Transformers: Dealing With Children And Their Many Phases

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By Mia Bolaris-Forget

Raising kids can be quite exciting, especially as parents experience the various transitions their children go through, and according to experts, they go through a lot. Here are just some of what proud parents can expect and how to deal with it.

· Eye-eye: The one way to let kids know you are paying attention is my making and keeping eye contact. In fact, looking into their eyes says you care and informs them that you are really there and taking note to not only what they say, but also the truth their eyes reveal.

· Lessons in altruism: Help kids focus on telling the truth, even when they seem inclined to embellish the facts. According to experts all kids go through a similar stage and it’s up to you to find our WHY they feel the need to stretch the truth. Also, make sure you are giving your child plenty of attention when he or she isn’t sharing his or her “fish tale”, so they don’t learn to associate “lying” with getting they attention they want, crave, and need.

· Be prepared to do battle: Every child goes through a phase where he or she wants little or nothing to do with you. And, they most likely will begin to question your (good) judgement too. This, say experts, is especially true of girls. And, this they say can make parents feel like their losing control and power. Remember, keeping control means also being able to keep your cool, keep and open mind and be receptive to changes and some new ideas as you continue to be a hands-on parent.

· Help foster confidence, good behaviour and self-esteem: Kids won’t be able to please all of their peers all of the time, and that may mean being the brunt of some mean and nasty comments. Help kids get past this phase with dignity and grace

o Teach them to keep their cool even in the face of adversity, otherwise they let they bully win.

o Teach them alternative ways of coping and dealing such as kindness and humor

o Teach children how to show assertiveness through body language in an effort to fend of potential offenders.

o Teach them to talk the talk with strength and confidence rather than with doubt and anxiety. A strong, assertive voice can often be a saving grace.