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SweetestOfPeas
J'taime Paris!
Member since 3/06 32345 total posts
Name:
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I'm the only one in my group w/o kids - and I have a vent today!
there are 6 of us in my group at work, including my boss. everyone has at least 1 kid, except for me.
not a day goes by that someone in the group either needs to work from home, or comes in late (REALLY late), takes a 2-3 hour lunch, leaves early, etc etc b/c of their kids.
today I reached my boiling point. and I don't care if I get flamed, but how is this fair? I am at my desk on time or early every day, I never ask to work from home, I RARELY leave early (a handful of times a year at most) and most days, I don't even take a lunch break, let alone several hours worth.
I am not childless by choice, so maybe I am just jealous, but I feel taken advantage of. guess who has to pick up slack when others aren't around?
I am feeling very resentful today!
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Posted 3/31/09 7:28 PM  |
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GioiaMia
Let's Go Rangers!
Member since 1/07 14818 total posts
Name:
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Re: I'm the only one in my group w/o kids - and I have a vent today!
that is definitely not fair! its a tough situation, not sure if there is anyway to rectify it
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| Posted 3/31/09 8:08 PM |
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Lisa
I'm a PANK!!!
Member since 5/05 22334 total posts
Name:
Professional Aunts No Kids
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Re: I'm the only one in my group w/o kids - and I have a vent today!
I agree 100000% with you.
Its NOT fair....you should be able to take off to do a personal errand or just some me time and have your other co-workers step in from time to time!!
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| Posted 3/31/09 8:43 PM |
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Jackie24
~We Did it~
Member since 7/06 6718 total posts
Name:
Jackie
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Re: I'm the only one in my group w/o kids - and I have a vent today!
It's definitely not fair at all! While you don't have any "legitimate excuse to leave work, you should find one every now and then! I am sure those people would abuse the system even if they were childless, some people just have a stronger work ethic.
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| Posted 3/31/09 8:52 PM |
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Re: I'm the only one in my group w/o kids - and I have a vent today!
You're not alone. I think it is the lamest excuse and gets over played. I think if parents are going to be working parents, they need to make appropriate accomodations to not have their childcare interfere with work, unless there is a legitimate emergency.
This is especially true if others are responsible to pick up their slack. It's one thing if you make more work for yourself, but you don't do that to co-workers. Last time I checked the kid wasn't paying the bills, KWIM? 
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| Posted 3/31/09 9:06 PM |
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SweetestOfPeas
J'taime Paris!
Member since 3/06 32345 total posts
Name:
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Re: I'm the only one in my group w/o kids - and I have a vent today!
there is one woman in particular who is constantly either coming in late or taking off for a few hours to go to her kids school for a play or whatever.
must be nice to come and go as you please!
I really like this woman, she is a sweetheart. but I can't help but feel resentful.
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| Posted 3/31/09 9:06 PM |
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Re: I'm the only one in my group w/o kids - and I have a vent today!
Posted by SweetestOfPeas
I really like this woman, she is a sweetheart. but I can't help but feel resentful.
It's not being resentful. When at work, you are getting paid to do just that...work. Seriously, I would never tolerate that kind of behavior. My staff know that their schedules are their schedules and they make their accomdations (childcare, school, etc.) around that schedule if they want to remain employed!
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| Posted 3/31/09 9:12 PM |
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Jackie24
~We Did it~
Member since 7/06 6718 total posts
Name:
Jackie
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Re: I'm the only one in my group w/o kids - and I have a vent today!
Posted by BaseballWidow
Posted by SweetestOfPeas
I really like this woman, she is a sweetheart. but I can't help but feel resentful.
It's not being resentful. When at work, you are getting paid to do just that...work.
And this is the mentality of most bosses/supervisors. Even in the education field which is dominated by women. Most principals make you use your sick time.
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| Posted 3/31/09 9:17 PM |
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SweetestOfPeas
J'taime Paris!
Member since 3/06 32345 total posts
Name:
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Re: I'm the only one in my group w/o kids - and I have a vent today!
thank you for being supportive and allowing me to vent.
Its really unfair.
DH deals with this at his job too. he is one of the few at his job (small company) that doesn't have kids. so the boss relies on him heavily when he needs an issue resolved on weekends b/c the others are with their kids. he also deals with picking up slack while his co-workers leave early to go to their kid's lacross games or other activities.
since when is this acceptable?? 
Message edited 3/31/2009 10:02:23 PM.
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| Posted 3/31/09 10:02 PM |
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thewinterone
You make me happy
Member since 5/05 2474 total posts
Name:
cause you are gray.
