranky, but after she was born, I was much more possessive of her than I thought I would have been. I got bad depression/anxiety over having to go places with her and see groups of people (I still get that here and there).
I think alot of that comes from losing two babies before, but I'm not totally sure. I was once a very laidback person, and always said I would be the parent that passes her baby off to everyone and be more relaxed about parenting. I really think those two losses changed me/permanently scarred me a bit.
ETA: You will relax a bit with each sono I promise you that. While I always felt a little depressed along the way, I can tell you that I wasn't worried about the health of DD after my NT scan. Once that was over, I felt that I was in the clear
Message edited 4/20/2017 8:16:27 PM.
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Posted 4/20/17 8:14 PM |
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MrsPetro2B
LIF Infant
Member since 9/08 344 total posts
Name: A
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Re: Depressed feelings
Yes, totally normal. You are still mourning the loss and it is traumatic. You get robbed of the excitement of it all. You live from one sono to the next fearing the worst even after hearing everything looks good. I had 2 back to back MC's prior to DS. I told no one except close friends and family. I told no one at work and let them draw their own conclusions. I got "outed" on FB when someone posted a picture from my shower. I had a total anxiety attack when registering and didn't really want a shower. it got better for me toward the end. I could finally believe I was really pregnant and with the grace of God that kid would get here healthy and he did. That's what kind of pulled me out of it. You are not alone.
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Posted 4/20/17 9:41 PM |
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Watever143
LIF Adult
Member since 12/10 1537 total posts
Name:
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Depressed feelings
Thats the fear i have.. that what if something happens by the next sono. The more i tell people, the more im stressed. When im there and see the baby im.calm but not excited.. i was so excited with my first child. Now after the miscarriage im a nervous wreck.
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Posted 4/20/17 10:37 PM |
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PennyCat
Just call me mommy :)
Member since 7/08 19084 total posts
Name: Jib
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Re: Depressed feelings
I totally get it. Of course getting a good sono is reassuring, but in my pregnancies I always feel like the further I get, there's just that much more at stake. I know what it's like to have a mid second tri loss. It's terrible. Getting closer to that point in my pregnancies and even beyond it has always served as a reminder of how terrible it would be for things to then go bad. While most people leave those appointments with pure relief, I leave them just clinging to the hope that by the next sono, I'm still as lucky. It's all a balancing act.
Message edited 4/21/2017 10:06:42 AM.
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Posted 4/21/17 6:17 AM |
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PitterPatter11
Baby Boy is Here!
Member since 5/11 7619 total posts
Name: Momma <3
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Depressed feelings
I never had a miscarriage, but I dealt with IF/IVF for 3 years before finally getting a BFP. I was fine with telling our immediate families, but was hesitant to tell anyone else. I didn't tell my principal until 22 weeks since I was so mervous about the what ifs. I felt better about things once I looked pregnant and could feel the baby moving, which was 25-26 weeks. Plus then I knew he had a chance to survive outside of the womb, which provided me with some relief.
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Posted 4/21/17 10:20 AM |
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MrsKR88
LIF Adult
Member since 2/10 979 total posts
Name:
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Re: Depressed feelings
Posted by PennyCat
I totally get it. Of course getting a good sono is reassuring, but in my pregnancies I always feel like the further I get, there's just that much more at stake. I know what it's like to have a mid second tri loss. It's terrible. Getting closer to that point in my pregnancies and even beyond it has always served as a reminder of how terrible it would be for things to then go bad. While most people leave those appointments with pure relief, I leave them just clinging to the hope that by the next sono, I'm still as lucky. It's all a balancing act.
This is how I have felt as well (I also had a traumatic 2nd trimester loss.) I actually felt more at ease in my first trimester because I felt like I could handle an early loss better. Once I hit the second trimester, my anxiety and stress level increased from the fear of going through a later loss again.
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Posted 4/24/17 1:39 PM |
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hmm
Sweet
Member since 1/14 7993 total posts
Name:
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Depressed feelings
how are you feeling?
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Posted 5/7/17 9:09 PM |
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MrsMango
LIF Infant
Member since 8/14 231 total posts
Name:
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Depressed feelings
I had a miscarriage and then a successful pregnancy right after. we told our parents/siblings immediately because I knew I'd need them again if I had to go though another loss. Then we told our grandparents at 12 weeks & our aunt/uncles/cousins etc at 14 weeks. (mainly because it was summer, and if people saw me not drinking they would know immediately haha) we didn't announce on social media until almost 30 weeks. We also didn't register or anything until we had our anatomy scan. I was nervous my whole pregnancy, but as each week went on my fear eased a little.
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Posted 5/9/17 8:41 AM |
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Watever143
LIF Adult
Member since 12/10 1537 total posts
Name:
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Re: Depressed feelings
Posted by hmm
how are you feeling?
I am feeling a little better. Went to doctor friday and everything is great!! finally announced it on facebook and told most of the family. Still not as excited as I would think i would be, but I am hoping after all my crazy occasions I have it will be all about me. One day at a time
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Posted 5/9/17 9:50 AM |
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Watever143
LIF Adult
Member since 12/10 1537 total posts
Name:
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Re: Depressed feelings
Posted by MrsMango
I had a miscarriage and then a successful pregnancy right after. we told our parents/siblings immediately because I knew I'd need them again if I had to go though another loss. Then we told our grandparents at 12 weeks & our aunt/uncles/cousins etc at 14 weeks. (mainly because it was summer, and if people saw me not drinking they would know immediately haha) we didn't announce on social media until almost 30 weeks. We also didn't register or anything until we had our anatomy scan. I was nervous my whole pregnancy, but as each week went on my fear eased a little.
this sounds like how I am taking everything
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Posted 5/9/17 9:51 AM |
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an9elic
♥ HJ ♥
Member since 6/07 3331 total posts
Name: kristen
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Re: Depressed feelings
I am kind of feeling this way too.. Between each of my appointments I am constantly worried that something is wrong. When I am there having an ultrasound I am more calm, but then the next day I am worried again. My loss was 14 years ago, and I had a healthy baby after it!! I guess the worry never really goes away though. Sorry you are feeling this way and I hope it gets better soon.
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Posted 5/9/17 3:18 PM |
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