The Parent Trap: Avoiding Feeling “Trapped” By Parenting

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By Mia Bolaris-Forget

My husband and I often get into (heated) discussions about the right way to parent (and we don’t even have kids). Still, it’s the error of others’ ways that opens up this Pandora’s box for discussion. And, while he’s definitely more of the “good cop” type, I have more of a “bad cop” mentality when it comes to disciplining children and raising responsible adults. In fact, I firmly believe that a huge part of enjoying your new job as a parent (and doing it well) is not only embracing the tremendous responsibility gracefully, but also finding a balance between the “old” you and the “new” you. And, there are definitely things you can do to make parenthood more pleasurable.

· Take a break Make sure you pencil in some time for YOU

· Learn a little “negativity” Remember, saying “no” isn’t always a “bad” thing. In fact it can help reset YOUR priorities. As long as no one is “deprived”, saying “no” from time to time is both recommended and fine.

· Assert your writes: Jot down or journal your experiences and feelings. This will help you put and keep things in perspective and it will offer clarity and make memories for the future.

· Change your outlook “express”: Many parents plow through the stages of parenthood, rarely taking the time to enjoy them. Slow down and enjoy each moment and experience as it happens.

· Make a kid connection: Remember, parenting mean MUCH more than just keeping a roof over your kid’s or kids’ head(s) and putting clothes on backs and food on the table. It means keeping your parent pants on while also forming a trusted friendship and connecting with them and creating a bond that won’t be broken even during adolescence (at least not for too long)

· Check mate: Don’t forget to keep your relationship with your mate in check. Yes, the kids (generally) do come first, but being a happy, healthy requires being a happy, healthy partner. So, keep your mate high on the priority list.

· Reach beyond your limits: Touch lives other than those you consider friends or family. It will make you feel good and it’s a GREAT lesson in life for the kiddies.

· Exercise your options: Make sure you keep physically and mentally fit. It will do a world of good for you, your kids and your parenting.

· KISS: Keep It Sensationally, Simple. Don’t try to complicate things just take things in stride and find fabulous ways to simplify your life.

· Practice self-preservation by being slightly selfish Taking good care of yourself will translate into taking better care of your family.