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Re: I'm the only one in my group w/o kids - and I have a vent today!
That must be so frustrating .
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| Posted 3/31/09 11:35 PM |
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KirR
LIF Infant
Member since 1/09 146 total posts
Name:
K.
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Re: I'm the only one in my group w/o kids - and I have a vent today!
I am not currently in that situation but have been in the past and it breeds resentment amongst colleagues.
I got sick and tired of all the people who came and went as they pleased, "worked" from home, or simply didn't show up which was deemed ok because they had kids. If one of us unmarried (at the time), childless individuals tried to pull that stuff, we were spoken to about expectations. Talk about a double-standard.
IMO, having a child/children is not an acceptable excuse for a poor work ethic - you are paid to do a job, so do it!
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| Posted 4/1/09 8:35 AM |
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KittyKatCopper
missing my handsome boy
Member since 3/09 1579 total posts
Name:
Kat - HamptonsBride (LIW)
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Re: I'm the only one in my group w/o kids - and I have a vent today!
You don't deserve to get flamed at all for feeling this way...it's a legitimate vent...i've been there too...
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| Posted 4/1/09 8:44 AM |
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IrishLasss334
I'll be there soon!
Member since 1/08 6549 total posts
Name:
Patty
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Re: I'm the only one in my group w/o kids - and I have a vent today!
I completely agree with you. I do not have this problem at my current job (there are only 5 of us and no one has children), but at my last job I was really one of the few with no kids. Everyone was changing their hours, working different shifts, calling in sick b/c their kids were sick and those of us with no children were left to pick up the slack.
While we/I am sympathetic to the fact that things happen with kids, they get sick, etc. that does not mean those without kids or those who have other day care options (nanny/aupair/grandparents), shouldn't be treated the same.
We pointed out the Human Resources Mgr once that if someone left early/came in late b/c of dr. appt, etc. that we had to make up the time, but if it was something to do with "my kid/the kids" they didn't have to. It was unfair. She started making the people with kids make up their time and ALOT of leaving early/coming in late stopped.
You should not be flamed at all.
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| Posted 4/1/09 9:08 AM |
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anonttcer
BOOOO for fall!
Member since 7/06 10082 total posts
Name:
Meaning a NON ttcer!
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Re: I'm the only one in my group w/o kids - and I have a vent today!
You are not wrong for feeling this way because guess what? It ISN'T fair.
Black and white. Not fair.
Period.
Nobody should get special privledges and that's the bottom line. And if people do because of their children, well that is BS
I understand we all have obligations in life and sometimes we have to work from home, come in late, take a personal day, etc. But that is EVERYONE -regardless of if it's for your kids, your pet, your husband, your house, your car etc...and that's fine.
But doing it ALL the time- for ANY reason-(whether it be child related or pet related or home related) is not fair... period.
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| Posted 4/1/09 12:54 PM |
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ddunne2
LIF Adult
Member since 7/05 4189 total posts
Name:
Doreen
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Re: I'm the only one in my group w/o kids - and I have a vent today!
Is your boss approachable? if so, I'd have a candid discussion with him/her. Maybe they will allow you some early Fridays during the summer as an acknowledgement of your dedication to your job and the fact that you never have to leave because of outside commitments. Worth a shot!
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| Posted 4/1/09 3:59 PM |
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Jenn627
Laaaaaaaambert!
Member since 5/08 9818 total posts
Name:
Jenn
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Re: I'm the only one in my group w/o kids - and I have a vent today!
Ditto!!
AND - being a smoker - I get to take smoke breaks each day - do my co-workers get to go outside and do nothing but stand around? Nope.
It's funny how shitt works.
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| Posted 4/1/09 5:32 PM |
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SweetestOfPeas
J'taime Paris!
Member since 3/06 32345 total posts
Name:
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Re: I'm the only one in my group w/o kids - and I have a vent today!
Posted by ddunne2
Is your boss approachable? if so, I'd have a candid discussion with him/her. Maybe they will allow you some early Fridays during the summer as an acknowledgement of your dedication to your job and the fact that you never have to leave because of outside commitments. Worth a shot!
umm yea, that's not going to work...
even if I felt comfortable enough to raise this with her (which I don't), she has 2 young children herself and also works from home when they're sick, or leaves early for their Doc appts, etc.
eta: but I also want to add that my boss works VERY long hours, and puts in time over almost every weekend. she definitely is not setting the tone for the others in the group w/kids.
Message edited 4/1/2009 6:41:23 PM.
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| Posted 4/1/09 6:40 PM |
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