It’s A Girl Thing: A Woman’s “Self-Improvement Plan

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By Mia Bolaris-Forget

Looking back on my life, I’m more inclined to smile than frown. In fact, even my “bad” experiences taught me something significant. And, other than a few decisions that I should have headed “warnings” about and been “smarter” about, the journey, good and bad was what’s memorable and in retrospect fun.

And, while many ladies get caught up in the “drama” of it all, experts suggest what makes it all worth it and “bearable” is our attitude and the ability to pamper ourselves and our senses with life’s simple pleasures.

1. “Scale down”: Forget about the scale, at least once in a while. Stop limiting your joy by limiting you calorie intake. Instead give yourself permission to occasionally dig into some sweet treats by enjoying a slice of life and a slice of your own birthday cake, a glass of wine and a plate of pasta, especially when your among good company. Remember, while you can always shed those extra calories, you can never reclaim these “delicious” moments with family and friends.

2. The sky’s the limit: Is there someplace you’ve always wanted to visit or see? While no one is suggesting you put a grand-scale sojourn ahead of necessities, experts suggest you stop depriving yourself of fulfilling your dreams by putting them off for the “right time”, since there may not necessarily be one. Remember, you will always have work, home improvements, bills that need to be paid, etc. So, remember, there’s no time like the present and if your mate doesn’t want to join you, consider going with mom, your kids or a friend. And, if no one is available, experts suggest treating yourself and going alone. It may just inspire your mate to join you in the future, and it may give you something “spicy” and interesting to talk about.

3. Cash in: Dig yourself out of debt of potential debt by dealing in cash only (well, except for those “emergencies”). Remember at 18 to 20-something interest rates on most credit cards, unless you are paying off purchased promptly and immediately, you could be killing your credit. So, start by calling your credit card company and renegotiating your APR, most likely its more than your realize. Next, open up a separate savings account, because you’ll need to set aside some cash and start making some other money-saving changes (perhaps to finance that family or fantastic trip…see above). Consider making you coffee and lunch at home and hosing some wine and cheese night at your abode, rather than visiting a trendy, but often costly café. In the long run, you’ll be surprised at how much you save, even in a short time, especially if you are diligent and fastidious. Plus, you’ll begin to feel financially savvy and independent.

4. Reconnect: In this marvelous world of modern technology most of us spend more time on the computer than with each other. In fact, from blogs to emails we are often more connected to what’s going on, on the World Wide Web than we are about what’s going on in our own backyard and in our own relationships.
Put, down the mouse and push the keyboard aside. You may also want to set aside the juicy tabloids and instead pick up the phone and get in touch with an otherwise out-of-touch personal world. Make time for and plans with family and friends and start living your life instead of obsessing about exploring how others are living theirs.

5. Set up a “romantic” rendezvous just for you: Rather than wait for friends, family, or your mate to have time to show you a good time, make it a point to take yourself “out on a date). Set aside some personal and private time just for you, and whether that means heading to the local book store to catch up on some required reading with a latte, soaking in a tub of bubbles, or even trying out a new hot spot that your friends or mate may not be into, learn to treat yourself, so that you’ll be more of a treat to those around you.

6. Follow your dreams and your heart: While the “real world” may have gotten its claws and grip on you, especially when you’re thinking about paying bills and securing a stable future, remember to stay true to yourself. After all, if you’re not at least content in what you’re doing, you’ll eventually lose interest and enthusiasm perhaps compromising your performance, and hence your position and lets not even discuss what it can be doing to your attitude and health. So, whether you’re in your late 20s, 30’s or beyond, try to remember what makes you tick invest time in IT and yourself. Simply start out slowly, while earning a solid paycheck and remember the more you feed your dreams (even as a hobby), the more likely you can make your career dreams come true.

7. Boost your confidence: From revamping your look and your style, it’s all about redefining and feeling good about you. So, constantly “challenge” yourself to overcome and improve and give yourself a pat on the back when you do.

8. Look in the mirror: Instead of always worrying about and taking care of everyone else, stop and take a look at YOU. And, make sure you like what you see. If you don’t like what you are or have become, find cleaver and creative ways to change (always for the better). A new and improved and SATISFIED you, will mean new, improved and more satisfactory relationships.

9. Sex Education: Whether you husband or mate was “your first” (with nothing to compare it to) or one of a few (who you may be constantly comparing him to), its likely that the best way to keep things hot and spicy is knowing what works and pleases you. Accept your sexuality and find out and be honest about what you like, especially before making demands on you man.